"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Meeting Girls You Don't Know.

Tony197

Don Juan
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So yeah, with social media you see tons of attractive women who are "Friends of Friends", but because of the creep-factor, you can't just randomly message them without being "guy who randomly Friends and messages girls on FB"...so what to do?

I'll provide an example I'd like specific advice on:

Cute blonde who I went to high school with, but we never talked. From what I can tell, we'd be pretty compatible. I'd like to meet her. We have several mutual friends. Do I -

1.) Send Friend Request and be "Random FB messenger guy"?
2.) Ask a Friend of a Friend to introduce?

And yes, I am and will continue to talk to other girls, but what is a good strategy for actually meeting this specific one, and girls you don't know in general?
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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Roober

Master Don Juan
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Sounds like the beginning of oneitis...

However, send her a friend request. Build quick rapport, then ask on a date... pretty simple!
 

Killakittie

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Sometimes i just send a friend request then poke her a few times before sending a message. I also check her profile out and if she has "single" clearly displayed shes usually good for at least messaging. I've never really used FB for hooking up but i did get a girls number last week so we'll see how it goes.
 

Ratiocinative

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I don't see anything wrong with messaging her. Just send a message referencing the fact you went to high school together in case she doesn't remember.

Just don't say anything needy like "oh hey I was looking through friends of friends and I thought you were cute but was too afraid to ask you out in school" or anything like that. Just say something to bring up something funny or nostalgic from school and go from there.

Meeting strangers, especially women is a lot more difficult than meeting someone you know, but still doable. You just need to establish a commonality and school is a big one. Having a conversation with a woman is normal. Asking a woman out when you've established nothing in common with simply because she is hot is probably going to come off as creepy.
 

The Duke

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Unless you are very attractive, I would go with #2. It never worked for me. I hear girls complain about this all the time.
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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Glassguy

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Many on here think fb is not a good pool to swim in for dates. I disagree for several reasons:

1.) I have well over 1000 friends on there. Many are single women.

2.) I have access to pictures and other important info that I use to determine if I'm interested. Also able to see what they like to do which is later used for convo starters.

3.) Many mutual friends so it's easy to build rapport and comfort in conversation.


Don't be creepy about it and send the message. You'll know right away if she is interested. Intentionally leave the conversation open and see if she steps in to keep it going. Lots of opportunity on fb if you play your cards rot and be cool about it. Most importantly, don't move at warp speed. Play it cool before asking her out and build attraction.
 
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