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"Man files lawsuit to take wife's name"

DJDamage

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http://news.yahoo.com/s/ap/20070112/ap_on_re_us/take_my_wife_s_name

LOS ANGELES - Mike Buday isn't married to his last name. In fact, he and his fiancee decided before they wed that he would take hers. But Buday was stunned to learn that he couldn't simply become Mike Bijon when they married in 2005.

As in most other states, that would require some bureaucratic paperwork well beyond what a woman must go through to change her name when marrying.

Instead of completing the expensive, time-consuming process, Buday and his wife, Diana Bijon, enlisted the American Civil Liberties Union and filed a discrimination lawsuit against the state of California. They claim the difficulty faced by a husband seeking to change his name violates the equal protection clause of the 14th Amendment.

"Diana and I feel strongly about gender equality for both men and women," Buday said. "I think the most important thing in all of this is to bring it to a new level of awareness."

Mark Rosenbaum, legal director of the ACLU in Southern California, said it is the first federal lawsuit of its kind in the country. "It's the perfect marriage application for the 17th century," Rosenbaum said. "It belongs in the same trash can as dowries."

Only six states — Georgia, Hawaii, Iowa, Massachusetts, New York and North Dakota — have statutes establishing equal name-change processes for men and women when they marry. In California and other states, men cannot choose a different last name while filing a marriage license.

In California, a man who wants to take his wife's name must file a petition, pay more than $300, place a public notice for weeks in a local newspaper and then appear before a judge.

Because of Buday's case, a California state lawmaker has introduced a bill to put a space on the marriage license for either spouse to change names.

The Census Bureau does not keep figures on how many U.S. men are taking their brides' names. But clearly it happening more and more. Milwaukee County, Wis., Clerk Mark Ryan estimated that one in every 100 grooms there now takes the name of his wife.

Bijon, 28, approached Buday about the idea when they were dating. She had no brothers but wanted to prolong the family name. Buday, a 29-year-old developer of interactive advertising, was estranged from his own father and was not attached to his own last name.

"I knew immediately it was pretty important to her or else she wouldn't have brought it up," Buday said.

At one point, the couple tried the Department of Motor Vehicles to get a name change. But Buday said he was told by a woman behind the counter: "Men just don't do that type of thing."

Couples who want to hyphenate or combine their names also must endure the lengthy court procedures in California. One of the more notable examples was Los Angeles Mayor Antonio Villaraigosa, who went to court to fuse his last name, Villar, with his wife's, Raigosa, when they married in 1987.

Laws giving women an easy choice of names were largely a byproduct of the feminist movement. A 2004 Harvard University study found that the number of college-educated women who kept their surnames upon marriage rose from about 3 percent in 1975 to nearly 20 percent in 2001.
Just give your woman everything she wants, let her dictate the kind of marriage that will be suited best for her and then wonder why your marriage went down the crapper :crackup:
 

RedPill

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You know, all they'd have to do if they really wanted to carry on her name is give the kids her last name. He wouldn't have to change his. That's stupid however you slice it.

Speaking of, what the hell is this? Somebody needs to fire their attorney. What was the point of giving her over half his assets in the prenup?
 

lee36044

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"Diana and I feel strongly about gender equality for both men and women," Buday said. "I think the most important thing in all of this is to bring it to a new level of awareness.
I wonder if they feel strongly enough to make it truly equal? Cut off his tool, use it to permanently plug her hole, and go through life as equal neuters? That kind of commitment would definitely bring something to a new level of awareness!

Sorry ... couldn't resist :)
 

MatureDJ

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I actually agree with the argument - that it is a violation of the 14th Amendment to have name changes only work one way. It's the same reason I am support same sex marriage (as a legal option - call it "civil unions" or whatever.)

With that said, I am a traditionalist and would never change my last name for my wife. It seems that this guy had some issues with his family, and is doing this as some sort of rebellion against them - not because she demanded it.
 

WaterTiger

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It should be just as easy for a man to change his name as it is for a woman. In fact, we can use BOTH if we want. Ms. Sue Jones for work, Mrs. Sue Green for private. You guys try that and you'll get nailed for fraud.

As the last of my family line, and being female, I understand where the woman is coming from. I'm glad she found a guy that was willing to work it out with her.
 

Hitman10000

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It does make sense, if the woman can change into her husband's last name. Couldn't the husband do the same? While some of you may see it as "little pansy boy is catering to his domineering wife" he is actually "The Man" considering he is making a big point about gender equality for men.
 

wayword

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Right, and is she going to pay for the entire wedding, honeymoon, house and buy him a 1-carat engagement ring then - to be "fair?" It's funny how feminism destroys our equitable trade-off's by taking more and more rights away from men while giving nothing back.

My god, talk about Generation AFC...I'll bet this ho cheats on this puzzy and takes half his shyt in 10 years - and he will have DESERVED IT.
 

Rollo Tomassi

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Dammit! DJDAMAGE beat me to this. Props. I picked up on this story over the weekend.

Diana and I feel strongly about gender equality for both men and women," Buday said. "I think the most important thing in all of this is to bring it to a new level of awareness."
I'm sorry, but wouldn't gender equality mean they should both keep their own last names?
 

DJDamage

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WaterTiger said:
As the last of my family line, and being female, I understand where the woman is coming from. I'm glad she found a guy that was willing to work it out with her.
What ever happend to glad to find a guy period.?? Its pretty sad that this changing of a last name is a deal breaker for their marriage. Personally if any woman asks me to change my last name, I wouldn't see the need to get married to her because if she can change tradition then so can I. You tinker too much with marriage and what is suppose to be and it doesn't become one.
 

ElChoclo

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She should carry him over the threshold. Could this poof explain what gender equality as a concept, actually means. This is what happens when the kid does not respect the father.

He has already beaten his own kid to the punch though, because if his boy wants to copy him by rejecting his father's name, he can only reject his mother's name.
 

Latinoman

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WaterTiger said:
As the last of my family line, and being female, I understand where the woman is coming from. I'm glad she found a guy that was willing to work it out with her.

The ‘equality’ is not the issue here. After all, she can keep her last name. Heck, they can both give their last name to their child (hyphenate).

The real issue in here is that she has ZERO respect for HIS last name. And that she is putting her dad before her ‘husband’.

Now…I bet that during their wedding (considering the close ties she obviously has with her dad), her dad is going “to give her away”. Guess what…why should he? Giving the bride away is symbolic from a Man giving his daughter to her husband…making him (husband) The Man.

More importantly, is the fact that it appears that she would not marry him if he didn’t agree to this. After all, she strongly believes that her family name should be passed to her children. So, in reality all she should have done is get implanted with spermatozoids in order to have a child. In fact, if her goal is to have her last name given to her children (so they could pass it along), then she shouldn’t marry.
 

Charisma

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Slightly off topic but: what's this child hyphenate business naming thing? Is it common practice or something? I don't know anyone but some 'nobility' (yes they exist in my country) that do that.. What's this habbit then? Standard practice?

By the way, that guy is well on his way to join the suicide statistics sjeez, what the **** is wrong with him... as someone stated above, if it's equality they search, then both keep your ****ing name, big ****ing deal.
 

Latinoman

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The people born in Latino countries (including Spain) are born with two last names. The last name of the father first, followed by their maternal last name.

For instance Ricardo Luis Sanchez Noriega.

Ricardo is the first name.
Luis is the middle name.
Sanchez is the father’s last name.
Noriega is the mother’s last name.

Very rarely, a woman in Latino countries take their husband’s last name. Instead, some of the use the Maria Noriega de Sanchez. Where

Maria is the first name.
Noriega is her dad’s last name.
de Sanchez is her husband’s last name, where “de” is the equivalent to “belonging to”


Many of the Latino born people that move into the U.S. either drop their Mother’s last name (e.g. Ricardo L. Sanchez) or simply keep both last names. However, they hyphenate them. So, it would be Ricardo L. Sanchez-Noriega. If he marries in the U.S. and have kids (here kids have only one last name) and have a child named Joe…then the full name of the child would be Joe Sanchez.

Of course, you have the celebrity phenomenum too with the Jodie-Pitt (in this case, the woman's last name first, etc.).
 
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