"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

Read more...

Misogynistic viewpoints.

iqqi

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reset said:
LOL @Mr.Me. Yeah I don't know any guys like that, but I've heard the term probably hundreds of times. I always thought it was a "player" or a womanizer. I didn't know it meant outright hatred to the point you'd almost throw the chick overboard.
It doesn't. That is an extreme example. :rolleyes:

That is like saying racists are only the people who murder or attack.

Misogyny is a viewpoint, not a verb.
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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I wish we had moderators here on SoSuave.

Disappointing to see a four page thread with only three or four posts actually on topic.

Why are people here so reluctant to confront the real issue?
 

ketostix

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iqqi said:
It doesn't. That is an extreme example. :rolleyes:

That is like saying racists are only the people who murder or attack.

Misogyny is a viewpoint, not a verb.
You are twisting logic. A racist is someone who favors one race to another. And misogyny is the hatred of women. It's not a viewpoint. You are trying to redefine the terms.
 

reset

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iqqi said:
It doesn't. That is an extreme example. :rolleyes:

That is like saying racists are only the people who murder or attack.

Misogyny is a viewpoint, not a verb.
Yeah, I think what he was getting at was that the guy would WANT to throw the chick overboard, just for being a woman. Not that he would actually do it. I don't think the hilarious sea captain in our story actually killed the chick--although Mr.Me only knows how the story turned out.

But like I said, I grew up believing this word meant "player". Obviously I picked up the wrong meaning.
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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reset

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LeComteDeMonteCristo said:
I wish we had moderators here on SoSuave.

Disappointing to see a four page thread with only three or four posts actually on topic.

Why are people here so reluctant to confront the real issue?
we have moderators, here at SoSuave.
 

ketostix

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LeComteDeMonteCristo said:
I wish we had moderators here on SoSuave.

Disappointing to see a four page thread with only three or four posts actually on topic.

Why are people here so reluctant to confront the real issue?
Ok but since when did we only reply to the OP in a thread and not to side points made by others when the OP's not even posting anything else in the thread? And what is his topic anyway, "too many "bitter" posters on sosuave, This is their problem, and not all women are xyz" or what? Maybe some people disgare that there's too many bitter posters on here. Your last post weren't exactly on topic either.
 

ketostix

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reset said:
But like I said, I grew up believing this word meant "player". Obviously I picked up the wrong meaning.
See that's just it. When people label ,the word they use can mean anything and everything or nothing at all. Players aren't generally considered misogynists though.
 

reset

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The fact that the OP used the word misogynistic speaks volumes about what this site is about---and it's being discussed. That's a bigger issue.
 

The Deacon

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Danger said:
I find it interesting that you hear this word often on Television. Why do you think that is?
You know the answer to that question, Danger. The news, sitcoms, even cartoon shows throw the feminist ideas around.

This is off-topic though. I'm only talking about the bitterness on these boards, not about a concrete definition of misogyny that everyone can agree on. The guy I used as an example I used in the OP is nothing short of a genuine misogynist. I don't know what more you guys want.

Maybe I shouldn't have put my age on my profile.

edit: And if you're not one of those guys who writes bitter posts, then this thread isn't talking about you.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Microphone Fiend

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I find it funny how the original topic is men being misogynistic and then we somehow start blaming misogyny on feminist. How ironic...

I think the problem at SS starts when we take women's actions to be true for the entire gender, especially the negative ones. When people try and create these binary oppositions and ideas of an us vs them mentality, it is just a matter of time until in our minds women start to embody what is that antithesis of a man. The problem arises from men blaming one woman's mistakes on the 'nature' of females instead of realizing that you were just dating a fvcked up b!tch. I don't want to name names but all that LMS stuff blaming things on nature is idiotic. But then again, if you choose to follow someone who bashes gays and other religions well what do you expect..


MrNotebook said:
I think some guys come onto this forum and lose sight and miss a vital lesson that part of being a real man to women includes having utmost respect for them...even though you really just want to bone 'em.
Uhhhh no. Elicit Values and find out what she likes and go from there. Generalizations like this is what causes the problem. Different women want different things. Not everyone wants/deserves respect. Maybe in the utopian world but not in real life.

These idea of what constitutes a 'real' man and a 'real' woman are old fashioned and harmful
 

Mr. Me

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Long winded posts about the misuse of the word , are rants,
Last post around, you wrote that those posts were really all about semantics, but now you're calling them rants...

I read that definition of "rant" that you posted, and nowhere in it do I see "long winded" as part of that definition, let alone leading to the conclusion you draw.

Not that I see any such "long winded" posts here to begin with anyhow.

So you're saying then that these posts offering up definitions and examples are actually "attacks on ideas".

Well, what I see in your posts, as per these examples above, are a lot of un based allegations about these other posts. You're trying to paint them as things they are not by calling them names such as "rants", "long winded", "attacks", "lacking proven claims".

So, this does nothing to encourage me to think any different than what I posted earlier, which was, apparently when people disagree with your viewpoint, your method is to cast aspersions on them and twist your arguments around.

Those are the very same tactics lawyers try to discredit credible witnesses with when they can't actually dispute their testimony, so that alone makes me believe I'm on the right track.
 
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