"The Kiss of Death Mistake"

You replay the conversation at 2 a.m. She texted back fast yesterday. Today, nothing. Was that smile friendly or flirty? What did the shoulder touch mean?

Every hour you spend decoding her signals drains your confidence and hands her the controls. Women can sense that insecurity from across the room — and it repels them.

One of the "22 Rules" kills the obsession on the spot: assume she likes you, and act accordingly. Sounds too simple. Works anyway.

Her interest tends to rise to meet your expectations. Psychologists call it a self-fulfilling prophecy.

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Man, I screwed up bad last night (What did I do wrong?)

Brighty

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Basically this is a follow up to this thread:

http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=139223


Well things started off well enough, we both good talk when I picked her up and we carried on a conversation about the place she's from, her school, her friends, etc. while we drove to a party. However, we must've been in the car for a while going around my city because we were looking for a party to go to, but we still had things to talk about. All this time she was giving me subtle hints that she was into me, but I lacked the goddamn balls, even when she was in my ****ing CAR practically raring to go to ask her if she wanted to do anything.

Then we got to the party and I attempted to play it cool and indifferent, I introduced her to a few people at the party and then I told her to 'go make friends' because I had to piss. We ended up just chilling there for a little bit (we were talking and then I went up and she got invited by another guy to dance with her, since all we were doing was sitting on a couch, which didn't really bother me, but I'm curious as to if that was a sign that I wasn't interested in her if I didn't dance with her) and then things got a little hectic (fight almost broke out) and we decided to leave. By now she had a little to drink and it was around 3:00am and so I decided to take her home (she lives 30 mins away).

While we were driving, I mean she was still giving me hints that she wanted to hook up but I really didn't know how to respond. Somehow the conversation went to her hooking up with another dude and we ended up talking about *******s for a little bit and all of a sudden she's like "<laugh> Why are we talking about this?" and I respond "I unno, does it make you uncomfortable?", and then "No.. its just eh, lets change the subject". All night, she basically says "I still want to go do something", to which I agree "yeah, but what?" and we play this game for God knows how much of the night. Eventually we start to run out of things to talk about and things sort of get awkward in the car ride. She stares at me in the car and makes a 'cute' face while tapping her head as if she's thinking, we stare at each other for ten seconds straight and I say 'what?' and she goes 'nothing... nothing'. And then as we're nearing her house, this little gem happens:

Me: "I still want to do something"
Her: "yeah"
Me: "do you want to... fool around?"
Her: "??? sorry I just had a blonde moment"
Me: "i mean do you want to or not?"
Her: "want to what..."
Me: "come on, yes or no? might as well make the most of this night"
Her: "..."

An awkward silence pretty much ensues for the next five minutes until I drop her off, to when I park she says "turn your car lights off, oh wait, you're not coming in, nevermind" and then she gives me a hug and then walks out of the car to her house, leaving me somewhat dumbfounded as to how I screwed up.

I know you're not supposed to apologize, but I ended up texting her and saying that I didnt really feel like myself that night (had a little to drink).


Was it my delivery of the line "Do you want to fool around, might as well make the most of the night" sounding as though 'hey, tonight sucked but i guess the less worse thing would be to hook up with you, lets do that'. Should I have been more romantic and complimented her and said something mushy? Was I too blunt? How do you guys ease a girl into that? I mean, was I interpreting the signs correctly? She gets around a bit, shes a little freaky, so its not like she's innocent about the whole thing. I'm only 17 so there's still time for me to learn this stuff and I understand that I'm not going to see success right away, this is all a learning process. Thanks for your help
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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romangod

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Too much "talk" and not enough action. Lead or get out of the way. When the time was right you should have leaned over and kissed her out of the blue. Her reaction would have told you everything you needed to know. Good luck.
 

Microphone Fiend

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Wow... man someone get a mod to copy and paste this into 'The Most Obvious Come-On's that were missed" thread in the archives.

Here's what I saw wrong

1.) If you do not know a girl well a first date should not be a place where guys go to meet girls, ie a bar

2) There is nothing wrong with being indifferent but if you really think a girl will be faithful to you on the first date, think again. You are lucky when you went to take a piss some guy didnt take her home and fvck her or build up more attraction than you had and made her leave you alone @ the club

3) You cannot come out and say 'Let's make out". When you come out and say it, girls feel slvtty and like they are a piece of meat. When she said, "I still want to do something, that means she wants to do something with you. Pick an activity that isolates her and make a move. Tell them you got a movie that you want to watch, you want a tour of the house, or any kinda sh!t that gets you inside the house or her inside your house.

4) Talking about her making out with other dudes is not cool unless you are planning on getting her hot n horny n capitalizing on it yourself.

5) Make a move, be a man. Don't ask her if she wants to kiss or make out, go in and do it and then you will find out what she wants based on her reaction.

6) Don't apologize for not being a man. Just be a man next time
 

Brighty

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Microphone Fiend said:
Wow... man someone get a mod to copy and paste this into 'The Most Obvious Come-On's that were missed" thread in the archives.

Here's what I saw wrong

1.) If you do not know a girl well a first date should not be a place where guys go to meet girls, ie a bar

2) There is nothing wrong with being indifferent but if you really think a girl will be faithful to you on the first date, think again. You are lucky when you went to take a piss some guy didnt take her home and fvck her or build up more attraction than you had and made her leave you alone @ the club

3) You cannot come out and say 'Let's make out". When you come out and say it, girls feel slvtty and like they are a piece of meat. When she said, "I still want to do something, that means she wants to do something with you. Pick an activity that isolates her and make a move. Tell them you got a movie that you want to watch, you want a tour of the house, or any kinda sh!t that gets you inside the house or her inside your house.

4) Talking about her making out with other dudes is not cool unless you are planning on getting her hot n horny n capitalizing on it yourself.

5) Make a move, be a man. Don't ask her if she wants to kiss or make out, go in and do it and then you will find out what she wants based on her reaction.

6) Don't apologize for not being a man. Just be a man next time
Thanks guys, I suppose we all ahve to make mistakes along the way before we can get to the prize.
 
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Microphone Fiend said:
Wow... man someone get a mod to copy and paste this into 'The Most Obvious Come-On's that were missed" thread in the archives.

Here's what I saw wrong

1.) If you do not know a girl well a first date should not be a place where guys go to meet girls, ie a bar

2) There is nothing wrong with being indifferent but if you really think a girl will be faithful to you on the first date, think again. You are lucky when you went to take a piss some guy didnt take her home and fvck her or build up more attraction than you had and made her leave you alone @ the club

3) You cannot come out and say 'Let's make out". When you come out and say it, girls feel slvtty and like they are a piece of meat. When she said, "I still want to do something, that means she wants to do something with you. Pick an activity that isolates her and make a move. Tell them you got a movie that you want to watch, you want a tour of the house, or any kinda sh!t that gets you inside the house or her inside your house.

4) Talking about her making out with other dudes is not cool unless you are planning on getting her hot n horny n capitalizing on it yourself.

5) Make a move, be a man. Don't ask her if she wants to kiss or make out, go in and do it and then you will find out what she wants based on her reaction.

6) Don't apologize for not being a man. Just be a man next time
This says it all! :up:
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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The Forms

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Have you ever kissed a girl before? You can't just ASK a girl if she wants to hook up. You never need to ASK a girl if you can kiss her. It makes her feel like you think she's a slut to just ASK for a hook-up. She spent the whole night waiting for you to make a move. Next time you're in a position like this go to a local make-out spot (I assume you still live with your folks) and park the car. Put a John Mayer on the CD player and get comfy.

Here's a little secret about the first kiss: she's DYING for it all night. She really wants you to kiss her. You don't need to ASK if you can kiss her. You just do it. It doesn't have to be smooth or suave. She's sneaking out of her parents house late at night to spend time with you. She doesn't do this for boys she DOESN'T want to kiss. She sees them in the afternoon.

I have interrupted girls mid-sentence on the first date to kiss them. You just lean in and do it. Don't worry, she won't be mad. She'll completely forget what she was talking about by the end of the kiss anyway.
 
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