"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."
Attraction runs on a clock.
She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.
The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."
One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.
Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.
Meeting an 18yo girl tonight
- Thread starter ER!C L!VE
- Start date
"Nervous Around Beautiful Women? There's a Rule for That"
I could talk to any woman I wasn't attracted to. Charming, funny, relaxed. Then a gorgeous woman looked my way and I'd become a sweating, babbling mess.
The fix took me years to find and ten minutes to learn. Nervousness and excitement are the same physical state — pounding heart, adrenaline, flushed face. Your brain just picks the label. And you can pick a better one.
Rule 16 shows you how. You feel the nerves, relabel them as excitement, and let that energy pour out as enthusiasm. Women notice the guy radiating it. They always do.
PuertoRican_Lover
Banned
What?? Because she is 18?? This makes it immoral and valueless. 90% of dudes on this board are screwing 15-18 year olds but because this ho accepts a man 12 years her senior it makes it immoral? Huh? Immorall because of 12 year age difference?? They are a man and a woman of legal age - he is the pimp and she is the ho! Eric is doing his job!!
The age difference isn't what really bothers me. It's this part that bothers me. It's a form of lying and I hate liars. I have no respect for a man who would lie or deceive a woman of any age just to get her into the sack. I find it especially sickening when a man of 30 years would use this kind of deception on a girl who isn't really old enough to understand those kinds of games. Do men forget that younger girls emotions are not exsactly stable and that sex is an emotional thing for most women?
Seduction when everyone knows the score is fine by me, but men using these kinds of games to get sex have no right to complain about the games women play.
ShortTimer
Banned
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What exactly is this "form of lying"? I don't remember anywhere in his post where he said he was telling the girl fabrications to get her nekkid.
Could have fooled me. Here let me fix your quote: "sex is a weapon for most women, and they use it against men." There, that's much better.
PuertoRican_Lover
Banned
As ShortTimer has done I feel an urge to fix a quote!
"You've had 17 years to teach her the kind of woman to be".
Either she is a decent woman or a hor! This girl is a hor by her own doing!!
Why make Eric to be a monster when the hor went after him on the internet and didn't even know him!!!
Water-tigress, this girl isn't looking for reassurances or promises or committment - in fact she asked Eric for NOTHING. She was seeking sex and nothing else - no guile was involved!!!
"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"
You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.
And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.
Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.
The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.
"Act as if there are going to be many other dates ... "
It's not a bald face lie but it is deceptive. It's passive aggressive behaviour at that. A get out of jail card free, if you will. Someone with integrity would never "act as if" anything. They would be upfront about what is what. Of course those lacking integrity would use it as a get out of jail free card.
I'll admit that some women use sex as a weapon, but just as many men have little to no understanding about how women are actually wired. If I'm pissed off at my partner about something it can ruin the mood for me completly. Why should I bother having sex when I know that at best I won't enjoy it and at worse I'll resent him for being able to enjoy it when I can't.
Sex is supposed to be about two people enjoying each other. It's not about obligation or satisfying one persons needs. Expecting a woman to have sex with you for any other reason than because she wants to have sex with you, is expecting too much.
Walden
Master Don Juan
He wants there to be other dates. The assuming there will be others is to appear confident in the face of a dubious and challenging situation.
Try to pay attention.
GirlCrazy
Master Don Juan
In sales it's called "assuming the sale".
It's not morally wrong, it's just being optimistic. If I'm the PRIZE, then why is it wrong to assume that she will be wanting more of me?
Come down off your high horse, Eileen. If our attitudes are such an affront to your moral values, then why are you here? Are you going to change us? Maybe make honest men out of us?
white sox bill
Senior Don Juan
Eileen claims Eric is taking advantage of this 18 yr old and that she isn't street wise to such games. With all due respect to Eileen, this girl's probably seen everything by the time she was 16. They grow up faster now. 'Nuff said. Eileen also said she'd knne him in the groin if that were her daughter. Can't say I have kids, so I really can't realte to that. We all have our self-serving situations in life, nothing differnt here. The fact is that Eric is single, unattached and on the prowl. Just like her. Let nature take its course. These are two consenting adults.
The shear reality of dating an 18 yr old--I know I was in Eric's shoes quite a few yrs back. Will he have conversations regarding social problems of Third World Countries? No. Will they talk about Instellular Astronomy as it relates to Newtoian Physics? Probably not. Who cares? They are to satisfy urges, not have intelluctual conversations.
Good luck to Eric and PRL in their honarable quests!
Bill
gentleman193
Don Juan
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DL move = IGNORE
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
Dearest Walden,
What on earth could a 30 year old man have in common with an 18 year old girl? Smacks of immaturity and a sever lack of self-esteem to me.
Face it, he's in it for the nookie and nothing else. Which I wouldn't find so disturbing if the girl was a little older. The line between adult fun and sexual predator isn't a thin one. Does he steal candy from babies and trip old ladies too?
white sox bill - I'm not an American (though I do live here now) so your theory about not having this discussion any other place doesn't ring true.
Walden
Master Don Juan
[sound of walden banging his head against the computer screen]
WaterTiger
Master Don Juan
Eileen, Eileen, Eileen....
Of course he's in it for the "nookie", what you seem to be missing is she's probably in it for the sex as well. Why go to bed with fumbling teenage boys, when you've got a 30 year old man who actually knows what the fvck he's doing? (pun intended
) Don't imagine that she's some innocent babe with no mind of her own.It's not like he kidnapped her from the local convent, begiled her with lies of love & promises of marriage, got her drunk, took her virginity then dumped her back at the convent in time for Sunday vespers! (You didn't do that, did you Eric?
) SHE IS OF AGE OF CONSENT! HE'S NOT PUTTING A GUN TO HER HEAD! A sexual predator? DAAAAAAMMMN! And he thought I was harsh for calling him an idiot!
JEEEEEZE! I had this same fight with MY parents when I was 18! I brought home a 28 year old guy & they had a FIT! The ONLY reason that we stayed together as long as we did was because my parents kept insisting that I break up with him.
They'll get bored with each other and move on.
In my experience, those who believe themselves worthy to judge the lifestyles of others are usually the least qualified to do so.
It seems from your posts that you have a romanticized view of young women, and a suspicious and cynical view of men. That may comfortably fit your world view and past experience, but bears little resemblance to reality.
Sometimes sex is just sex. Not all young women want it to mean something and not all men have to lie to them in order to have sex with them.
You assumed that "act like there'll be more dates" meant deceive her into thinking she'll be seeing this guy more. Coming from a cynical and suspicious perspective, it makes sense you would think this.
Coming from a perspective of understanding of how anxious-making a date can be for a guy of any age, and how that can affect our presence on the date, then the statement takes on a new meaning about reducing anxiety and being able to have more fun on the date. But this was explained to you already in another post. You seemed to skip over that and move onto something else you didn't like.
I think train-spotting and stamp-collecting are a huge waste of time and I don't understand why anyone would want to do such a thing. However, I don't waste my own time hunting down forums dedicated to those hobbies in order to tell the people there that they should give it up and do something more productive. I have better things to do and enough self-awareness to know that just because I don't like something, doesn't mean I have to make other people not like it too.
"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."
Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.
Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?
You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.
Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.
ShortTimer
Banned
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So you did it for the hot throbbing c0ck eh? I need to meet some 18 year olds like that.