Let me finally say this: your girl will eventually be imprinted by a man who got it like that and doesn't mind spending some cash on her...just fax my brothers..
I always wonder ( never answered ofcourse) even IF some of you guys get women, you just gonna let a good one walk? So you study game to get a hb8 and then let her walk after one session??? I've never encountered a womam who didn't came back for some more. So you go on a date , spent nun, feck her , and move on? Or you're being persistent on spending none and she just accepts it?
Sound like struggle dating but I don't know..
You gotta understand 2 things to understand the dynamic behind the el cheapo approach to chicks.
1. Men with that attitude are transactional: This for that. They are like hagglers trying to get the most (hopefully sex, woohoo!) for the least investment possible. This transactional haggler energy comes across in the man's vibe on a first in person interaction. It is yucky and a huge turn off.
Example: I remember a guy once (first guy I accepted a date with actually after my divorce... a full year after) who invited me to watch a baseball game in a city with a MLB team. He made it sound like we were going to catch the game at the stadium and get drinks after. Now understand that I am driving 2 hours one way for this outing (sgnificant investment of my time & money & effort) to meet him at all.
My first clue giving me "yuck" energy was he called me as I was getting into town & asked me to drop by his hotel (he said he had gotten a room because he lived far out from the stadium area etc...) So I am thinking "Gee. How weird. Is he a married guy hiding stuff from his wife & I just don't know?" But I figured no biggie he wants to avoid taking 2 cars.
It never crossed my mind that he had presumptously gotten a room expecting sex, although I figured that out pretty quick. I get there, its a nice Residence Inn with outside entries similar to an apartment. So I knock, and he opens the door. He doesn't look ready to go anywhere, and here I am in my jersey and cap looking really cute right?
He invited me in, and had a grocery store cheese tray and a super cheap Wyatt ($5) bottle of spakling wine he wanted to open. I asked if his idea was to pregame (although I'm already pretty creeped out at this point)....
He says no, I thought we'd hang out here and watch the game on TV. So then I knew it was a total bait & switch situation. He didn't have tickets to the ballgame (cheap seats are like $15 each back then). And here I've come all this way, lol.
So I sat in the front room of his Residence Inn, nibbled on grocery store cheddar jack cheese cubes, and watched the game and I drank water (his wine was the cheapest crap which I declined to drink). He got nervous because I wouldn't sit next to him, I stayed in the one person chair, wouldn't go in the bedroom, wouldn't let him near me (but it was an important game I had planned to watch from comfort of my own living room, I actually wanted to watch the game anyway). We had sparse polite conversation about the game, otherwise I was quiet. Once the last out happened, I got up, said thank you and left to drive back home. I got out of there without hugging him or anything else.
He invested in a hotel room expecting sex, obviously. He could have used that money to invest in tickets and getting to know me at the actual game. And tickets would have cost less. Tickets & parking and a couple drinks or a hot dog would have been about break even, and I would have had no problem getting a couple of drinks on my dime after.
So I am thinking: Really? I drive 2 hours one way for Baseball & Chill at your hotel? You presumptous fvck? I was super grossed out by that whole thing.
Hire a damn prositute ffs El Cheapo, Which brings me to point number 2, below.
He blew my phone up for weeks via text when I wouldn't take his calls. He kept asking "What did I do wrong????" I never responded.
2. This is a cheap attitude. Cheap = Stingy = Dried Up Pvssy. Now inexpensive makes sense if you are a teenager or a college student, money is scarce then often times. But if you are a working man and into your 30s or older? You ought to have your act together enough to afford a date better than Netflix & Chill....because your girls worth dating long term or marrying are going to see you as cheap, lacking in generosity and stingy.
And I have gone on a hike for free as a first date before....that is an activity date, so no worries on something like hiking or a tennis match or something like that as an initial interaction. My sister & brother in laws first date was going on a walk, followed by him going to help her several days later cut down a little tree for her Christmas tree; both free interactions.....but my brother in law was generous with his time & effort and brought his tools to help with the tree. Then he helped her get it home & decorated. Inexpensive but an investment of time & effort. Generous in his desire to help her & spend time getting to know her.)
At some point you gotta make an investment gentlemen. Women worth an investment know who they are and are paying attention.
But if you are all about I MUST NOT SPEND ANY MONEY BUT I WANT THE COOKIE?????
Good women will steer clear of that. These are both total turn off attitudes guys exude in this rigid idea that you are somehow owed something.
You are men. If you want yo be treated like men by worthwhile women you gotta quit whining about this sort of rhetorical stuff and accept that it is part of being man. You don't like that? Ok. Some other guy will get the hotties who are worthwhile women because they are happy to be the man in the interaction.
Good women sniff out cheap and/or transactional behavior & get away from it.
