"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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Most men who have problems with women have self-esteem or self-confidence issues.

tesla8520

Senior Don Juan
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Self-esteem is how you see yourself as a person.
Self-confidence is what makes you feel confident in doing something.

There are people with good self-esteem but low self-confidence.
I consider myself one of them.


How the heck do you assess yourself and figure out which of the two needs improvement, and more importantly, how do you do it?
For example, what is the following, self-esteem or self-confidence?

Examples:
a) Entering an argument, being attacked and remaining calm, and saying "Is that a threat?" and still remaining calm, seeing the other person's reaction, and managing to defuse it.

b) Someone makes fun of you and you laugh. But they continue, so you say firmly, "Hey buddy, you've reached your limit, these are your last words," in a firm and calm tone. The person senses the monster inside you, becomes afraid, and regresses. However that buddy is, it could be a 200cm tall bodybuilder or a 140cm kid.

c) A woman shows you a little disrespect or acts like a *****, so you firmly take her, let her sit, and say, "Your behavior lately has been inappropriate toward me and towards our relationship; you've done 'this,' 'that,' and 'the other thing.'
There will be no more behavior like that in our relationship. That's all!" and you say in a calm tone, making sure she understood.

d) Someone jokes with your girlfriend, so you laugh. But he continues, and then you calmly and firmly say, "Dude, the joke's over."


I mean, when you say these things, it's as if you feel nothing inside.
You don't feel fear of what will happen next when you say them.
You simply said them from a core of total security that you don't care what happens next.
You've already made up your mind before you open your mouth.
Those who want to follow you will, and those who don't will suffer the consequences.
Do you understand what I mean?
Is it about self-esteem or self-confidence?

I think this trait is the main key to get any woman in your life.
Also to have a successfull life, and be respected among men.

You can still have this trait, but still a kind and "nice" man, in a way.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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behimo

Don Juan
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masculinity is discipline
order

feminity is freedom
chaos

rules save us from ourselves
the paradox is that discipline is true freedom

women need men
men want women

the difference is the need and want
you dont give yourself to what you want, you remain unmoved and enjoy it when it comes

you give yourself to what you need, you pursue it and commit to it
 
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