"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

Read more...

more time

3

32swf

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 1, 2003
Messages
90
Reaction score
0
Location
Virginia
I'd like to spend more time with my boyfriend of 9 months. Between work, judo practice, and a engineering grad class he's taken, I've been pushed to the back of his priority list.

Do I wait it out until he gets his studying schedule under control, or do I say something to him? I want to be direct, but I don't want to be a nag either.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

Read more...

E

ER!C L!VE

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 19, 2004
Messages
902
Reaction score
6
Age
52
Location
WORLDW!DE
That would just piss me off.

I've got all this shyt going on in my life and then my girlfriend starts bytching about how I don't spend enough time with her.

This is the reason why some men are successful and some are not. Their choice of woman can be their downfall.

Sure, I'll blow off work today to hang with you honey. I don't need to earn the extra 1k today just to make you happy.

Then there are the good women who understand that a man needs to work hard to get ahead in this world and allows him the freedom to attain the goals he desires. All the while supporting him and being there for him when he has time for her.

ya dig?
 
3

32swf

Don Juan
Joined
Apr 1, 2003
Messages
90
Reaction score
0
Location
Virginia
first of all, I don't bytch.

Second of all, I want him to MAKE time for me. I'm not going to sit around waiting for him to fit me in. I have my own life and if he doesn't have time for a relationship right now, then I want out.

I don't expect him to blow off work to spend time with me, but a relationship takes two people. Right now I don't feel like I have a boyfriend.
 
Paintballguy

Paintballguy

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jun 18, 2004
Messages
961
Reaction score
16
Location
Maryland
Maybe you should talk to him about it and not random people on the internet. But you gotta understand he just cant drop everything he has just for you. He has a life too.
 
P

PeeGee

Senior Don Juan
Joined
Apr 5, 2004
Messages
484
Reaction score
3
Age
46
Location
Ontario
Actually my AFC days might be helpful here. I once had a girlfriend who was 400 km away. But a few months later she moved nearer to me for the summer. This is where it applies to you:

She has a bunch of guy friends she hangs out with. Every day. They do things like play badminton or go out and eat, or whatever, and so whenever I try to get her to do something 'that night', her excuse is 'I have to go out with the guys'. And so this goes on for weeks on end, us arguing and ultimately after I told her off she ends the relationship.

But the point of this babble is that I wanted to spend time with her, and she didn't care enough to make time. So if I'm considered AFC for sticking with her, what does it say about you for doing the same?

eric live has the right idea -- if I was too busy to hang out with a girl, I would feel resentful to be made to hang out with said girl. But since I'm not around, should I expect her to just sit on her ass and wait for me? A big part of rapport is contact, and without contact she will drift. Flip the 'he' and 'she' and it applies to you -- if he won't make time, you can find somebody who will.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

Read more...

E

ER!C L!VE

Master Don Juan
Joined
Jul 19, 2004
Messages
902
Reaction score
6
Age
52
Location
WORLDW!DE
Hmmm perhaps he's not the right guy for you and you're not the right guy for him, then.

Don't feel like you have a bf? You think that'll change in the future? HA!

You're relationship is pretty much how it's going to be. He's comfortable in the routine he's in.

You girls think you can change guys....so funny...
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
22 Rules for Massive Success With Women
Top