I just joined this forum and started reading this website. I've been reading and watching videos on how to approach and meet women for almost a year now and I've only been able to approach handful of times with the help of a wingman, I've been trying a very long time to teach myself to go up and approach in public during daily life. I'll get into a great mindset, but as soon as the actual situation comes up I can't get myself to take action. This has been going on for a long time and I don't know how to break out of this mindset. I'm here because I think that community and interacting with people who 'get it' will help me. I want to be able to go up to the girls I see every day, and I don't mind being rejected. What creates a downward psychological drift for me is the repeated failure of myself for ever being able to actually do what I want to do in this situation. I'm open to any and all advice to get past this.
Hello Friend,
If this is your first visit to SoSuave, I would advise you to START HERE.
It will be the most efficient use of your time.
And you will learn everything you need to know to become a huge success with women.
Thank you for visiting and have a great day!
Mental Block to Approaching
- Thread starter JohanDahl
- Start date
Everyday as u walk down a street, look at every men u come across in the eyes. Hold it steady and don't fidget.
From experience 95% of men will look away or downcast their eyes.
Those that do return ur eye contact, keep it steady and when they get close you smile and give them a friendly nod - this is important.
Once u hv handle this well and subconsciously do it everyday, u r able to hold ur own with women.
From experience 95% of men will look away or downcast their eyes.
Those that do return ur eye contact, keep it steady and when they get close you smile and give them a friendly nod - this is important.
Once u hv handle this well and subconsciously do it everyday, u r able to hold ur own with women.
Good idea with the eye contact approach. Essentially get this down and then start locking eyes and smiling at women you walk past, and then go ahead initiate a conversation since you've already smiled and acknowledged each other. For getting over the daygame mental block did you have to walk around in a busy area for a long time before you hit that **** it moment? I've done a lot of walking around try to hit this breaking point where I just do it.
DEEZEDBRAH
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TS, you approach the way you would having pulled, gone in raw, beat it ****ing rotten, stuck it in her popper, and blew on her face post haste. Every chick is practice. Smash, balls deep or next. Wash/Rinse/Repeat.
Furthermore, no matter how hot, don't make it like she hasn't seen one up close before. There is a saying about, how hot a woman is and there being some man out there sick of ****ing her. Food for thought.
Furthermore, no matter how hot, don't make it like she hasn't seen one up close before. There is a saying about, how hot a woman is and there being some man out there sick of ****ing her. Food for thought.
MrWood
Master Don Juan
MrWoods random line #745
go to the store any weekend morning where some cute cashier works.
look at her and say with a slightly disaproving snark... "Cute girls should'nt have to work on Sat/Sun mornings"
(do not say "a cute girl like you")
go to the store any weekend morning where some cute cashier works.
look at her and say with a slightly disaproving snark... "Cute girls should'nt have to work on Sat/Sun mornings"
(do not say "a cute girl like you")
think of approaching as like going to the gym.
when we first get there - before we do heavy lifting - we need to warm up, starch our body, start with some low weight and work ourself till we can do some heavy stuff.
it's hard to go straight from being totally unsocial like sitting in front of a laptop for a few hours into being ultra social and opening up hot girls on the street. it just feels like a huge stretch.
so, remembering the gym analogy. when you go out in public, start with warming up. talk to some random people (dudes, old people, whatever)
ask for street direction , ask for the time, make conversation with staff people , be friendly, ask them how are they , how long have they been working there , compliment on their shoes, whatever.
then once you feel your social gears are all warmed up - opening up girls will feel much less intimidating and natural.
when we first get there - before we do heavy lifting - we need to warm up, starch our body, start with some low weight and work ourself till we can do some heavy stuff.
it's hard to go straight from being totally unsocial like sitting in front of a laptop for a few hours into being ultra social and opening up hot girls on the street. it just feels like a huge stretch.
so, remembering the gym analogy. when you go out in public, start with warming up. talk to some random people (dudes, old people, whatever)
ask for street direction , ask for the time, make conversation with staff people , be friendly, ask them how are they , how long have they been working there , compliment on their shoes, whatever.
then once you feel your social gears are all warmed up - opening up girls will feel much less intimidating and natural.
Dude i have approached hundreds of women in my life. I am black and black guys make approaching an Olympic sport. They approach anything no matter how they look lol. Most of it is cultural and genetic. Some guys grow up with it being normailized and some guys have natural charm. Since you may not have these attributes its going to be more difficult for you. We all have our strengths. But this doesnt mean that you cant get competent at it.
1.) Have a good goofy energy. Dont be serious at all. Find some funny pick up lines and use them. Say them tongue in cheek as if you know they are corny. Most girls will laugh. Go up to a girl and tell her that you recognize her from high school. Most girls will stop and give you a skeptical grin. Thats your opening. Play along with the act. Say " do you know Mike from high school ( super generic name)" and its kinda a fun opener. She will ask you what was the name of the school and then you can tease her with that alone. Its one of the best openers if you do it playfully.
2.) Remember rejection is better than regret. THE WORST FEELING EVER is when you are alone and kicking yourself for not going up to that super cute girl on the subway. You may have totally changed your destiny if you had approaced. The girl i am dating now I got her because of approaching. I had been rejected twice within that night. One of the rejections was brutal. But you never know which one will stick. REGRET IS WORSE THAN REJECTION!
Its always nerve racking. Thats part of the fun. Multi platinum singers and comedians will tell you that they still get nervous to this day before getting on stage. Fear is very closely related to fun.
Approaching may not be your strength and thats ok. But there is always room for improvement.
1.) Have a good goofy energy. Dont be serious at all. Find some funny pick up lines and use them. Say them tongue in cheek as if you know they are corny. Most girls will laugh. Go up to a girl and tell her that you recognize her from high school. Most girls will stop and give you a skeptical grin. Thats your opening. Play along with the act. Say " do you know Mike from high school ( super generic name)" and its kinda a fun opener. She will ask you what was the name of the school and then you can tease her with that alone. Its one of the best openers if you do it playfully.
2.) Remember rejection is better than regret. THE WORST FEELING EVER is when you are alone and kicking yourself for not going up to that super cute girl on the subway. You may have totally changed your destiny if you had approaced. The girl i am dating now I got her because of approaching. I had been rejected twice within that night. One of the rejections was brutal. But you never know which one will stick. REGRET IS WORSE THAN REJECTION!
Its always nerve racking. Thats part of the fun. Multi platinum singers and comedians will tell you that they still get nervous to this day before getting on stage. Fear is very closely related to fun.
Approaching may not be your strength and thats ok. But there is always room for improvement.
DEEZEDBRAH
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You hit on everything thin, young, and attractive with a pulse. You pull or next her. The target is top form smv. Not baby rabies. Not bulking season. Not the milks home bad.
You chat up babes everywhere the way you would if you had already beat it rotten and emptied your balls in her rectum and mouth. You hit on her the way you would after your proteins are doing the backstroke in her digestive tract.
I am nonchalant. Aloof. Zero ****s given. You sir are born into royalty. All you have to do is wear the ****ing crown. Go get baes. Rest assured, her smv is plummeting and a lot of times, cratering. Nothing about baby rabies or biological clock ticking gets my **** hard. It's like seeing the best before date of expired meat. This isn't appetizing. Cratered smv isn't attractive. Nor is raising Chad's baby or playing house with Chad's booty call.
New girls are turning 18 everyday.
Come @ me bro.
You chat up babes everywhere the way you would if you had already beat it rotten and emptied your balls in her rectum and mouth. You hit on her the way you would after your proteins are doing the backstroke in her digestive tract.
I am nonchalant. Aloof. Zero ****s given. You sir are born into royalty. All you have to do is wear the ****ing crown. Go get baes. Rest assured, her smv is plummeting and a lot of times, cratering. Nothing about baby rabies or biological clock ticking gets my **** hard. It's like seeing the best before date of expired meat. This isn't appetizing. Cratered smv isn't attractive. Nor is raising Chad's baby or playing house with Chad's booty call.
New girls are turning 18 everyday.
Come @ me bro.
Last edited:
wifehunter
Master Don Juan
Assuming you have a mission or path...
The key is to, NOT go out of your way. When you go out of your way, you put yourself on HER turf, and you have used energy and resources to get there. Not a good place to be. Very unattractive.
You want her on your turf. Always approach ladies along your path. Think time management, and efficiency.
The key is to, NOT go out of your way. When you go out of your way, you put yourself on HER turf, and you have used energy and resources to get there. Not a good place to be. Very unattractive.
You want her on your turf. Always approach ladies along your path. Think time management, and efficiency.
Thank goodness for my life experience as a door to door salesman that prepared me for day game,it's basically the same damn thing.OP is just scared and has no confidence.Once you get rejected 1000 times it doesn't matter and makes your victories sweet.
IKO69
Master Don Juan
I'll help you with your mental block - I don't know how old you are but think 50-60 years down the line when you are frail and dying. You aren't going to be sad that some ****ing woman rejected you (if that is what ended up happening). Regret is worse than rejection.
DEEZEDBRAH
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There's definitely truth here.
A word of caution. There is going out of your way and there's cowardice.
There's active users here or fellas in pickup, pushing a decade deep, and still have approach anxiety.
That is low testosterone.
Obviously, priorities over women but, my trip this the gym or grocery shopping will include getting baee. At the very least,I will hit on at bare minimum three chicks purely out of sport.
Approach anxiety is sheer cowardice. Its should be weeded out of the gene pool.
Bottom line, the chick is irrelevant. Its about being "that guy." Its about marching to the beat of my drum.
The question being, is it truly going out of your way, as in,detouring from your path in life or is it an excuse masked by cowardice and low testosterone? Most time's then not, its the latter.
DEEZEDBRAH
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99% of the time, its cowardice. Obv, don't flunk out of college or run your biz into the ground due to chasing hoe's.
The sweetest feeler ever: running into women from the past.
You got top form SMV around your arm, I'm talking 18-23. Girl from the past is bulking season run a muck, fat as ****kkk single mom, and children from duff men.
LULZ BE HAD.
I just sit back with that smug look on my face.
Enjoy the ride.
Life trolls women harder then I ever could.
Don't care. Girl power. Lololol
DEEZEDBRAH
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There's no how to. You either are a man and its in your nature or you are cowardice, have low test, and s cuck meaning your genes are weeded out of existence. Its only when the wall hits her that your of use, that being a ATM.
Its a #s game. Hit on everything. Go get baeeee. Its either pull or #nextset! Wash/rinse/repeat.
You're being scared just means some other guys screwing her. I see cucks at the gum following cratered SMV around. Blowing up her ego but getting none.
Step up or step aside.