TyTe`EyEz said:
REALIZATION
When you first ask the girl you love for anal and she smiles and proceeds to grab some lube you didn't know she had.
LMFAO
This is my legendary story, all my friends know it and we laugh about it all the time. lets just say at the end of the night, i'm in the hospital, my hand is broken, and a cop is wondering why the hell aren't i dead of alchohol poisoning.
*Warning, it's a long ass night*
here in Toronto there are often Mansion Parties. The kind where a group rents out a mansion for a weekend or a night, hire some barstaff, get a good price on a huge amount of booze, and basically set up a one night club.
It's a nice change from bar/club scene.
i go with some buddies just to have a good time, we know a bunch of people there and it looks like a great night.
at teh coat check, i get pulled aside by this stoner looking dude, this is our conversation.
Me: whoa buddy, slow down what?
Him: *slurred* hey man, you got any gum?
Me: Gum?
Him: Ya man... it's not for me... it's for her
*up walks a hot chick, just as drunk. easily an 8*
Me: *Searches pockets, finds a pack* Here you go.
the chick quickly wolfs down a pieces and gives me a little hug. i figure the night is going well. i start to walk towards the main area where my friends are waiting for me. before i can the guy tells me to come upstairs in a bit. Okay...
I chat with my buddies, dance a bit with a chick i know, and down a few shots of rum. i figure i'm nice and lightly buzzed, time to head upstairs. i grab a 26 of vodka and head upstairs.
once i get there, it's a like a surreal painting, there's beanbag chairs, a few couches, the lights are low and there's a fog about teh room. the smell is pretty obvious and the stoner look wasn't lying.
in the middle of it all though, is a table with a huge assortment of drinks. i recognise most of it, though there are a few bottles of green stuff that i'm curious about.
the guy i met earlier waves me over, and motions me to sit next to the hot chick.
Needless to say, i'm happy as a pie.
we chat a bit, drink some (i stayed away from the pot, not my style) and find out some interesting facts.
The hot chick is actually his sister. i'm now worried, a boyfriend might get mad, but a brother will kill my ass.
They're european (specifically swedish) and are good friends of the peopel hosting the party.
The green alcohol is absynthe. crazy stuff.
We all start drinking the absynthe. it's insane. i've had strong liquor before but this was like a punch to the gut and a strong kick in the butt at the same time.
it's not long before i'm wasted, i go for broke and start with the chick. she's into it and her brother doesn't seem to care (crazy swedes)
I end up getting a bj right there, in front of her brother and 5 other people for like 5 minutes before he finally tells me to take it to the other room.
about 20 minutes later, i hear pandemonium outside. zip up, exchange phone numbers, and head downstairs.
as utterly wasted as i was, i distinctly remember hearing this.
"Jesus the cops are here!!"
"Everybody, Put down your drinks!"
"Oh god! I can't be seen with this drink, I'm 17!" (legal age here in 19)
"My mom is gonna KILL me!"
Everybody is running around panicing and i'm just laughing.
i don't know how long i wandered around, but eventually my friends find me and drag me around,
Friend: Aragon! jesus christ where the hell have you been?
Aragon: Upstairs...
Friend2: WTF happened to you man? where'd you get the beer?
Aragon: huh?
My other friend, had no choice but to snap a picture.
http://i11.photobucket.com/albums/a196/Aragon101/Crazy-night.jpg
Yeah....
i'm still curious as to where i got the beer.
The cops are still outside, the party is still going on. We all know it's about to end so we head to the bar, i'm still somewhat coherent and my friends do what any good friends do in a situation like this. give me more liquor.
as we down another few shots, the cops finally get inside. it's like the running of the bulls. in my crazy state, i end up taking a few swings at idiot guys who're about to trample me. I only connect with one but it had all my power. i don't even notice i can't feel my hand anymore, even less that my friends are now literally dragging me kicking and screaming out of this place.
we get outside, we're trying to evac and pronto. and run into 4 police cruisers outside and alot of the people from inside. somehow, we manage to get past these cops and we think we're home free, till we run smack dap into another line of 4 cruisers, these are breathalizing PEDESTRIANS.
Yes, they were making sure we weren't walking drunk.
/-
my friends all get .10-.15s and such, a good amount of booze in em.
Me... i blew .24
This and the cop noticed my mangled hand. Before i knew i was in an ambulance heading to the nearest hospital. I passed out sometime here and woke up the next day with both a drunk and disorderly fine, and a nice hospital bill to go with it. Thankfully everything was kept out of court, there was no way in hell i was gonna contest that fine.
In the end, i dated that chick for awhile, nothing really came of it, but i think getting a bj while her brother is looking and not really caring... Yeah, that was an experience.
P.S. this is by far the craziest time i've ever had, never happened again and i doubt it will.
