Masculine energy

[tesla8520]

This is going to be a long post, but It may be worth reading.

Based on what this woman says: women don't openly tell men what really triggers their attraction because they know that, once men understand it, they could deliberately use that knowledge to their advantage.
So this also tells us that women recognize something in men that most men themselves don't fully understand.

Every man has it, but some men know how to express it, consciously or unconsciously, while others seem unable to bring it out.
This could explain why women sometimes reject perfectly attractive men. On paper, these men have everything going for them, but something is missing.

They haven't learned how to express their inner masculine energy.

There's an interesting part in the video where the woman describes a guy she had rejected in the past.
After some years, they met again and he got angry with her, and she suddenly found herself turned on by him.
It was a reaction she hadn't experienced before with him.
This man suddenly displayed something she had previously seen in him, something that had been dormant, came out through his behavior. And her perception of him changed almost instantly.

What this woman felt, is something I saw happening IRL with my own eyes.
I once saw a confrontation between two guys while one of my female friends was present.
She became visibly startled: her eyes widened, her cheeks turned red, and her breathing became noticeably faster.
The fear and excitement were somehow becoming mixed together in her perception of the guy who was provoking the confrontation.

Connecting the dots to how me and you can see how many women stay in relationships with men who are immature, unpredictable, or emotionally volatile.
These men express anger, resentment, criticism, jealousy, or frustration with explosive reactions over relatively minor things.
Yet their partners remain attracted to them, sometimes for years.
It came to be that these behaviors express that masculine energy at full intensity that the woman finds attractive in a man, but would never tell him, but actually they will, that night they will show their attraction in bed.
This also help explain why women are drawn to men who are emotionally intense or impulsive rather than men who are consistently calm, reasonable, and predictable.

I'm not suggesting that ADHD, bipolar disorder, or any other mental health condition makes someone more masculine or attractive. Those are separate issues, and having a mental health condition doesn't automatically make someone volatile or unpredictable.
But the point is about aknowledging the fact that a woman is attracted by how a man with mental health condition will express his masculine energy, rather than a healthy man who was not trained to do that.

So some of the behaviors we commonly label as toxic in our modern society, couple therapy, etc, overlap with behaviors that communicate confidence, intensity, and a willingness to stand one's ground
Here's where I think the discussion gets interesting.
Think of masculine energy as a flame.

To be attractive and attract women and the people around you, this flame must not only be lit.
It must be "brought out," almost touching people, so that they can feel it.
They don't just feel the heat and see the light; now people can get burned, or they can get scorched, and that's where women are attracted to men.
Nowadays, men are told to self improve and becoming mature and healthy. With this change, they're learning how to keep the flame burning, but not how to take it out and let people feel it.
In fact, it's as if they've now put something out that extinguishes the flame, when instead, it should be propagated.

Now, this is just a theory.
And we're here to discuss this, so I'm not attacking anyone in particular, but describing how the general advice we see online, including much of the advice discussed in communities like SoSuave, is that men should become more assertive, emotionally stable, confident, and self-controlled.
We are told not to react emotionally, treat people with respect, not to let others control our emotional state, etc, but trying so hard to become controlled and emotionally mature... aren't we suppressing the very intensity that makes us attractive in the first place?
Women actions are telling us that.

So, if women are attracted to this masculine energy, why should men spend so much time trying to become more controlled, restrained, and emotionally neutral, never get angry, expresses frustration, but always responds calmly, assertively, with respect?
What if some behaviors that get labeled as "toxic" are not inherently attractive because they're toxic, but because they sometimes reveal qualities that are attractive in their own right?
"Emotional intensity" may be a better term.

A woman might say that she wants an emotionally mature, respectful man. But in practice, she might repeatedly find herself attracted to men who are able to show masculine energy, even if those men are not respectful nor emotionally mature.
That doesn't necessarily mean she's lying. Instead, we can look at how her actions could actually tell us the truth.

Every man possesses what we could call masculine energy.
Some people might call it sexual energy, but I prefer the term masculine energy because it refer to a broader set of qualities.
A man's behavior determines how much of that energy he communicates to the people around him. (The flame example we've seen above).
Some men naturally express it. Others struggle to do so.
The more energy a man communicates, the more likely he may be to stand out from other men in the eyes of women.
If women are better at recognizing these qualities than men are at understanding them, perhaps we should pay closer attention to what actually creates attraction rather than relying exclusively on what people say should create it.

 

[tesla8520]

Suppose we accept the theory that masculine energy plays an important role in attraction.
The next question becomes: how does a man learn to express it ?
How does a man show that energy in every situation, without hiding it.


Think about how men approach almost every other skill in life.
If you want to become good at archery, you practice with a bow.
If you want to become physically stronger, you follow a training program, increase the weight over time, and measure your progress.
If you want to become a better public speaker, you practice speaking in front of people until you become more comfortable and effective.
So why shouldn't we approach masculine self-expression in the same way?
If a man wants to become better at expressing this energy, shouldn't he have a structured way to practice those qualities?

I'm interested in discussing this because, although I find the theory compelling, I don't currently have a reliable, structured guide that explains how men can develop ways to "to spread the flame" of their own masculine energy, step by step.

Think about strength training.
A beginner doesn't walk into a gym and randomly lift weights until he feels stronger.
He follows a program. He knows that today he needs to bench press 50 kg for three sets of eight repetitions. He knows when to rest, when to train again, and when to increase the weight. Over time, he tracks his progress and adjusts the program accordingly.

That's how people develop physical strength.
Could we apply a similar approach to masculine energy expression?
Could we create a program that helps men develop ways to get their masculine energy out, through daily exercises, practical challenges, feedback, and measurable progress?

Perhaps it would take several months. Perhaps a year or two of consistent practice would be needed to see significant changes.
The point is to move beyond vague advice and develop a process that men can actually follow.
I'm presenting the theory here because I'd like to hear your thoughts before going any further.

I'd be interested in hearing your experiences, your disagreements.
If there's enough interest, perhaps we could eventually put together a group of guys and develop a structured guide for men who want to improve this aspect of themselves.
I'm curious to hear what you guys think.

P.S. Why did I write this post?
Because no woman will ever teach a man how to do this.
No woman will ever show a man how to improve.
And no woman will ever put herself in such a dangerously vulnerable position by sharing those intimate secrets with him.
But we are men. We are friends. We are brothers.
So let’s help each other get better.
Let’s do this.

 

[tesla8520]

Some examples that could confirm that the theory is valid and that there is something that works

Every man can have a different type of "intensity of masculine energy", and note that women are always attracted only to those who manage to have a more strong output of that.
Women can spot that in a room of 5 men.
It's a feature of their innate radar to sense which of these 5 men have the highest masculine energy output.

Their radar is not synced to healthy patterns, being good, being moral, having values, being attractive, etc.
(those things might work for the first few months in a relationship or in a STR, ONS)

But there must be something that make a given man, the most important in her radar.
And this is also widely compatible, not tailored to a single woman.


You could be a man who plays the piano, and a woman likes you because she also likes playing music, and has a crush on you..
But then John arrives. John smokes weed and drinks, he's so disrespectful, but he expresses his masculine energy more powerfully than the piano player would, and the woman is totally hooked now.
Wonder on what her radar is now pointing on?!

This is what it means that every man has his own baseline level of masculine energy output, but only if he manages to bring it out there 100% will women put him first in their ranking. Only in that particular circumstance women will se a new point lights up in their radar and fill the space so that other men are now insignificant.


So we can reiterate that every woman is attracted to a very high output of masculine energy.
Every woman has preferences in a man such as physical attractiveness, how he dresses, what job he does, how he behaves, how respectful he is, his family, money, status, etc...
But when put together, women will only ever choose the man who can take his masculine energy from within and bring it out at a higher level than any other man She every knew.