Monogamy is about Kids not love

[PlayHer Man]

Interesting article on monogamy in primates. While they state this doesn't necessarily apply to humans... there are still some interesting correlations such as:

- Males commit because of scarcity (limited female supply)
- Males commit to protect children

In humans I think the first one applies strongly. The article states humans are not naturally monogamous.. which means monogamy most likely started in humans for one of the reasons above.

In modern times.. the main reason a man commits is obviously because he can't do any better. This only makes men in serious relationships look like bigger beta faggots.. especially of they live in a big metro area where there are loads of women around. Women being what they are today... why would you commit to ONE when you have no offspring with her? :crackup: :crackup:

Spin plates, spin plates, spin plates! If 90% of modern men insisted on spinning plates.. the quality of women would rise and the price to be with them would fall. Its clear as day.

Article --> http://news.yahoo.com/monogamy-may-sound-sweet-why-evolved-isnt-190422956.html

 

[Purefilth]

it is about the only thing that would hold me down. Not planning on getting any sprogs yet though

 

[Tictac]

The gene pool won't miss you.

 

[elpasorichard]

In humans I think the first one applies strongly. The article states humans are not naturally monogamous.. which means monogamy most likely started in humans for one of the reasons above.

As my favorite comedian Chris Rock has said "A man is only as faithful as his opportunities."

 

[The Duke]

In modern times.. the main reason a man commits is obviously because he can't do any better. Spin plates, spin plates, spin plates![/B] If 90% of modern men insisted on spinning plates.. the quality of women would rise and the price to be with them would fall. Its clear as day.

I don't disagree, however I do look at it a bit differently. What if it has nothing to do with not doing any better? What if he's tired of the shallowness of meaningless relationships(spinning plates). What if he's tired of spending the time it takes to have multiple plates? What if he's been there and done all that? What if he has accomplished his mission and decides he wants to commit to a single girl? Does this make him any lesser of a man?

Whats your end game here? What do you plan to do when you grow tired of spinning plates?

 

[PlayHer Man]

I don't disagree, however I do look at it a bit differently. What if it has nothing to do with not doing any better? What if he's tired of the shallowness of meaningless relationships(spinning plates). What if he's tired of spending the time it takes to have multiple plates? What if he's been there and done all that? What if he has accomplished his mission and decides he wants to commit to a single girl? Does this make him any lesser of a man?

Whats your end game here? What do you plan to do when you grow tired of spinning plates?

I man shouldn't NEED a woman to complete him in the first place. (As Burroughs often says)

My "end game" is to just keep getting better.. wiser, smarter, more traveled, more successful, etc. After that.. I'll have kids to pass on my genes and wisdom.

Making your ultimate goal in life "bonding with a woman" is the ultimate display of beta. Its AFC. Its placing the female on a pedestal as a prize or reward.

If you look around lots of women today are chasing their careers and don't give two sh!ts about men. Even in marriage they don't give a sh!t about the man.. just use him to pop out some kids then divorce him for the moolah. So why are man desperately chasing a "soul mate"? Do they have nothing better to do? :crackup:

 

[Colossus]

Making your ultimate goal in life "bonding with a woman" is the ultimate display of beta. Its AFC. Its placing the female on a pedestal as a prize or reward.

This I wholeheartedly agree with.

I am not one of those dudes who thinks monogamy only serves for child rearing though. There is all this demonizing of monogamy and marriage in the manosphere, and some of it for good reason, but these things aren't the problem. The PROBLEM is the attitude like the one above---making this your overarching life goal at the expense of something more meaningful and productive. We aren't meant to make a relationship our life.

 

[The Duke]

Spinning plates is definitely not very meaningful or productive. About all you gain is short term satisfaction and temporary ego boosts. I can honestly say I devoted far more time to "women" when I was spinning plates than I do now that I am in a ltr. To have multiple women at your disposal takes a lot of time and energy that you can't devote to your hobbies, sports, careers, etc. I simply have better things to do that are ultimately far more satisfying. There's a reason they say "pimp'n ain't easy".

The time it takes to always have 3-4 girls(plates) you are fuhking also puts women as the center focus on your life. This becomes your overarching life goal. So in a way its putting "women as a collective group" on a pedestal. The guy that does so is doing little else with his life. There simply isn't enough time to do anything else. How is this any different than the guy who puts too much focus on one girl?

I just don't feel that spinning plates is all that alpha.

 

[speed dawg]

(As Burroughs often says)

You getting schizophrenic?

If you look around lots of women today are chasing their careers and don't give two sh!ts about men. Even in marriage they don't give a sh!t about the man.. just use him to pop out some kids then divorce him for the moolah. So why are man desperately chasing a "soul mate"? Do they have nothing better to do? :crackup:

Good questions. But I believe you're better off trying to find decent women, applying the necessary game to them, and possibly having a relationship with them. You, on the other hand, are coming from a point of anger. Sh*t, I don't like these wh*res either, but at some point, it is what it is. Quit b*tching about them and stay away from them. Let them and the betas commiserate together.

Very, very small minded, you are. It's unfortunate too, because you make great points at times. Just overly narcissistic and unable to take disagreement and/or construction criticism of your arguments. That's all good, it's part of the process. You'll come around.

 

[PlayHer Man]

Spinning plates is definitely not very meaningful or productive. About all you gain is short term satisfaction and temporary ego boosts. I can honestly say I devoted far more time to "women" when I was spinning plates than I do now that I am in a ltr. To have multiple women at your disposal takes a lot of time and energy that you can't devote to your hobbies, sports, careers, etc. I simply have better things to do that are ultimately far more satisfying. There's a reason they say "pimp'n ain't easy".

The time it takes to always have 3-4 girls(plates) you are fuhking also puts women as the center focus on your life. This becomes your overarching life goal. So in a way its putting "women as a collective group" on a pedestal. The guy that does so is doing little else with his life. There simply isn't enough time to do anything else. How is this any different than the guy who puts too much focus on one girl?

I just don't feel that spinning plates is all that alpha.

If that's what you believe then you either:

1. Don't spin plates correctly.

OR

2. Have never spinned plates so have no idea how it works.

Its very easy to have multiple women at your disposal without giving them ALL your time. You can have 1 or 2 as booty calls (just call them a few times a month to f*ck) and have maybe one FWB you see often (3 times a week or so) and the rest are just random chicks you approach here and there that you're attracted to. They are all in the running to replace the current FWB or booty calls if they pass the test.

But as long as you're the "sexy player" most women won't need much attention from you until you've been f*cking them for a long time and they start to feel cheap. This is what new approaches are for --> To replace old girls who are becoming high maintenance.

So as you see.. you'll usually have one main plate (FWB) that takes up the most time and some others that you dial occasionally.

There is still plenty of time to have hobbies, work, play and drink.

You getting schizophrenic?



Good questions. But I believe you're better off trying to find decent women, applying the necessary game to them, and possibly having a relationship with them. You, on the other hand, are coming from a point of anger. Sh*t, I don't like these wh*res either, but at some point, it is what it is. Quit b*tching about them and stay away from them. Let them and the betas commiserate together.

Very, very small minded, you are. It's unfortunate too, because you make great points at times. Just overly narcissistic and unable to take disagreement and/or construction criticism of your arguments. That's all good, it's part of the process. You'll come around.

You're a very BORING man Speed Dawg.

If you want to be a beta fag.. then do it. I prefer to spin plates. Is that ok with you? Good

 

[speed dawg]

You're a very BORING man Speed Dawg.

SoRrY. nOt EnOuGh emoticons and HUGE FONTS for you? :crackup: :cheer: :rock: :kick:

 

[Colossus]

Spinning plates is definitely not very meaningful or productive. About all you gain is short term satisfaction and temporary ego boosts. I can honestly say I devoted far more time to "women" when I was spinning plates than I do now that I am in a ltr. To have multiple women at your disposal takes a lot of time and energy that you can't devote to your hobbies, sports, careers, etc. I simply have better things to do that are ultimately far more satisfying. There's a reason they say "pimp'n ain't easy".

The time it takes to always have 3-4 girls(plates) you are fuhking also puts women as the center focus on your life. This becomes your overarching life goal. So in a way its putting "women as a collective group" on a pedestal. The guy that does so is doing little else with his life. There simply isn't enough time to do anything else. How is this any different than the guy who puts too much focus on one girl?

I just don't feel that spinning plates is all that alpha.

The whole reason "spinning plates" (hate that term) is espoused is to encourage guys to get more experience with women and to keep their options open so they don't pedestalize any one particular girl. Of course it can be time consuming, and a lot of guys make getting laid their #1 goal. I dont think this is healthy either.

Game is so much simpler than it's made out to be. Be masculine, be socially aware, advance yourself and your position in life, have multiple hobbies, and don't put up with bad behavior. Sexing multiple women is not a requirement.

Oh, and anyone who plugs ONE philosophy over all others (i.e. spin plates all the time or you're a fag) should be taken with a grain of salt. They are underdeveloped.

 

[MikeOck]

I see spinning plates as analogous to test driving cars. Some people just walk into a dealership and buy the first car that looks nice. They don't question the price, the history, the mileage, the specs, they just think it looks nice and they want it so they take it home. Other people test drive different cars every weekend, they have no intention of ever buying a car, they just like to drive different cars and they have nothing better to do. Finally you have the people who want to buy a car, but they know they need to have an informed opinion of the various cars on the market, and the only way to really know the different cars is to try out many of them to figure out what is important to them in a car.

 

[Zarky]

Funny, what I got from that article is that nobody's yet figured out why humans are monogamous, from an evolutionary standpoint at least.

And I find it endlessly hilarious about dudes calling each other alpha and beta in these threads, as usual.

 

[PlayHer Man]

I see spinning plates as analogous to test driving cars. Some people just walk into a dealership and buy the first car that looks nice. They don't question the price, the history, the mileage, the specs, they just think it looks nice and they want it so they take it home. Other people test drive different cars every weekend, they have no intention of ever buying a car, they just like to drive different cars and they have nothing better to do. Finally you have the people who want to buy a car, but they know they need to have an informed opinion of the various cars on the market, and the only way to really know the different cars is to try out many of them to figure out what is important to them in a car.

And then you have people who make their entire life goal to "own a car" and believe that if they don't end up with a great car at some point in life.. then their entire life is meaningless and empty.

Those people are beta fags.

 

[LorenzoVonM]

Spinning plates is definitely not very meaningful or productive.

Nothing has meaning until you or someone else gives it meaning. For me its neither good nor bad. Its just a way of living.

About all you gain is short term satisfaction and temporary ego boosts.

Then you did it for external validation. Be complete within yourself. and you can have it be another positive in your life. Just like going out to get an awesome steak dinner, or a travel experience.

I can honestly say I devoted far more time to "women" when I was spinning plates than I do now that I am in a ltr. To have multiple women at your disposal takes a lot of time and energy that you can't devote to your hobbies, sports, careers, etc. I simply have better things to do that are ultimately far more satisfying. There's a reason they say "pimp'n ain't easy".

Doesn't have to be that way. I have a rotating circle of hookups in my life. They understand me and how I live. We come together and have deep conversations and we care for each other but are not attached. When our time is up we go separate ways. You need to have conviction. Girls will follow your lead. Some will drop off but that allows you to meet more awesome girls. Spread the love, you've got tons to give.

The time it takes to always have 3-4 girls(plates) you are fuhking also puts women as the center focus on your life. This becomes your overarching life goal. So in a way its putting "women as a collective group" on a pedestal. The guy that does so is doing little else with his life. There simply isn't enough time to do anything else. How is this any different than the guy who puts too much focus on one girl?

Again, you are looking at it like its a chore. Be a strong man, set your frame and women will follow without you having to constantly be texting them and bringing them out. They will follow your lead. Some you will see once a month, some every two months, some every week. Fit them in with your lifestyle. If they drop off you are fine with that.

 

[Aristippus]

Playher said "So why are man desperately chasing a "soul mate"?"

:: In a fake lispy voice:: Because men are from Mars and women are from Venus.

Colossus said: "There is all this demonizing of monogamy and marriage in the manosphere, and some of it for good reason, but these things aren't the problem. The PROBLEM is the attitude like the one above---making this your overarching life goal at the expense of something more meaningful and productive. We aren't meant to make a relationship our life."




I think this is part of it. I think good relationships can be a very enjoyable and a very important part of your life. When I say "relationships" I mean friendships, family relationships and romantic/sexual relationships. The problem isn't the romantic relationship in and of itself. The problem is the expectations in a relationship of that nature are usually unfair or constricting in some way.

One or both parties in some way usually gets the short end of the stick or someone is expected to give up too much. In a lot of cases it's the men who get the short end of the stick. In some cases it could be the woman but I think far more often, the man is expected to make tremendous sacrifices but these sacrifices aren't really appreciated.

Many men would like a marriage with a woman who enjoys sex, loves him, respects him, appreciates his sacrifices, isn't overly-demanding, and where he can have a good relationship with a reasonable amount of freedom. This is very hard to find unfortunately. Because the well of women has been poisoned in a lot of ways, men have to take measures to protect themselves from a relationship gone wrong.

Playher might disagree with me, which is fine, but I think you have a spectrum of men that may lean more toward serial monogamy and others who might be more polygamous. There are pros and cons to each. In the end, we all want good relationships and good sex. If you're having sexual relationships with a bunch of high-maintenance women who are a headache and who disrespect you, you're less successful than the man who has one woman that loves and respects him. It's also true the other way around. A man with one woman who treats him like crap isn't as successful as the man who has 2 or 3 women that are very sexual and respect him and treat him good.

I knew a guy who had lots of women but he allowed them to treat him like garbage and tolerated a lot of disrespect from them just for the sex. he sold his soul and sacrificed his own self-respect just to have regular sex with women who weren't worth the trouble. LOTS of them, but still, mouthy, disrespectful, annoying, with no redeeming qualities. In spite of their good looks, I wouldn't give these types the time of day. I think of him as less of a man for selling his soul for the p*ssy. Juggling women isn't all fun and games and rose-colored glasses as Playher might make it sound. There is a deal of b.s. you have to wade though. There are a lot of women any self-respecting man should weed out even for the short term. Everything has its pros and cons. You just have to decide what works for you.

 

[The Duke]

Lorenzo- you are quite a ways off in your "analysis". Sorry go fish!

 

[zekko]

Playher might disagree with me, which is fine, but I think you have a spectrum of men that may lean more toward serial monogamy and others who might be more polygamous. There are pros and cons to each. In the end, we all want good relationships and good sex. If you're having sexual relationships with a bunch of high-maintenance women who are a headache and who disrespect you, you're less successful than the man who has one woman that loves and respects him. It's also true the other way around. A man with one woman who treats him like crap isn't as successful as the man who has 2 or 3 women that are very sexual and respect him and treat him good.

That sounds far more logical and mature than "If you disagree with me then you are a beta faggot".

Oh, and anyone who plugs ONE philosophy over all others (i.e. spin plates all the time or you're a fag) should be taken with a grain of salt. They are underdeveloped.

Yep.

 

[LorenzoVonM]

Lorenzo- you are quite a ways off in your "analysis". Sorry go fish!

Feel free to tell me where you think I'm "off". I said spinning plates did not have to be what you made it out to be. That is perspective and experience to contrary.