Making Changes To Our Life Style Using NLP...

[Canadien]

Once we understand our own map of reality, we can make changes to it in order to obtain the life experiences we want. NLP provides us "maps" used by other people. We learn how others have responded to a particular situation we are facing. We see the differences in the approaches and in the outcomes. Based on it, we may voluntarily make changes to our own behavior. We step out of our own map and step into the other's. When this happens, the rewards are many. We experience a deep connection to the successful person. And our life will never be the same again.

NLP increases the depth and effectiveness of our relationships, beginning with our self and extending through personal and intimate relationships to our professional and work lives, and finally, to the therapeutic arena or working with others to bring about healing, change and growth. NLP provides the tools that enable this rich connection with self and others to happen.

Link:
http://www.holisticonline.com/hol_neurolinguistic.htm#RepresentationalSystems

So how effective is NLP, and is this on par compared to Mystery, De angelo, Style and other Gurus? Is this worth studying more then seduction material? I've been really focused around NLP for over two months now, and it seems to be very effective at its core purpose...

 

[Outsider]

I hope NLP teaches people how to kiss too, I hear that's important.

 

[ready123]

NLP works, but it takes time to implement and you don't NEED it. and for a lot of people, the techinques are just so wierd it's not even worth it

I used the "swish" technique a lot before and it helped me change my reality at work and become more productive. when I broke up with my last ex, she found my NLP book and used some of the tricks to get over me... lol

for seduction though, there are easier ways to improve both your external and internal game. NLP is one of those things that's a cool complement to a solid foundation, IF you don't find it bizarre, but the core of seduction involves communication skills and personality, and NLP doesn't replace either

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

NLP works, but it takes time to implement and you don't NEED it. and for a lot of people, the techinques are just so wierd it's not even worth it

I used the "swish" technique a lot before and it helped me change my reality at work and become more productive. when I broke up with my last ex, she found my NLP book and used some of the tricks to get over me... lol

for seduction though, there are easier ways to improve both your external and internal game. NLP is one of those things that's a cool complement to a solid foundation, IF you don't find it bizarre, but the core of seduction involves communication skills and personality, and NLP doesn't replace either

Actually if you understand NLP beyond what is taught about using it for seduction, it's actually takes very little time to incorporate and see its effects.

 

[reset]

I'm reading Psycho-Cybernetics right now and I think much of NLP is based on that, and it's a small book.

I gave NLP a shot several years ago but it was way too complicated and confusing for me, and almost all the books on it seem to be for people who are already psychologists.

Psycho-Cybernetics focuses on changing your self-image. That would probably help with the ladies.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I'm reading Psycho-Cybernetics right now and I think much of NLP is based on that, and it's a small book.

I gave NLP a shot several years ago but it was way too complicated and confusing for me, and almost all the books on it seem to be for people who are already psychologists.

Psycho-Cybernetics focuses on changing your self-image. That would probably help with the ladies.

Very true. There are instances where you could use NLP to enact the self-image changes. Consider how Dr. Maltz references "the theater of your mind," it a basic NLP method of changing your perception of a particular thing.

 

[ready123]

Actually if you understand NLP beyond what is taught about using it for seduction, it's actually takes very little time to incorporate and see its effects.

I noticed NLP helped me when I altered submodalities, which is why I like the swish and other patterns. But the other stuff I toyed with - IE positions, anchoring, meta programs, etc didn't do anything for me. I assumed it was a time thing but who knows, maybe I just didn't understand the model

as for seduction, I think there are better ways to focus your energy instead of NLP, especially if you're just starting out and are unaware of your strengths and weaknesses. a lot of NLP concepts, such as controling the frame, rapport building, calibration are now general concepts in seduction and embedded in other techniques. plus they all happen naturally when someone is socially intelligent

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I noticed NLP helped me when I altered submodalities, which is why I like the swish and other patterns. But the other stuff I toyed with - IE positions, anchoring, meta programs, etc didn't do anything for me. I assumed it was a time thing but who knows, maybe I just didn't understand the model

Anchoring, meta programs and the rest are best used when dealing with issues such as addictions and anxiety control. It's not the best way to promote authentic change, they're just methods that are akin to willpower which help mask an issue which will remain as ones foundation. This is why guys who try to use anchoring to create a particular state have difficulty maintaining that state, it's not authentic.

as for seduction, I think there are better ways to focus your energy instead of NLP, especially if you're just starting out and are unaware of your strengths and weaknesses. a lot of NLP concepts, such as controlling the frame, rapport building, calibration are now general concepts in seduction and embedded in other techniques. plus they all happen naturally when someone is socially intelligent

Ross Jefferies Speed Seduction is a good example of using NLP as a external tool as opposed to an internal one to promote personal change. The problem is that it focuses on controlling external situations which is much more difficult than controlling your own strengths or weaknesses.

 

[reset]

Psycho-Cybernetics seems to be largely about how we are hypnotized. I used to think you had to dig up all your childhood BS and "work through it", and I have done plenty of that, but if we're just hypnotized then you can un-hypnotize yourself, like with visualization and affirmations, saving hundreds of years of therapy...

I understood the general consensus was that things like affirmations don't work, but apparently they do. Like you can literally say enough good things about yourself and eventually your mind will accept them.

 

[stylemaker]

Ross Jefferies Speed Seduction is a good example of using NLP as a external tool as opposed to an internal one to promote personal change. The problem is that it focuses on controlling external situations which is much more difficult than controlling your own strengths or weaknesses.

Externally, meaning using techniques such as anchoring that affects them? Do you suggest balancing an attempt of controlling externally and controlling yourself simultaneously? And what are some ways of controlling your own strengths and weaknesses?

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Externally, meaning using techniques such as anchoring that affects them? Do you suggest balancing an attempt of controlling externally and controlling yourself simultaneously? And what are some ways of controlling your own strengths and weaknesses?

Personally, once I released the notion of trying to control external things which I would have little influence over at best, I realized that gave my a ton of energy to focus on what I could control, myself. That goes well beyond my actions too. Most importantly I have control over my perception of whats going on around me (the things that I can not control).

Controlling my perception makes controlling my reaction to them really easy, so easy that they don't even feel as if I'm reacting at all. I'm just "doing," or taking the action that I choose to take instead of reacting to uncontrollable situations which someone else have created. This includes things like sh1t tests, c0ck blockers, alphas, bad wingmen, women in groups, etc. No matter the situation, no matter the venue, no matter the woman, my trump card is that I have the ability to control my perception of what's going on and how I chose to interact with reality.

 

[stylemaker]

Personally, once I released the notion of trying to control external things which I would have little influence over at best, I realized that gave my a ton of energy to focus on what I could control, myself. That goes well beyond my actions too. Most importantly I have control over my perception of whats going on around me (the things that I can not control).

Controlling my perception makes controlling my reaction to them really easy, so easy that they don't even feel as if I'm reacting at all. I'm just "doing," or taking the action that I choose to take instead of reacting to uncontrollable situations which someone else have created. This includes things like sh1t tests, c0ck blockers, alphas, bad wingmen, women in groups, etc. No matter the situation, no matter the venue, no matter the woman, my trump card is that I have the ability to control my perception of what's going on and how I chose to interact with reality.

Brilliant. When you have cognitive control over your perception, you do or act rather than react. Lets see so.. when your perception is impaired (created by someone else), you seek understanding and without control of perception you react. Do I have this right?

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Brilliant. When you have cognitive control over your perception, you do or act rather than react.

:yes:

Lets see so.. when your perception is impaired (created by someone else), you seek understanding and without control of perception you react. Do I have this right?

Not quite. My perception is only impaired when I try force someone else's perception of reality unto my own when it's different than my perception (incongruence). Why should I do that? There are a lot of confused people out there, I'd rather not partake in their confusion.

Now this is not to say that I wouldn't try to understand their perception but unless it feels congruent to my nature, I'm not going to change my frame, my perception. Women have their "b1tch shield," why can't we have a "DJ shield?" Fair is fair, right?

 

[reset]

DJ-sheild. Love it.

This is what I've been thinking about, especially today. All of it, everything, the oneitis, the validation from women, the job that frustrates me, living situation... basically how I FEEL about life... it's all in my head, and how I'm perceiving my world and drawing conclusions which cause me to think a certain way. It's not like my past oneitis is out there with a voo-doo doll poking pins in me.... she's not even around but I keep her alive (and all the other things that bother me) by choosing to think about them in a certain way (choosing to think about them period). They have ZERO power in themselves. The only meaning is the meaning I choose to give to it. It's all my perception.

We literally have all the power, it just seems like things outside of ourselves have power. They have no power until we choose to give them meaning.

Of course most of this is a learned reaction so it's a habit to choose to give similar events similar meanings. So I'm learning to unlearn.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

...Of course most of this is a learned reaction so it's a habit to choose to give similar events similar meanings. So I'm learning to unlearn.

1. Define your authentic state; the way that you want to feel naturally, the person who'd you like to be naturally, effortlessly.
2. Picture that state vividly and full of detail (using NLP helps).
3. Project that state around you about the length of your arms and keep it there.
4. When you interact with people or have thoughts which shifts or impedes that state:
   1. Stop - Don't react.
   2. Think - Recognize that the experience is attempting to change your natural state
   3. ACT - From within yourself, choose the best way that you (not them) would like to act (not react) which is congruent with your natural state

Think about wanting to stand in a boat that is bobbing on the water. In order to keep your balance during the undulating waves you first feel the wave, you recognize that it's positioning your body in a manner in which you could fall, then you shift your body position in order to stay upright; all the while you are able to stay upright, because of your prior choice to stay upright, no matter which way the waves moved the boat.

 

[reset]

Thanks Francisco. I hear you. I like where this is heading.

3-- do you mean like seeing energy around me? I'm imagining like a white-light force field or something. Is that what you're getting at?

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Thanks Francisco. I hear you. I like where this is heading.

3-- do you mean like seeing energy around me? I'm imagining like a white-light force field or something. Is that what you're getting at?

Whatever works for you. It's about you and for you. Own it, make it yours. If colors work well for you consider using different colors if you have multiple states (confident, funny, charismatic, etc). Since you liked the term "DJ Shield," you can imagine a huge Roman shield if you'd like. Remember, you're in "the theater of your mind." The mind is a powerful thing. Use yours to your advantage or someone else will use it against you.

 

[reset]

Cool. I've been watching 300 and I like the way the guy handles himself. That and all the "warrior" stuff that's been going around.

Ok so I'm just going to write out this authentic self and make it as clear as possible so I can indentify with it.

Thanks.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Cool. I've been watching 300 and I like the way the guy handles himself. That and all the "warrior" stuff that's been going around.

Ok so I'm just going to write out this authentic self and make it as clear as possible so I can indentify with it.

Thanks.

I think that's a good state use to deal with what you're currently dealing with at work. It may be a bit rough when approaching women though although women do fancy men wielding large weapons.

 

[reset]

Lol. I'll have to switch on my inner Bond persona for that.

But I need that confidence that comes from choosing to walk away from something that made me miserable, and facing my fear of change and moving on with my career, which I intend to do ASAP. I know I carry that around with me. That will translate to more confidence all around.