"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Mental Abuse Card

logicallefty

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Seeking opinions and discussion on the "mental abuse" card.

When a woman says a man is "mentally abusive", what is she really saying?

My own take on it from my own experiences :

- It's a woman saying she is defeated in her own game and is now playing the victim card because everything else she tried has failed.

- She has repeatedly tried any or all of the following and failed including: assert dominance over her man, manipulate him, con him, take advantage of him, lie to him and get caught, steal from him and get caught, etc, etc..

-He has kept his frame and not put up with it.

- Or in simple terms "He mentally abused me" equals "He hasn't put up with my mental abuse".


I post this because I browse PoF and keep seeing woman claim they were mentally abused in the past and don't want it anymore.


I would like your thoughts and opinions gentlemen..
 

"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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skinnyguy

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That's a red flag

Why are you on POF in the first place??
 

TornadoWatch

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As women keep having it better and better they need to become increasingly more aggresive and outlandish to convince men (and perhaps themselves) that they have it bad and deserve reparations.

I think "mental abuse" might be likened to how "rape" is used. Obviously the term is an instrument of power games right now. But that does not mean that there is no such thing as a genuine rape.

In this particular case, when things are stated so openly and upfront, yeah, I'd agree with you.
 

YawataNoKami

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Emotional abuse is a bunch of bullsh1t. People who say they were abused with words are babies and need to grow up.
 

BondAFC

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While the term "mentally-abusive" may have turned into an emotional catch-all, I have "girl-friends" (acquaintances) whose husbands or boy-friends constantly called them "stupid" and belittled them.
He would demean them in private and in front of friends and family.

They put them on an allowance... read their emails... gave them $hit for coming home late after work, complained constantly about the cooking...

Generally they act like controlling jerks 24/7.

One of my friends had a vase of water poured over her while she slept Christmas night because he didn't like the gift she bought him...She still didn't leave him...

These women are typically shy and/or not self-assertive or suffer from poor self-esteem.
This behavior often showed up after the kids arrived so she felt trapped and totally dependent on him.

While they weren't physically abusive (ie. didn't actually hit them), they just brow-beat them constantly.

This isn't about "frame". It's a jerk on a power-trip....
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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