Meeting a cougar from POF tonight, but getting wierd vibe? Thoughts?

[-E-]

Hey all,

I'm meeting up with a 42 year old Cougar tonight that messaged me on POF. Even though I'm 34 I still consider her to be a cougar in relation to me... lol. But I'm not sure what to think about her. Here's the dealy --

She messaged me on POF last week telling me I was cute. We got a conversation going where she kept calling me cute and funny, but on Wednesday her personality changed all of the sudden after I responded to a text of hers. She sent me the following text:

"Hi -E-, thx 4 callin last nite - u text much? I just wanted 2 say hi..."

To which I replied:

"Hey there yeah I am bad at texting lol. thx 4 saying hi tho "

After that she simply replied with "K" and that was the last I heard from her. I texted her today (6 days later) asking her about her weekend, etc. and she promptly replied to each text but with more an attitude of disinterest. But when I asked her about meeting up this week she quickly agreed and wanted to meet tonight, so we set up a date.

I guess I'm confused because after that text session I described, her attitude seemed to go from "He's so cute and funny!" to "Whatever..." yet she wants to meet.

What the hell do I make of this? LOL.

*sigh* WOMEN...

 

[SandHawk]

I think you're forgetting that plain text only contains about between 2% and 10% of the actual communication. Without body language, intonation and facial expressions you are projecting your personal feelings/guts on whatever you read.

Even with smilies, you won't exceed the 10% of it, because most of the actual conversational stuff comes from how you say it. She's eager to meet, but since she got you hooked already, she dropped the whole "you're so cute" act, since she got your attention.

 

[-E-]

Thanks for the input.

The other thing that throws me is I talked to her over the phone a little bit ago to finalize the date, and as we were hanging up at the end I said "I'm look forward to it!" and she simply said "Bye" and hung up after that.

I almost feel like a chick for reading so much into things, but was it bad for me to say that? LOL. Only one way for me to learn I guess...

 

[Kailex]

Thanks for the input.

The other thing that throws me is I talked to her over the phone a little bit ago to finalize the date, and as we were hanging up at the end I said "I'm look forward to it!" and she simply said "Bye" and hung up after that.

I almost feel like a chick for reading so much into things, but was it bad for me to say that? LOL.

Yes.
She should be the one saying that... not you.
You don't know this girl, so why are you looking forward to it?

Just treat them indifferently, like it's just another day in your life and not some huge event that'll turn your life around.

 

[-E-]

Yes.
She should be the one saying that... not you.
You don't know this girl, so why are you looking forward to it?

Just treat them indifferently, like it's just another day in your life and not some huge event that'll turn your life around.

I don't even know why I said it. It just sort of popped out on it's own. Maybe auto-AFC behaviors from the past resurfacing? I guess it's a good thing that I don't really care how things turn out tonight... lol. I was indifferent during the rest of the conversation though.

This is just practice for me really. Gotta smooth out the wrinkles and get rid of the kinks.

 

[Daddy The Pimp]

you should be more challenging, playful, dominant and indifferent.

keep in mind, she's an old overused machine. Don't put her into your pedestal.

 

[Naughty Ninja]

Congrats on the Cougar! Continue to leave it up. The texting convo seems a little childish for her age. But whatever. I would never have said "look foward to meeting you" especially since being online makes you seem desperate for a date to begin with..lol You'll get more off the P.O.F E. Good luck!

 

[-E-]

LOL she just cancelled on me. I was expecting it for some reason. She sent me 2 texts, I replied, and she replied once again, as follows:

Her - "I may have to cancel for tonight. I'm sorry."
Her again - "I'll let u know ASAP."

Me - "Don't worry about it, we can do it some other time."

Her - "Ok thank you. I will text you. Dealin w home repairs."

I guess that's that. I'm not going to text her again unless she texts me first. Didn't really feel like meeting her tonight anyway, so no skin off my back... lol. It's very liberating to honestly truly not give a crap.

 

[-E-]

She just sent me another one -

"Im very sorry -i hate to cancel..but will be in touch. Have a good evening. "

Maybe she's being honest but I don't really care anyway, so whatevs...

 

[Naughty Ninja]

E, Don't reply back.

Let her text you back. And still don't reply. Let her wonder if she F'd up. If she never does....keep it moving..

Keep going for more Fish. I had to drop alot of weird ones off there. I keep it moving. You should have never replied to her cancellation in the first place. She would've either kept texting you to see if you got the original "cancellation" or called like a 42 year old woman should do. She's obviously trying to turn you into some orbiting chump to boost her wounded ego. I've already had like five girls email or send pics of them to my phone after getting their numbers. I either don't respond and let them sweat it out or reply with "Thanks. That's cute of you. Really." and not respond to their reply.

Keep emailing with a ****y funny copy and paste email to a bunch of ones that look good.

Then talk about random B.S.,

then get phone numbers like the next day or so depending on how the convo's go.

Then get facebook's Why? To see more pictures of them and see if they aren't a tub o lard, crazy, etc.

 

[-E-]

E, Don't reply back.

Let her text you back. And still don't reply. Let her wonder if she F'd up. If she never does....keep it moving..

Keep going for more Fish. I had to drop alot of weird ones off there. I keep it moving. You should have never replied to her cancellation in the first place. She would've either kept texting you to see if you got the original "cancellation" or called like a 42 year old woman should do. She's obviously trying to turn you into some orbiting chump to boost her wounded ego. I've already had like five girls email or send pics of them to my phone after getting their numbers. I either don't respond and let them sweat it out or reply with "Thanks. That's cute of you. Really." and not respond to their reply.

Keep emailing with a ****y funny copy and paste email to a bunch of ones that look good.

Then talk about random B.S.,

then get phone numbers like the next day or so depending on how the convo's go.

Then get facebook's Why? To see more pictures of them and see if they aren't a tub o lard, crazy, etc.

Will do mang. I haven't replied to her last 2 and don't plan on it. Thanks for all the advice bro.

 

[lakeshore]

LOL she just cancelled on me. I was expecting it for some reason. She sent me 2 texts, I replied, and she replied once again, as follows:

Her - "I may have to cancel for tonight. I'm sorry."
Her again - "I'll let u know ASAP."

Me - "Don't worry about it, we can do it some other time."

Her - "Ok thank you. I will text you. Dealin w home repairs."

I guess that's that. I'm not going to text her again unless she texts me first. Didn't really feel like meeting her tonight anyway, so no skin off my back... lol. It's very liberating to honestly truly not give a crap.

Doesn't it amaze you that some 42yo that contacted YOU in the first place cancels on you.

Un****ingbelievable.

 

[Naughty Ninja]

Will do mang. I haven't replied to her last 2 and don't plan on it. Thanks for all the advice bro.

Anytime. Believe me they pull the same crap with me. I guess they feel online they still can "try" to maintain some type of control even though as a "hot woman" they've had to resort to online dating. I even know one girl from where I live. Don't know her personally but I know her girlfriend. They are both very attractive girls but their personalities suck. The kind of girls "Oh I don't like Guido's etc. Yet are always going to the Jersey Shore, Hampton's and trying to be "seen" according to their Facebook at all the "coolest" events or which guy they should date showing a picture of a guy with a Bentley or Lambo. It's funny at first. Then you see how these "hotties" are pathetic...and are on all the dating sites looking for "The One" and "Tired of the games"..."You GO girls!" And you keep right on going.... lmao.

It's true. NEVER listen to what people say. Judge by ACTIONS.

 

[Robert28]

Doesn't it amaze you that some 42yo that contacted YOU in the first place cancels on you.

Un****ingbelievable.

some women never grow up, dude. they say it's guys who mature slower, but that's not always the case. 42 yr old hoe still trying to play the game like shes 18. too bad her looks are looong gone.lol she'll wakeup and realize oneday that her best days are behind her.

 

[The Mad Ghost]

Cougars are always cancelling and prolonging, I effed one not so long ago.
http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=172730 My escapade with one

 

[-E-]

Well she texted me AGAIN asking if I'm on face book and giving me her full name to add her plus email address. That's 3 unanswered texts in the span of a few hours after cancelling, I'm getting the impression that she is in fact interested and maybe had a legitimate domestic emergency to attend to. Dunno, what do you guys think? Should I go ahead and respond/add her to facebook?

 

[Capodeciña]

Well she texted me AGAIN asking if I'm on face book and giving me her full name to add her plus email address. That's 3 unanswered texts in the span of a few hours after cancelling, I'm getting the impression that she is in fact interested and maybe had a legitimate domestic emergency to attend to. Dunno, what do you guys think? Should I go ahead and respond/add her to facebook?

Don't be a retard and mess this up, E. Haven't you read f28000's thread on the demise of you're MYSTERY, do not add, speak or communicate with women you're attracted to, where you're showing and throwing them you're LIFE online. This is such a mystery killer. She's just trying to get comfortable. 42 year-old still texting,? That doesn't sound right, shes acting like an 18 year-old freshman, quit this comfort zone shyt and have her call you for the re-scheduled date before you write up another thread, asking why hasn't she "texted or called".

 

[nismo-4]

OP, though she was initially attracted to you, you caused her to cancel on you. Only you. Why? Easy E, you stopped being a mystery and she knew she had you.

Remember that when a woman flakes, for whatever reason, she's just not that into you. Unless she makes it up to you, she's just not that into you.

Even women in their 50's know how to be attention wh0res. Just cuz they're old doesn't mean they're just gonna GIVE it to you.

At this point, make her call you, and if there's some iota of interest, she'll call you.

 

[-E-]

Actually guys she's been blowing up my cell with texts. If I reply once she'll send me 3. I'm not texting nearly as often as she is and I'm doing my best to be vague and mysterious with everything I say to her now.

I'll give it another shot but if she cancels next time I'll next her... it's not like I really care about the outcome of this anyway lol.

I can tell she's definitely trying to play the Cougar angle here so I'mma have some fun with it.

 

[jophil28]

Well she texted me AGAIN asking if I'm on face book and giving me her full name to add her plus email address. That's 3 unanswered texts in the span of a few hours after cancelling, I'm getting the impression that she is in fact interested and maybe had a legitimate domestic emergency to attend to. Dunno, what do you guys think? Should I go ahead and respond/add her to facebook?

It does not really matter how many signals she sends you. What matters is that you realize that you are being played in some wacked out ego game in which she pulls you in then tosses you back. You are her partner in mindsports....

Here is the point - a sane woman who is genuinely interested will make herself AVAILABLE. She will also ASK you about the details of your life. She will want to know about you, and she will ultimately COMPLY with your suggestion to meet up.
ONLY agree to go out with a woman who is moving toward you, keeps her word and does not confuse you.