Married but feel alone

[Chosen1]

I've been off this site for about 6 months now and I've met and feel in love with a girl. We are now married. But I feel as if I walk on earth alone still. Our interests are not the same and I feel as if we won't ever be "ONE". She really loves me though and I'm tried of feeling lonely. What would you guys do?


P.S She never ever listens to me

 

[Mr. Wise]

I've been off this site for about 6 months now and I've met and feel in love with a girl. We are now married. But I feel as if I walk on earth alone still. Our interests are not the same and I feel as if we won't ever be "ONE". She really loves me though and I'm tried of feeling lonely. What would you guys do?


P.S She never ever listens to me

You really need to give more info on your situation in order for us to help.

Why is it you feel alone?
How do you know she really loves you?

BTW, it's sometimes healthy for a relationship that you two have different interests and hobbies. Too much "together" time makes you crazy - you have to live together already.

 

[DoctorLW]

Hold on. How long did you date before you got married? In my opinion unless you have lived with someone for at least a year or two to see how they interact on a daily basis, you aren't ready to marry them. Also, some girls hide their true selves UNTIL they are married.

In my family each father for a few generations has said one thing to each son regarding marraige, "Look at the woman's mother carefully before you marry her." Now you would wonder how this advice gets passed down repeatedly, but it's because everyone is so certain and thinks "It won't happen to me." I've heard this information passed down for enough generations at this point that I will follow it for sure. Once a woman is married they resort to their true selves... most often very similar to their mother.

Anyway, I got away from the point of this post. If you feel this way after so short a period of time, you better get out now. No reason to subject yourself to further misery. I know it sucks, I feel for you man, but next time you'll have to make a better decision (and meet the girls mom and analyze her closely!).

EDIT: I agree with the above poster we need a little more info here. But my overall sense was that you don't feel right with your marraige. After so short a period of time it should not be like that. Marraiges tend to detiorate after a few years, not within months.

 

[tsmith2334]

Your best taking this stuff to a marriage counseler or therapist. They can probably help you much better and are more qualified.

 

[MacAvoy]

We need more info

 

[penkitten]

thats where you've been hiding?
come on chosen, you got married, not dead.
spill the beans and tell us more@@@

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Your best taking this stuff to a marriage counseler or therapist. They can probably help you much better and are more qualified.

:yes:

 

[KontrollerX]

If there's no kids and you are not happy get out now before more damage is done.

If you feel you do want to be with her but things have to change go the counselor route and see if anything improves.

Anyway dude I have to ask have you always felt alone no matter who you are in a relationship with?

I ask because if its that type of loneliness it usually comes from never becoming comfortable and happy with yourself.

With your own company.

If you've only felt this loneliness in bad relationships then I'd have to say its your selection process thats the problem and not your status of being happy and comfortable with yourself or not.

In anycase you need to do a lot of soul searching to find exactly what you need to do brother.

We'll all help you with that in any way that we can.

 

[aliasguy]

I know it's too late now, but WHY in the HELL did you get MARRIED?

You read on this site for 6 months and knowing what you know you married a chick THIS quickly?

I think Kontroller may be right, here.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I know it's too late now, but WHY in the HELL did you get MARRIED?

You read on this site for 6 months and knowing what you know you married a chick THIS quickly?

I think Kontroller may be right, here.

Yeah, it's closing the barn door a bit late but like you said there's more than enough information in the forum that should make a guy pause before making such an important decision. Whatever the reason, it was more important for him at the time. Sad that the only time that marriage and "happily ever after" is a certainty is in a Disney movie.

 

[MooseGod]

You gotta love yourself before you can love another. It sounds like some cliche BS, but it's true. You can run all your life and not go anywhere at all.




Yeah, I kinda got that last line from a Social Distortion song. Wanna fight about it?

 

[tick37]

You gotta love yourself before you can love another. It sounds like some cliche BS, but it's true. You can run all your life and not go anywhere at all.




Yeah, I kinda got that last line from a Social Distortion song. Wanna fight about it?

Find things that you enjoy for yourself. Let her find things she likes to enjoy for herself. Find things that you guys enjoy together. Have a date night once a week or every two weeks. A woman loves a man with passions of his own, and it gives her some excitement. It sounds like you're wanting her to be your happiness and your whole world. Do not do this!

A marriage counselor sounds like a good idea, too. It won't do any good though if her mind isn't into it. I've been there, but I was a true AFC then.

You've probably become predictable and lost any mystery you had in the relationship. Now you guys are in a rut. A good book to read is "The Divorce Remedy". It's an excellent read, and you'll be glad you read it.

 

[jamescr73]

6 months on the site?

Chosen1
Master Don Juan

Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Up in Yo Girl is where you might find me
Posts: 544



what year is this?

 

[randalll]

i fvcking love social distortion

and i see what you mean

"dont think about the future, and just forget about the past, and make it lasttt"