Here I go again with the workplace dillemas, but this one is more serious to me. In November this woman started at my job, we hit it off almost instantly. We work in a large area and we are free to roam as we choose, just as long as our work gets done for the day. To tell her situation, she had a wild background when she was younger but now has a little kid, going to back to school and is trying to lead a better life, the kid's father isn't in the picture and hasn't even met his child. In the beginning she would come to my work area a lot just to chit chat, especially when another woman would talk to me she would suddenly pop up, that's when I figured she had some interest in me.
I wanted to ask her out directly, but I noticed she started coming to my work area less and less, no big deal I thought, the work was piling up for everybody and so I figured she had less time, so I email her and asked her would she be interested in going out sometime. I receive the following....Hey, I am always up for making new friends. Thanks for being
so helpful. So if you do want to hang out as friends I would like
that, ttyl
She said the word 'friend' twice in that email, and I'm trying figure out what happened. When I saw her again at work she asked me was I offended by the email? The question caught me off guard and I told her no. Did I read her wrong, was she testing me, was it too early in the process or did she just not have any interest in me romantically? Ok whatever, didn't want to let it bother me but I just casually asked a girl who she had become friends with what was the deal, and the girl tells me that she thought I was a great guy but that she doesn't date co-workers because of a bad experience.
Ok I thought, so why was she always breaking her neck to talk to me if she only wanted me as a friend? It was what it was, but then I noticed something. I found the reason why she was coming to my work area less and less....she had struck up a 'friendship' with this other guy that I work with. He's a good guy, but I'm more laid back than him and he's seen as sort of 'charasmatic'. He speaks his mind a lot on things whether it's necessary or not, when stuff goes wrong in the workplace he's the first one to say something and takes it to the supervisor and sometimes even bold enough to take it over the supervisor's head. She began to give him more attention until the point where she wasn't even going to talk to me at all, I would still talk to her but only when I had to walk by her area. Then our conversations changed, they were shorter and only about work so I saw the writing on the wall, and it was in big, bold letters that said THIS GUY IS MORE EXCITING THAN YOU, SO I'M INTERESTED IN HIM NOW, GOODBYE!
This guy has four kids, child support issues and lives with another woman but he says they are not involved, I have NO kids, have my OWN house, OWN car and NO drama, I'm pretty stable right now.
Was I too boring to her and that's why she chose someone more fiery, is it too late to change it and reverse it? I think now she makes conversations out of guilt more than genuine interest, but I don't want her to act like that, it is what it is, she can go about her life and me my own.
I wanted to ask her out directly, but I noticed she started coming to my work area less and less, no big deal I thought, the work was piling up for everybody and so I figured she had less time, so I email her and asked her would she be interested in going out sometime. I receive the following....Hey, I am always up for making new friends. Thanks for being
so helpful. So if you do want to hang out as friends I would like
that, ttyl
She said the word 'friend' twice in that email, and I'm trying figure out what happened. When I saw her again at work she asked me was I offended by the email? The question caught me off guard and I told her no. Did I read her wrong, was she testing me, was it too early in the process or did she just not have any interest in me romantically? Ok whatever, didn't want to let it bother me but I just casually asked a girl who she had become friends with what was the deal, and the girl tells me that she thought I was a great guy but that she doesn't date co-workers because of a bad experience.
Ok I thought, so why was she always breaking her neck to talk to me if she only wanted me as a friend? It was what it was, but then I noticed something. I found the reason why she was coming to my work area less and less....she had struck up a 'friendship' with this other guy that I work with. He's a good guy, but I'm more laid back than him and he's seen as sort of 'charasmatic'. He speaks his mind a lot on things whether it's necessary or not, when stuff goes wrong in the workplace he's the first one to say something and takes it to the supervisor and sometimes even bold enough to take it over the supervisor's head. She began to give him more attention until the point where she wasn't even going to talk to me at all, I would still talk to her but only when I had to walk by her area. Then our conversations changed, they were shorter and only about work so I saw the writing on the wall, and it was in big, bold letters that said THIS GUY IS MORE EXCITING THAN YOU, SO I'M INTERESTED IN HIM NOW, GOODBYE!
This guy has four kids, child support issues and lives with another woman but he says they are not involved, I have NO kids, have my OWN house, OWN car and NO drama, I'm pretty stable right now.
Was I too boring to her and that's why she chose someone more fiery, is it too late to change it and reverse it? I think now she makes conversations out of guilt more than genuine interest, but I don't want her to act like that, it is what it is, she can go about her life and me my own.
