Originally posted by iqqi
i don't understand why you are all tripping on this one. all it says it that women appreciate a man who actually listens and remembers important things.
Isn't this true for anyone? Isn't this a requirement?
Because if your ass doesn't even listen to me, your getting the boot. and if you don't even remember my birthday? why would i give a sh!t about you if you don't give a sh!t about me?
You are very correct, but the problem is due to the different intepretation of "nice guy" among women and men.
Ussually (to my observation) women define someone as nice as long as he has the courtesy of not being an azzhole and generally holding down to common rules of conduct.
To men (of lower statute ussually) a nice man is a definition they came up for themselves when they were supplicating. He was buying her flowers every single day, being her shoulder to cry on, never disagreeing with her, putting up with her even when she didn't deserve to, giving her all his attention and money. And in turn he labels the guy who doesn't do all of this "a jerk".
But is he really NICE? Is he doing all this out of real niceness? Truth is he wants to get in her pants, but he's lying to both himself and to her about his true intentions. And then for the sake of consistency a psychological self defense mechanism kicks in: he calls himself NICE - "But I was so NICE to her, I treated her like a princess!". He's only lying to himself here. He isn't any nicer that the guy he labels a jerk. He's just faking it.
So the real debate is really without reason. Since both men and women would agree if they had the same definitions. A nice guy has simply a different meaning in men's and women's dictionaries.
