Mega Post 1 of 3: GameKillers

[Snow Plowman]

This is almost everything that I can think of that can mess up your game up...usually I don't like posting negatives but I think this will make more people aware of what there doing wrong because there are MANY guys on this forum who still don't get it...It's sad...

You got guys who've been on here for years and are still virgins, you got guys still asking the same old questions...so this can help solve many problems...Everything I'm mentioning is from notes, stuff I learned, personal experiences and stuff I did to help get past things...

Outcome Dependence
These are the guys who are too attached to the outcome of the interaction, they read too much into the interaction and they care too much about it. There emotionally attached. Before they even talk to the girl there thinking about wanting her #, before they even call her there hoping for a day2, on the day2 there just thinking about getting sex. These are the guys who can't even talk and enjoy the interaction because there so focused on the outcome that they can't even enjoy the process. The need the #, they need the sex, they must get the outcome that they came in for...

Example: I have a wing who used to be very outcome dependent...every time he spoke to chicks they'd realize he's reaching for an outcome. I remember one time he was trying to get a # and he tried 3-4 different ways then he just says "Tell me your # if I remember it then it was ment to be". This particular wing used to always say he wants to get a few more #s before eating even if he had 2 or 3 new #s...he's had over 150 #s...less than 10 day2s...a mixture of fakes, #s that surely weren't going to followup, etc.

Solution: Abundance mentality...You don't care about the outcome because you don't need no specific girl and you know there are many of women. So you have a take it or leave it attitude...If you and her hook up cool...if not cool...you didn't really care at all if anything happened.


Women on Pedestal
Many guys think women are higher value than them...guys could've saved lives, invented something major, and even CURE cancer. But put that guy in a club and some 22 year old high school drop out who is dressed up can have more value than him. Men are always putting women above them and they don't even realize it. Guys buy and do stuff in hopes of winning a woman over. The guys always think she is higher value because they see that many guys want her. Most guys treat women like goddesses...

Example: I remember a chick passing by me who had just walked out of a restaurant and 15 men come rushing out just to watch her walk off in the night...SAD

Solution: Realize you both have equal value, she is a human just like you. She vomits, piss, smells, farts, etc...just like you. You should always think of yourself as high value because of who you are...not because your good looking or have some expensive car.

Identity Issues
These are guys who have no clue who they are and has society dictating there identity or other people around them. This is very common and I've rarely met guys who have grounded Identities unless they've put in the effort of building from the ground up. They have no sense of self and so they do not move to the beat of there own drum instead there trying to follow someone else's drum...This is VERY COMMON...Guys thinking they need to go on x amount of dates to have sex, thinking they have to ask a chick out, think money and looks matters. Trying to live up to a chicks expectation or better yet societies value system.

Example: I knew a guy who's identity was like a leaf in the wind that can blow wherever because he wasn't centered. If someone said something about him he'd be affected, if a woman gave him good reactions he'd feel good and if she gave him bad reactions he'd feel bad to the point where he'd want to go home. This guy would have an experience and dwell on it trying to find out how people seen him in that moment and go deep into the other people's opinions and then wonder how they could live up to the other people's expectation...

Solution: BUILD YOUR OWN IDENTITY...
- Who are you?
- What are your values?
- What do you want out of life?
- What makes you unique?
- What are your boundaries?
- What are you grateful for?
- What makes you different?
- Where do you stand in relation to other people?
- What makes you who you are?
- What gives you a certain status relative to others?
- What kind of women you deserve?
- Do you like yourself?
- Would you hangout with someone like yourself?
- If you saw a guy like you with an attractive girl would you e like "What's that about?" or "Of course he's with her"?

Ingeniune
Agreeing to everything trying to make it seem like you have a connection with the girl. Guys saying one thing when they know full well they mean something different just for the sake of getting the girl. They would do things and say things just because they think it would get them what they want.

Example: I remember going out playing around with direct because when I'd go in direct chicks would go super submissive and so I wanted to bring back going in direct, so I can just sweep the women off there feet...only problem there weren't many attractive women that I'd actually go direct to, but I really wanted to play around with it so I went in direct on chicks I clearly wasn't attracted too...and I got blown out 7 times in a row in less than 2mins...

Solution: Be HONEST...and act through your own intentions...just do it because you wanted to do it. If you dislike something don't say you like it, that way if you really do like something it will be legit and you will actually find something in common

Friend Zone
So many guys DO NOT ESCALATE FROM THE START...the longer you wait to escalate the creeper it will be when you try to do it later, so many guys try to hide there interest as if indirect means be gay and keep your hands to yourself.

Example: I year ago...I had a friend who was a virgin who met this chick...a month passed and he hadn't escalated or even tried to have sex...I told him he was done and that he'd never have sex with her, he laughed it off...a year and a half had passed and NOTHING had ever happened, they remained friends...he tried to jump on another chick but the same thing happened they were just friend's because he never expressed his interests...It was sad...even though eventually he hung out my natural friends and got himself a gf...

Solution: ESCALATE from the start of the conversation, you are a guy who naturally touches women and like to be comfy with touching, you also express your interest and let her know you have a divk. Look at her while thinking about every position you can put her in...

 

[Snow Plowman]

Generic Approach
This is one ANNOYS me the most because a lot of guys do this...they most likely meet through friends/school/work and make casual talk, eventually they exchange #s and sooner or later hangout. After a couple of dates they finally kiss, and then sex. Or they do the most chodely thing ever ASK to go out with a chick and put it in the bf/gf courtship frame. It's needy, boring and no sexual tension...but she logically screens the guy until she's ready...the most typical generic date is movie then dinner date... (This doesn't mean you can't do it, it's where your coming from)

Example: Basically any regular guy that doesn't focus on this area and just casually goes about his life...they meet a chick through social circle, over time the chick sees his personality and then eventually they start dating and after awhile sex will happen. The more bold guys do BOLD moves knowing they'll get blown out but do it to atleast say they approached her when really they knew they were going to get blown out which is why they did it...

Solution: Learn to express who you are freely...bring your own spice to the interaction whatever that maybe. This is when attraction happens fast and the woman is loving it because your sweeping her off her feet. She wants sex badly because she is feeling the intense sexual tension and she wants your validation. Instead of logically screening you, she has emotionally chosen you and logically analyze the choice she just made in a manner that rationalizes her emotional choice as making sense. Women like men who stand out, not fit in...

Logically Convincing
Guys do this a lot too, trying to convince and persuade a chick, not realizing that logic is bad and cuts off the flow of sub-communication. As if an interaction is some formal business plan and trying to explain it to her when she wants to live in the moment and have fun.

Example: A wing of mine who used to always try and convince girls to give him there # after they've said no right before they started trying all these different ways "You really should give me your #", "Tell me your # if I remember then it was destiny", etc.

Solution: If the chick says no or doesn't want to do anything, just change her mood because they live in the moment so whatever emotion there in they'll run with it. If there saying no, you can get them giggling, laughing and having a great time and then try again and they'll be into it..

Oneitis
This is a HUGE amount of guys problems...they focus and try and get one specific girl. As if they can even get a few women, there trying to pinpoint one chick and get it. They put so much emotional thought and energy into trying to get her to the point where they can't meet anyone else because they want this one chick so bad. They post on the forum asking for tips on how to get this ONE "SPECIFIC" chick as if she is the last girl on planet. This chicks usually have this guys in there palm whether they know it or not because there so emotionally invested because they act like they have no other options...

Examples: A wing of mine I met up with...he was with a girl who's been playing games with him for 10 years now. She clearly had him in his pocket because he wouldn't dear talk to other chicks, if he tried touching her she'd throw congruence tests, he couldn't handle her. He coined her "Crazy" because he has no clue what to do and he is so invested...almost as if he improved himself just to go back to this girl and get her...

Solution: LEARN TO GET WOMEN IN GENERAL...so many posts on this forum is about one specific girl...if you knew how to get women in general then you'd know how to get that one specific girl. There may be certain situations that arise that involves a specific scenario, but so many guys say "How can I get my ex back", "There is this girl in my class that I want", "This is a good girl, I don't want to **** it up"...man if you could get women in general then you'd be able to get those specific girls.

Stuck In Head
These are many guys who just can't chill...they either have routines queued up or doing negative self-talk to talk themselves out of a situation. They think about past experiences or try to think ahead analyzing how everyone will respond. They can't just chill, maybe they got blown out in the past and thinking of what might happen if they approach this girl. Or there trying to think of there opener and what they'll say right after the opener in order to keep up in the conversation...when there isn't even a conversation. They are wondering what responses they'll get if they do or say certain things.

Example: I have a wing who used to always be stuck in his head and you could tell because that is when the chicks face would change stating "Your done"...At times it would be hard for him to approach because he'd be saying "No man she's on the phone, what if she blows me out, she's too hot, she's moving to fast" or thinking ahead, you can tell because his rhythm isn't flowing it's choppy, even his touch can come off awkward because he tried to think before he did it.

Solution: LIVE IN THE MOMENT...let the interaction unfold moment by moment and don't try to reach for ahead...the only time is now, so don't be interacting and trying to think of what to say 10mins down the line or something. You must be present and all the right things will come to you.

Reactive
Basically anytime your reactive your handing your power away and giving her higher value. This usually stems from identity issues because they have the woman dictating to them who they are. So they do stuff not because they want to but because something the chick did. A chick will say something about them and they will stand there trying to logically convince the woman otherwise and justify herself. Things the chick does is affecting the guy and causing him to do things that he wouldn't otherwise do.

Example: A wing of mine was with me and we spot a HOT chick that I had seen earlier but lost track of where she went, my wing spoke to her weeks ago and even # closed. He yells her name, runs over there and starts talking. He is totally reacting to her because comes by us few mins after he came back to me and he says something trying to call her over. She sits by us and he is trying to take her phone for no reason as she calls him a jerk and *******. I can see on his face he is totally affected. Then he gives back her phone walks off and is very uneasy as if he has no clue what to do. Some alpha guy grabs her slams her on the wall and just chats with her, my wing is done and he acts like he isn't affected but he was reactive the whole time. A week later he told me he was driving his car and was so AFFECTED by the things she did...

Solution: Deep Identity level change...become centered and grounded that way stuff doesn't just cause you to drop your identity and start reacting to the woman by making her dictate what you do. You will know what I mean when your actually grounded and centered and watching other people be reactive.

Trying To Impress
The quickest way to break the vibe and kill the whole interaction. So many guys are quick to talk about what superficial things they got, or things they did in hopes of wooing her over to you. Many guys buy cars thinking it will impress women, dressing up thinking it will impress women. A lot of stuff people get or do in order to try and impress women...why do you think sex sells.

Example: I remember back when I first started my friends were telling me I couldn't get women unless I dress well and had a car. Everytime we'd hang out they'd see things and say "Damn now your going to get lots of pusvy" as if those stuff would really help.

Solution: Don't bring things up unless your wing is bragging about you or if it relates to something your talking about. Me personally I never say I'm an actor unless they ask what I do or if I'm telling her a story about my day. I try very hard to not talk about any things that can come off as trying to impress because I'm coming from the frame of having fun and I don't need to tell them I'm an actor in order to have fun...

Giving Your Power Away
These are the guys who are in there head trying to think of the next thing to say. They tend to always try to relate what you have to say with what she's saying. This is a very subtle reactive thing. A chick would be talking and instead of just listening the guy would be figuring out what to say next and trying to relate it to what was just said.

Example: I used to talk to chicks and as they were speaking I'd be thinking about what to say next to the point where I'd forget the chick's name after the next sentence. When I fixed this habit I still had the habit of not being able to listen and I once forgot a chicks name 6 times one sentence after the next...talk about ADD...before when I wasn't dictating the interaction I used to try and relate to everything she was saying and it didn't come off well...

Solution: LISTEN! LISTEN! LISTEN! Take in the sound, energy, the resonation, her facial expressions when she speaks, the pace, tempo, etc. Just freaking listen and stop trying to think ahead...

 

[02hero]

Good stuff

 

[Cassanova_Child]

damn good stuff.... i have a bit of the last one, need to stamp it out of me quiickly.

 

[Chronocidal]

Outcome Dependence
These are the guys who are too attached to the outcome of the interaction, they read too much into the interaction and they care too much about it...These are the guys who can't even talk and enjoy the interaction because there so focused on the outcome that they can't even enjoy the process.

Solution: Abundance mentality...You don't care about the outcome because you don't need no specific girl and you know there are many of women. So you have a take it or leave it attitude...If you and her hook up cool...if not cool...you didn't really care at all if anything happened.

I have this issue, but I've had a hell of a time using those types of solutions in the past. What if most attempts at interacting aren't inherently enjoyable in and of themselves, or are generally negative experiences without the positive outcome? As for abundance, what if one is in a situation where women themselves may exist in some number but women who give one even the proverbial time of day are not abundant?

 

[Solomon]

This needs to be archived ASAP

Coulda used this 6 months ago but I learned lol

 

[Scars]

Not gonna lie, I saw the name "Snow Plowman" attached to this thread and got a little excited. You're truly an inspiration, at least to me. This sh!t is bible worthy. You addressed a lot of things, even things I have overlooked myself. I hope the other guys read this and learn a thing or two, I know I realized I have an outcome dependency problem as well as a "reactive" problem; as much as I hate to admit it. Definitely a few things I could work on. Great post.

+1

 

[flint]

Great post man. The sad part about the post is that the way you wrote it makes it easy for people to identify which one they are suffering from.

 

[undunk]

Mega Post 1 of 3 GameKillers

Im actually surprisingly excited about it ... Id lost interest in RATM by the time they broke up, and I thought Chris Cornell was dead or a Buddhist monk or something. But the stuff Ive heard on the radio Cochise, I believe? sounds really, really good.

 

[Amazing]

Very solid post, love the identity part, I believe it is the most important and everything goes from there.

Props. keep it up

 

[Dubh]

I agree with everything but it is a must to dress well when meeting women because it shows that you care about your self

 

[Jordie]

Excellent post. I used to have all of these traits and was always :nervous: during each conversation.