Man-up

[thehunterwright]

Okay, since my first posting here a couple weeks ago I've been talking the responses I've received to heart, reading through the Bible. I've noticed one thing already. I'm getting different responses. Honestly, all I'm doing differently is telling women what I want and not asking them, or trying to steer them. I'm just blunt, sometimes too blunt, even. One example, this is with a dancer, she's actually way cool, not just hot, yea whatever. It must have been over 6 month now when she first approached me with the idea that we should get together to watch some Dr. Who, I told you she was cool. I agreed, and we made each other swear "No falling in love". Well it never made it farther from there. I was not sober the one time she called to meet up. It would get brought-up whenever we saw each other at the strip club. So again maybe a month ago she messages about getting together for a marathon. As typical, I was the wishy-washy nice guy I've always been. Tonight I was talking to a friend who suddenly wants more than friendships and we were talking about Dr. Who as costumes. So out of the blue, I send a message to my dancer friend:

Me: "Hey you. There is no way I'm letting you make me watch Dr Who by myself, so we are going to get together for a Dr-athon."
Her: "I'm at work. I don't know how late I'm staying though. Thursday off."
Me: "Thursday it is. Let's start at 8pm."
Her: "Sounds good ;-)"

To many this is a small victory, but I'll take it. So, I'm going to keep my fingers crossed and unless she flakes out will have a field report.

So yea, my last thought is I need to man-up. Let the repressed male inside of me out, I can still be me, a gentleman even, but I still need to be a man, not a boy. So to myself I say, "A woman has a right to get mad if you can't even be a man. You're literally wasting her time and yours."

 

[Slickster]

This is a good post!

It is amazing how just a subtle difference in wording can make such a huge difference. Be bold! Take what you want

Some examples:

You should say, "I'm going to XYZ its going to be great, why don't you come along?" instead of "Do you want to go to XYZ with me?"

The first one is an open ended question that requires a reason to say no to. The second one can be answered in one word, yes or no. The first one indicates that regardless of her answer you are going and you will have fun with or without her. The second one allows her to reject you.

Another,

"Hey what time do you get off work?" (Wait for answer) "Do you want to hang out later?" This is what most dudes say and it's fine but you are placing the ball in her court. You should be bold and say with a smile, "Hey I want to hang out with you after work. What time should I pick you up?"


Another,

After chatting for a bit you say, "Hey I really like those shoes!" She says, "Really?" You say, "Yep, I want to see if they can dance. Let's go!" Grab her hand and lead her to the floor. Most guys would just be lame and say "Do you want to dance?"


Take charge, be bold. The responses you get will surprise you.