"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Mental Abuse Card

logicallefty

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Seeking opinions and discussion on the "mental abuse" card.

When a woman says a man is "mentally abusive", what is she really saying?

My own take on it from my own experiences :

- It's a woman saying she is defeated in her own game and is now playing the victim card because everything else she tried has failed.

- She has repeatedly tried any or all of the following and failed including: assert dominance over her man, manipulate him, con him, take advantage of him, lie to him and get caught, steal from him and get caught, etc, etc..

-He has kept his frame and not put up with it.

- Or in simple terms "He mentally abused me" equals "He hasn't put up with my mental abuse".


I post this because I browse PoF and keep seeing woman claim they were mentally abused in the past and don't want it anymore.


I would like your thoughts and opinions gentlemen..
 

"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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skinnyguy

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That's a red flag

Why are you on POF in the first place??
 

TornadoWatch

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As women keep having it better and better they need to become increasingly more aggresive and outlandish to convince men (and perhaps themselves) that they have it bad and deserve reparations.

I think "mental abuse" might be likened to how "rape" is used. Obviously the term is an instrument of power games right now. But that does not mean that there is no such thing as a genuine rape.

In this particular case, when things are stated so openly and upfront, yeah, I'd agree with you.
 

YawataNoKami

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Emotional abuse is a bunch of bullsh1t. People who say they were abused with words are babies and need to grow up.
 

BondAFC

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While the term "mentally-abusive" may have turned into an emotional catch-all, I have "girl-friends" (acquaintances) whose husbands or boy-friends constantly called them "stupid" and belittled them.
He would demean them in private and in front of friends and family.

They put them on an allowance... read their emails... gave them $hit for coming home late after work, complained constantly about the cooking...

Generally they act like controlling jerks 24/7.

One of my friends had a vase of water poured over her while she slept Christmas night because he didn't like the gift she bought him...She still didn't leave him...

These women are typically shy and/or not self-assertive or suffer from poor self-esteem.
This behavior often showed up after the kids arrived so she felt trapped and totally dependent on him.

While they weren't physically abusive (ie. didn't actually hit them), they just brow-beat them constantly.

This isn't about "frame". It's a jerk on a power-trip....
 

"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"

You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.

Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.

Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.

Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.

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