Maann is anyone here as *****/AFC as me :(

[fruitopiax]

Ok today I was sitting down in this study area, when this girl showed up and sat next to me, not gonna go into details, but I knew I could have talked to her and probably got a #, but I didn't. Why? Because behind me were two other girls and in front (not visible, a small wall there, but hearable) where two other people (a guy and a hot girl). So I was hesitant to try and chat her up in that situation.. which is lame. All I did was ask her if she had a pencil, and she looked around for one for a bit, and then sorta smiled and said "hah it was right in my pocket". I then took the pencil and left for abit to check out the computer. When I came back 35-40 mins later she was still there, but lay her head down, with no books out. When I got back she stayed around for awhile and then just left as it ws getting kinda late. It wasn't even really my being afraid of rejection, cause if it had just been us two, I'm sure I woulda have gone ahead and at least tried, even if only for the experience, but the other people there... anybody else like this? How did you get over it?

 

[synergy1]

I used to be like this, like most guys on this forum.

How did I get over it? Stop thinking and hypothesizing over banal little events. You are succumbing to analysis paralysis. Girls give you the "look" that tells you its on. When you think its on, go with your god given animal instinct and assume it is. Go talk to them and see how they respond.

Don't make excuses. Execute, and keep moving forward.

 

[MacAvoy]

3 second rule. The pointof the 3 second rule is to encourage you to approach women fast enough to keep your internal voice from talking you out of it and and to avoid hesitation. You do not want a woman to see you hesitate. The longer you hesitate, the more insecure and sappy you appear. Also, hesitation creates an added sense of nervousness to your mental state and gives her time to size you up and possibly decide not to talk to you - a personality trait you do not want to portray when approaching women.

Just do it. Go! Act in 3 second seconds as the default rule, even if you have no idea how you will continue. If you don't have an opener or opening line in mind by the time you're in front of her, at least just say "Hi". If you act in 3 second seconds, she will notice it, no matter where she just came in from' or where you came from' or even how you passed by each other. She will see the spontaneity and decisiveness in your approach and it can only work in your favor. If you wait, hesitate, then decide to approach, you put yourself in a weaker state. Hesitating will give your self-doubt a chance to create imaginary of bad outcomes and add undue insecurity to your approach.

The other thing you can do is Don Juan Bootcamp. Its 5th down on the list, instructions are available in PDF or Word format, its great for learning how to approach and getting over initial fears.

 

[Nygard]

Yes brother, I was. That's why you're here, in the right place.

 

[Daddy The Pimp]

3 second rule. The pointof the 3 second rule is to encourage you to approach women fast enough to keep your internal voice from talking you out of it and and to avoid hesitation. You do not want a woman to see you hesitate. The longer you hesitate, the more insecure and sappy you appear. Also, hesitation creates an added sense of nervousness to your mental state and gives her time to size you up and possibly decide not to talk to you - a personality trait you do not want to portray when approaching women.

Just do it. Go! Act in 3 second seconds as the default rule, even if you have no idea how you will continue. If you don't have an opener or opening line in mind by the time you're in front of her, at least just say "Hi". If you act in 3 second seconds, she will notice it, no matter where she just came in from' or where you came from' or even how you passed by each other. She will see the spontaneity and decisiveness in your approach and it can only work in your favor. If you wait, hesitate, then decide to approach, you put yourself in a weaker state. Hesitating will give your self-doubt a chance to create imaginary of bad outcomes and add undue insecurity to your approach.

The other thing you can do is Don Juan Bootcamp. Its 5th down on the list, instructions are available in PDF or Word format, its great for learning how to approach and getting over initial fears.

Exactly . Dont overthink . Just do it .

Approach in 3 seconds . Eye contact , smile and approach .

Even if u get rejected , no problem . It would be great exercise . Just smile and back off or continue what u were doing .

And dont worry about the others that hear you . They will think WOOO I WISH I WAS LIKE HIM . I know this cuz ive been here - wishing to be like some guys .

 

[DavenJuan]

exactly ...

3 second rule is gold.

just do it.

another thing...

eliminate the fear. dont talk to her expecting to try and get the digits. chat her up for mere entertainment.

im assuming if you were in study area you were somewhat bored as her considering her head was down.

have fun. she has tats...AND??? she is a female....AND??

Practice approaches on anyone and everyone.

starting today, go up to old women, old men, young women, clerks, cashiers, tellers, strangers on the street. give yourself 3 seconds to ATLEAST say hi, ....blah blah?

get over your approach anxiety. and remember that life is too short to not have a bit of fun.

 

[Squiggly Sponge]

Whatever you do, don't beat yourself up over these things, sometimes you're off your game/ are having a bad day/ whatever. And don't think, just do the damn thing! When you hesitate bad things happen!