Maybe the worst person to come to these parts...

[LostAndConfused]

Well hello all you Don Juans, I come here in need of help. I am 17 years old, and I have never dated a woman or even *talked* to a woman before. The most I've even said to a female that was not in my immediate family is just a few words, maybe just saying "hi." I've always thought I was never socially inept, as I have a great amount of male friends and I can make friends easy, but when it comes to women I'm probably even more of a failure than you can even imagine.

Of course, after 17 years of never even talking to girls, you can imagine how bitter I have grown to women in general. Sometimes whenever I talk to my good friends about their relationships, I usually tell them not to worry as all women are sluts and only want to use them to make themselves look better. In the past I had problems holding a conversation with a woman, as they would *always* seem disinterested, even though I was doing a good job at holding up my side of the conversation (as many of my friends said I was pretty good at talking to women and never came off nervous), but as time passed and as I received repeated failed conversations with women, eventually I came to the point where I don't even say a single word to women anymore.

So I come to you, Don Juans, for help. As for appearance, I feel I'm very toned when it comes to muscle size, I'm tan as I'm mixed with a black parent and a white/latino mixed parent, and I'm not really sure if I'm attractive, but apparantly what keeps being said here, you don't have to be too attractive (which I find VERY hard to believe).

 

[ElStud]

Well yeah dude, they're disinterested because all you're doing is conversing with them and probably not doing that good of a job. Read up the bible, learn about DHVing, flirting, high value and that kind of stuff. Also man, don't go around saying women are slvts just because you haven't had success with them. You're not really in a place to "not" believe, have you actually tried anything, are you really getting any success yet? No, so you're in no place to say you don't believe looks don't matter.

 

[LostAndConfused]

Well I read alot of the Bible and I didn't see much more than what my friends, who have tried to help me countless times, have already told me. Now don't get me wrong man, its a helpful book, but for me it's a bit too idealist and doesn't really help with my situation. Thanks anyways though.

 

[Bling]

Well yeah dude, they're disinterested because all you're doing is conversing with them and probably not doing that good of a job. Read up the bible, learn about DHVing, flirting, high value and that kind of stuff. Also man, don't go around saying women are slvts just because you haven't had success with them.

When did you start giving advice, Vip?

 

[ElStud]

Well, have you actually tried to apply it and have you actually gone and READ most of the bible? Doesn't look like that to me after reading your post. Idealist? I think that's an excuse not to apply the techniques. If you're looking for that magic advice that's going to fix everything, you're never going to find it man. And you're also probably never going to find advice that deals specifically with your situation, so you have to use what you've got. Gotta lose the bitterness my friend and start being open minded if you're going to improve, because right now, you haven't really tried ANYTHING so you can't tell us you're wrong. PM a guy named Snow Plowman and ask for his AIM, he'll be able to help you a lot.

 

[LostAndConfused]

Thanks I'll try to get advice from him.
Oh and on another note, I doubt im cut out for this.

 

[ElStud]

Don't doubt man, just DO it. Keep telling yourself that when you seize up and you'll be over approach anxiety quick. Just don't worry about what to say man, go up to a girl and say anything. Challenge yourself to go to the mall and approach atleast one chick, come back here, and post an FR about it.

 

[Snow Plowman]

First thing, don't worry about you're looks. Don't even second guess it, your looks isn't the main deciding factor.

Now you're best bet is to get out right now and start approaching and just have fun. Report back and you'll get some feedback. Good luck

 

[LostAndConfused]

Alright thanks I'll try that. Hope it works.

 

[AlphaOmega]

Don't worry so much about girls kid, this is all about your attitude. I've known some nasty azz girls in my time, some who don't even take showers, and I'm not even talking about the ugly ones! What makes them any different from me and you? I hope you take showers for one, but all kidding aside, treating women differently or more important in your life then men=putting them on a pedestal, period! Why do you think you have such an easy time talking to guys and not girls? Obviously you see the two as different, and thats a psychological thing inside of you, and it creates a defeatist attitude which WILL come across.

1. Change attitude - forget, and i mean forget, trying to get a woman (thats desperation, what will be will be)

2. Treat them like men - when you seem like a well-adjusted, normal, non-desperate kid is when they want you

3. Keep busy - come on man, 17 years and never spoke to a woman? You gotta find some hobbies, get a job, whatever, so you actually have a reason to seem valuable to those women, while at the same time you can meet new ones and have a chance to "pretend" that they are no more important to you than anyone else

4. Learn - read up on the good knowledge that is in this place, and try to apply it in the field. You need to be prepared for all situations. I don't believe you are this unsecessful with women, you just prolly don't know when they want you or not, i've known even the biggest nerds to have a girl after them once in a blue moon...

 

[Crazy Asian]

dude, looks are prob the most important. the people on this forum don't want to admit it, but it's true. the next msot important thing would be social status, the level of ur "game" is actually not THAT important in HIGHSCHOOL.

as for the talkin to chicks thing, the first thing you need to work on is not to sound desperate. even when i was a looser, when a desperate chick talked to me, i was turned off so u can imagine.....

u should notice something about them or pay attention to wut they are talking about, and make a funny joke about it, or make fun of them for wearing something thats unusual.

make sure u smile and have eye contact, and try to act like your in control (even if it's not true) and not be a manbytch.

 

[shydude]

You said u never spoke with a girl, then u go on with your story how ur convos are fked up with women...I dont know whats wrong with you and neither anyone else in here knows.. its like a million page essay i gotta write to list all the things i think u do bad... So read DJ bible And IMPROVE LITTLE BY LITTLE... No one will tell you exactly wtf is wrong with your confidence etc..Now improving your looks... I cant know unless i see you, maybe u look good, maybe u dress like a Bum...Try reading some magazines about styles and askin friends wat will look good on u..

 

[(JJ)]

dude relax and focus on being fun and confident. those are the two main traits that are ABSOLUTELY necessary in high school. ur right looks arent entirely important, but they sure help. and i kno u cant just learn confidence. im lucky. i was raised by extremely loving parents that instilled into me the fact that im great and so that is a deep seated belief i have, but at the same time i kno that i havent had my success because of my looks. im pretty good looking but the fact that i KNOW im good looking and smart and funny and a 'catch' is what puts the ladies over the edge. being fun, funny, and confident are the three best possible things to do. not to mention these are things that are under ur control... unlike ur appearance