"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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Meeting her parents on first date

supCALI

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Got a first date tomorrow with a girl who's 19 and lives with her parents. I told her I'd pick her up and when I did I forgot that she still lives at her parents' house.

Don't really want to deal with meeting her parents and dealing with any of their qualifications/interrogations just yet. I was going to either text or call her about 30 minutes before I left to let her know when I'm on my way. Should I tell her I'll call when I pull up, and then once I get there just walk up to the door and wait for her? Or do I need to go up and knock to let everyone know I'm there?

Hoping she's already figured this out and just comes out the door when I call her to let her know I'm there...
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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JohnChops

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supCALI said:
Got a first date tomorrow with a girl who's 19 and lives with her parents. I told her I'd pick her up and when I did I forgot that she still lives at her parents' house.

Don't really want to deal with meeting her parents and dealing with any of their qualifications/interrogations just yet. I was going to either text or call her about 30 minutes before I left to let her know when I'm on my way. Should I tell her I'll call when I pull up, and then once I get there just walk up to the door and wait for her? Or do I need to go up and knock to let everyone know I'm there?

Hoping she's already figured this out and just comes out the door when I call her to let her know I'm there...
How old are you? Just meet her parents, are you not friendly? Being good with her parents could increase your value in her eyes. Not wanting to meet her parents may be a red flag to HER.

Just call her and say you're here, she'll come to the door. Invite you in, and you meet her parents. Then go on the date. Have fun.
 

Purefilth

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What John said.

I'm awesome with parents. They love me- fathers not so much, but mothers love me to bits. ;)
 

Uncharted

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Agree with all of the above. If her parents like you, it's kind of an "acceptance" for her - it's like a social value increase. All good for you.
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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Sesar

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Show them that you are a Man n u can take care of her Daughter! :D
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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VladPatton

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I was ambushed into doing this when I was 19 by some chick, not once but twice. Had to pick her up and say hello to the dad before we left. Big deal, man, just say hello, be confident and grab his daughter and jet. No biggie. We all wanna be manly men like in the 40's and 50's...well, this is the kinda ʂhit
you gotta go through.
 

casaanova

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Just be cordial.

I will never understand fathers that give the whole interrogation spiel to guys their daughters are dating, as if it will actually change anything. At 19 years old your daughter will be doing whatever she wants to do, whether you know about it or not. You should've nipped that in the bud before she even got to middle school; everything you say after that point won't hold any weight
 

pdx1138

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casaanova said:
Just be cordial.

I will never understand fathers that give the whole interrogation spiel to guys their daughters are dating, as if it will actually change anything. At 19 years old your daughter will be doing whatever she wants to do, whether you know about it or not. You should've nipped that in the bud before she even got to middle school; everything you say after that point won't hold any weight

You probably don't have a daughter of your own.

(I don't either, but I understand it from others who do)
 

casaanova

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pdx1138 said:
You probably don't have a daughter of your own.

(I don't either, but I understand it from others who do)
Nope, sure don't. But I grew up with sisters and dated girls like this, not to mention that I have common sense. If I ever do have a daughter I know at some point I'd have to put my ego to the side and think logically about how to educate her about dating - VERY early on. Yelling at her at 18 when it's time for her to go to off to college is way too late and will only make it worse - I've seen this happen time and time again
 

Sik

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supCALI,

I've done this many times.

Dress classy. Arrive at her house at the designated time. Park out front. Walk up to the door and knock like a man. Introduce yourself to whoever answers.

"Hey, I'm supCALI. I'm here to pickup Slampiece for our movie/go karts/bowling."

They'll invite you in and you can have a nice chat while you wait for Slampiece. Be confident. Know a current global/national event so there's something to talk about.

Grab the girl when she's ready and roll out like you have important stuff to do.

Also, shake hands with the father like a man and look him in the eye. Don't have weak, sorry excuse for a handshake or you'll look like a weak and sorry excuse for a man.

Let us know how it goes. Godspeed, man!
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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Bokanovsky

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Why can't you just text her from the car and say 'I'm here" and wait for her to come out?
 
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