Originally posted by Jet Jockey
I have met a few from the internet..there are some things to keep in mind when doing this!
1. They could be married or in a LTR with someone else. Because of the convenience of the internet they can hop on and hop off so fast hubby doesn't know what they are up to. You have to be real careful here..or you could get your head smashed in by a pizzed off husband.
This is possible but all in all its unlikely that more than a fraction of a percentage of women fall into this category. The easiest way to find out is to determine if she is seriously interested. The best way to find out is if she agrees to meet you withing a reasonable amount of time.
2. There are a few that will lie about things. Looks, job, etc.
I find more women to be more so deceptive online than outright lie (at least the adults). If they won't give you a straight answer, be wary. Meeting them will take care any concern about looks. As for her job, does it really matter?[/b]
3. If they can meet you this way..then beware if there IL slips abit....guess what they often do then...go back online looking for your replacement. These woman are usually computer savvy and know where to go to look for guys, and many get a thrill from it. many are nothing but attention wh@res, who like to see how many guys the can have a convo with at once.
This is true, another reason to get them away from the computer and interact with them face to face. This way you will be able to tell if she can walk the walk as well as she talks the talk.
You need to if at all possible chat with them, and view their webcam if they have one. That is always a plus, cuz it shows what they look like TODAY not 10 years ago.
Get the phone #. Call them briefly. This lets you know they are not some 40 year old fat guy, and also you can call, later, at a diffrent time and if a guy answers, you probably don't want them! Be sure to make your call where it won't show on caller ID if you can.
I think all of this is a waste of time. This is what AFCs do because it is safer (less chance of rejection) than meeting face to face. If they are serious about meeting people, it will not take long for them to agree to meet.
If they insist on 'taking it slow,' it is a tell tale sign that they are afraid or unsure and will need a lot of reassurance. You need to ask yourself if you are willing to put in the extra time without any assurances.
Meet them first at a convenient public place. If you like em, go on back to your place. If not, tell them you need to go and don't contact again. Best way I can think of to sort them out.
Definitely meet them someplace public and don't worry about impressing them with dinner, movies or the sort, coffee will do just fine. If things go well, play it cool and DO NOT PLAY ALL OF YOUR CARDS UNLESS YOU ARE HOPING FOR A ONS!!! How long do you think a woman will be interested if you show her everything at once?
If they have a public profile and you do end up being with them in a LTR..look it up and see if they have changed there status from "single" to In a LTR. If thru some oversight they have not, ask em how come? You can use what they are telling the rest of the world as a sort of gauge to figure out if they are straight with you. If they resist changing it..you probably ought to next them, they are still looking!
This could be good advise or you could accidentally burn yourself. If you are in a LTR with someone, you should be able to tell whether they are still in a dating mode by watching their actions through clear glasses.
Checking the web site could be a good idea but it is possible that
she was on several sites and may not remember to pull herself from all of them. Just watch her actions, don't feel that you need to follow her tracks, that's VERY AFC.
Sometime when you are over at their place and they have their messenger up and running...casually notice the kinds of people on the friends list. Don't be blatant, just casually notice. If it is all guys, thats a red flag.... Not ALL of their friends should be guys. If they are, its a sure sign you are sharing them with someody!
This is VERY AFC. DJs do not care about who her friends are. What matters is that you are better than the rest of them. If you are and she realizes it, why not have her chat with her AFC buds.
If you are on your game, it will just reinforce that she is lucky to be with you. Only scared AFCs worry about how they stack up to other guys.
If you are hitting it off good, and seeing each other, also notice how much time thay spend online. if they seem to be there no matter when you pop on, chances are thats what they do all day...and eventually they are going to find a guy and talk to him like they did you, flirt and the guy is going to want to meet them. If a attention wh@re thats real bad news for you.
Don't make assumptions about why women do things, they do not think like men. If you are concerned about what they are doing, just ask! If she is always available, just ask her what she does while she is waiting for you. If she is always on the computer, ask what she does. Don't assume, more times than not you will be thinking the worse.
It can be done..i know couples that are married because of the net, but you have to approach it with some street smarts and savvy. Don't believe it til you see it, then pinch yourself for good measure!
I completely agree...
