Mission: How to Get Girl Discreetly

[The Comeback Kid]

A couple weeks ago, I briefly met a HB8 who I clicked with right away. A few new friends of mine and I went to a small party and I met her there. While things went great and my game was on, I forgot to ask for her number (we are Facebook friends, but that's not the same). Fine, I'd see her in a few days the next time everyone gets together. Unfortunately, I haven't seen her since, largely in part because my new friends haven't been able to do a whole lot lately.

I figure it's time to take control and make things happen. But how? See, I can definitely ask the guys I know what they plan on doing this weekend - if they're doing anything, I'll hang out with them (we're not "buddies" yet, I'm working towards that). However, I want this girl to be there too. They know this HB8 much better than I do, but nothing is a guarantee when it comes to everyone being together.

The obstacle is, I don't want the world knowing my intentions. I want to keep it on the down-low and not have my cover blown. If I mention HB8 to these guys, they'll probably know where my mind is right away. My biggest concerns are: 1.) My mystery/cover will be blown...girls don't like predictable. 2.) Maybe they'll make a move on her, knowing that there's competition now, I've seen this happen before.

Any tips/suggestions? I'm thinking that I will mention her. If I have to "explain," I'll say she was pretty cool and I enjoyed her company. If they start to tease me, I'll confidently brush it off and move along. I WILL NOT ask her out on Facebook. Anyway, it's been 2 weeks since I met her...nothing is happening unless I see her again.

 

[nateistoraw]

if shes into you enough, you can ask her for her number via facebook.

 

[The Comeback Kid]

I guess that's a possibility...the only thing is that it's been two weeks. I usually ask for the number in person. I use Facebook for small talk, not for making moves.

 

[hansol]

Just do your thing on facebook, make small talk or whatever, then quickly end the conversation with how "you gotta jet, but you'll give her a ringer later. Oh by the way, what's your number anyway?" If she digs you, you'll get the number. Keep it casual and it won't come across as anything less than normal.

And why don't you want to chill with this girl WITHOUT those other dudes hanging around? Trying to game a chick with guys around that either aren't your good friends/wingman is infinitely harder. Not only do you have to game the chick, but you have to game the crowd as well. Given the choice, I'd take just the chick. FAR easier than entertaining a crowd.

 

[SandHawk]

This will work if the girl likes you, she'll hand you the number.

I met a girl 2 weeks ago at some weekend, exchanged details and lots her number for some dumb ass reason(Accidently deleted the wrong contact). Anyway, she was on the mailing list of the weekend away, so I just send her a mail like "Hey, now that you added me on LinkedIn, we need to keep the connection 'warm'. How about some coffee on thursday? I lost your number, so could you send me yours or just ring me on <my number here>? x, SandHawk".

Within 15 minutes, she ringed up, said she was busy and that she'd love to re-schedule to sunday. So it can work if you have enough rapport.

 

[The Comeback Kid]

Thanks for the advice, that's why I come here.

So I could Facebook her asking for her # and I'd like to take her out to something small (like coffee) later this week. Even though it's been a little while, we seem to have a good rapport.

As you said Hansol, I would most like to see her without the other guys there. Right now, that's my segway into seeing her, but perhaps I can go around that. Pimpsicle made a good point a few weeks ago though...I haven't seen her in two weeks (only met once)...what momentum does this have right now?

While Facebook it's just wall posts and PM's, AIM obviously is live, at-the-moment. Her AIM is on her Facebook, but it may come off as stalker-ish if I was to IM her. Maybe it's ok? I don't do a lot of facebook dating stuff lol (I usually do it in person or over the phone).

 

[The Comeback Kid]

I was talking to a good friend of mine about this topic as well, he feel facebook pm-ing (not wall post) can come off as "weird" while an IM is a little bit better. What do you guys think? She doesn't appear to be on AIM much at all, but is on Facebook more often.

If only I had her phone number ...

 

[GrimPhallic]

Facebook instant messenger is fine to use. I have pulled two #s recently from it. You have to have a good convo first of course, make her feel comfortable yada yada.

Austin

 

[The Comeback Kid]

Facebook instant messenger is fine to use. I have pulled two #s recently from it. You have to have a good convo first of course, make her feel comfortable yada yada.

Austin

Cool. However, I'm not talking about Facebook chat. I'm talking about the personal message things, where there's an inbox (it's like e-mail but on Facebook). Should work just as well? Or no?