Lying and Cheating are not the Answers

[Bible_Belt]

There have been a few recent threads where it seems like either lying to new women or cheating on a current relationship are the best answers for the original poster's problems. Deception always works, but never for very long.

The problem with lying is that it is an inherently submissive gesture. Lying means that you care more about the other person's approval than your own integrity. We debate a lot on this site about what is alpha behavior, but I can only see lying as submissive beta behavior. To be alpha would be to have to attitude of "here's how it is. If you don't like it, then there is the door."

It doesn't matter if you're trying to date while broke and jobless, or if you want to fvck a new girl while still in a relationship. You've probably heard the expression of "honesty is the best policy." Despite the cliche, it's true. But no one ever told you to follow that with 'and if the b!tch doesn't like it then she can fvck off.' Lying is submissive behavior that will get you nowhere.

 

[DonJuan_DeRosco]

I agree.

Also, once you start the lies, it's easy to lose track of them and you'll get found out yourself.

Best be truthful, but strong.

Lying is submissive, as it means you are not man enough to use/confront the truth.

 

[TizZle]

I believe both honesty and loyalty are both masculine traits.

 

[Julius_Seizeher]

"Oh what a tangled web we weave, when first we practice to deceive."

Lying helps us avoid discomfort from all its various sources, so I further contend that lying is weak and unmanly.

 

[Rogue]

I'm a good liar but I rarely verbally lie, because telling the truth is usually easier, simpler, and more enjoyable. But there are two basic types of lies and one type is omission.

If withholding information is lying, if allowing a woman's inferential assumptions of you, based upon your observable persona and life, to run counter to the whole truth is lying, then I 'lie' on a regular basis. The fact is there are truths which frankly are none of a woman's business, especially if it doesn't directly affect my relations with her. There are things I will be openly truthful if the subject is breached but there is no obligation to pre-emptively bring it up. There are times I will take a calculated risk, like discussing marijuana, when a disclosure may provide positive benefits (e.g. the girl is a suspected stoner), but otherwise it's best to withhold. After all, unless I were to show up stoned, my discreetly leading a double life wouldn't affect her. If a girl were to stumble upon my stash after six months and protests, then it was a good six months and well worth it.

Law 12: Use Selective Honesty and Generosity to Disarm your Victim

One sincere and honest move will cover over dozens of dishonest ones.  Open-hearted gestures of honesty and generosity bring down the guard of even the most suspicious people.  Once your selective honesty opens a hole in their armor, you can deceive and manipulate them at will.  A timely gift – a Trojan horse – will serve the same purpose.

 

[SoldMySoul]

Lying is just not in my nature and it is hard for me to do. I wish many more people were like this. I have never lied to impress anyone!!! Nor have I lied to get laid. In the past I never had to... but it crossed my mind as of late because of my unfortunate circumstances, but my conscious took over and take me as I am, or fvck you is my thought. For now, I will just do w/out until I can iron out my life. Maybe patience is a man's best virtue.

 

[KingofHearts]

I really enjoy reading Roissy's blog, but I have a hard time going along with some of his suggestions. And you put into words what i've been thinking about guys that lie, manipulate, cheat or steal to get an advantage on the competition (with women, business, sports etc.) - it's the very definition of beta. The more you use deceit to gain an advantage, the further you separate yourself from your identity. And that wears down on your self esteem and confidence after a while

 

[Scars]

Anytime I cheated I was honest about it. "I know you're probably going to hate me and want to break up with me, but I slept with/kissed Cindy blah blah." It always seemed like the girlfriend got even MORE attracted to me. Granted, they were upset for awhile.. But if you know how to play a womans emotions, its really easy to get them to forgive you for some fvcked up **** you've done.

I can see where you're coming from about the whole lying thing.. but I don't lie for validation or approval. I do it to avoid drama. I've lied and I never got caught. Is that still wrong? I've cheated and never got caught. This was because I lied about it. It saved me a world of headaches.

If you've found a good girl with all the right qualities and you don't want to jeopardize it then don't cheat. But if you're already cheating.. then chances are you don't really take the relationship that seriously anyway, and could probably care less if you lose the girl. After all, you already got a rebound lined up, and you know she puts out already!

-Scars

 

[zekko]

The problem with lying is that it is an inherently submissive gesture. Lying means that you care more about the other person's approval than your own integrity. We debate a lot on this site about what is alpha behavior, but I can only see lying as submissive beta behavior. To be alpha would be to have to attitude of "here's how it is. If you don't like it, then there is the door."

This is one of the best posts I've read here, Bible Belt, I rep you.
Unfortunately, I don't think morality has much bearing on being alpha. Being alpha is more of a matter of brute force. But I agree with you that lying to get laid is putting the girl's golden pvssy before your own integrity, and smacks of insecurity.

Wouldn't an alpha go boldly forth and proclaim his needs to a woman? This idea of lying for sex sounds more beta to me also, more like sneaking around in the shadows in the hopes of snaring some prey.

But if your goal is only pump and dumps (as it appears to be for a lot of guys on here), deception probably works as well as anything. This behavior appeals to the most base animal instincts, so it's no surprise morality doesn't play a huge part in achieving it.

 

[Proselytiser]

On the other hand, lying is leading someone astray. Lie all you want if it works for you, just do it well.

 

[Blue Phoenix]

Good points B Belt!

BTW there´s a site called: http://www.cheatingways.com/

Wow. It´s good to read it so we can identify them asap.

 

[thedude4242]

yes there are some good comments.

 

[nkh78h]

Yeah, I would not lie either.

There are many articles that discuss whethe it's OK to lie about the age; their general message is that "it may get you your dream girl, but it may also be the reason you lose her."

However, I think it's OK to exploit things that are open to interpretation.

For example: it is OK to say you are in your 20's when you are 29 years and 8 months old, or that you "recently" finished college when you're from the class of 2006, etc. It is NOT OK to say that you are 21 when you are 28.

Just my $0.02.