You are not messing anything.
Men are attracted to femine females.
Women are attracted to masculine males.
It's all about first being a dominant male. You do that be eliminating all the insecurities you have about yourself which are basically bullshyt you've made up, and become to believe in yourself.
Next, begin searching yourself more and more, and eventually you will find the "king" within you. I can't tell you who he is or what he looks like in you, I know what he looks like in me though because I did the above.
Once you find the "king" within, begin to be more and more like him. Eventually you establish a masculine presense and display. This is what we call dominant masculine male and this is what women are attracted to.
Once you become the king within, you'll notice that you'll begin ENJOYING women more and more.
A nice guy and a jerk are really the same type of guy. Both are not dominant males, neither have become the "king" within, thus, both are two insecure azzholes. One is insecure in thinking he can buy a girl, the other is insecure in thinking the world revolves around him.
Don't get me wrong now, you can be dominant and still a jerk, I too have some jerk qualities but I also really enjoy women now and more and more each day. However, the jerk without dominance is looked upon more as a wimpy little bytch than a "tough guy." And the nice guy without the dominance is looked upon as a wimpy little doormat than a "smooth romantic."