LTR Question Regarding C&F also

[INXS]

Suppose you get involved in a serious relationship with a woman, and she was smart, and every now and then you drop a sweet remark her way, or do a few sweet things every so often, which she really appreciates. And when you do she says stuff like, "This is the side of you I really like...the real you." Even though she is saying that, if you were to suddenly be like that all of the time, and just ditched the C&F all together, her feelings for you would likely change, correct? If so, can someone explain why? Is it all about wanting what you aren't sure you can have? I'd love to hear any thoughts/rants/random remarks about this topic. Thanks everyone!:woo:

 

[sexy_kuta]

i heard that if u act too much of a chump they get turned off..

 

[Sean O]

That will only happen to people who THINK they're real DJs, but in reality have just studied techniques for pickups and quick lays. If you really are a man, you'll only have to put up your "game" early on. As the relationship matures, you can and SHOULD ease off of the techniques and **** and just be the confident, alpha male that you naturally are. That alone will keep her with you.

In other words, the most important stuff on this site isn't the techniques, but the PRINCIPLES. Be confident and strong, don't supplicate, live your life how YOU want to, etc.. These are the things that will allow you to have successful LTRs.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

That will only happen to people who THINK they're real DJs, but in reality have just studied techniques for pickups and quick lays. If you really are a man, you'll only have to put up your "game" early on. As the relationship matures, you can and SHOULD ease off of the techniques and **** and just be the confident, alpha male that you naturally are. That alone will keep her with you.

In other words, the most important stuff on this site isn't the techniques, but the PRINCIPLES. Be confident and strong, don't supplicate, live your life how YOU want to, etc.. These are the things that will allow you to have successful LTRs.

I'm sorry but this is a load of crap. Although I agree that techniques alone will only get you so far but why the fvck would you stop doing what got you two together in the first place? That doesn't make any sense.

Couples complain all the time that their relationships have gotten boring because they don't do anything any more. Guess why? They stopped doing the things and being the people that attracted them to one another in the first place!

Stop acting like a DJ and actually become one, make it your lifestyle and live with it! Why revert to AFC ways after the DJ way got you the girl? It just doesn't make any sense.

 

[Sean O]

I'm sorry but this is a load of crap. Although I agree that techniques alone will only get you so far but why the fvck would you stop doing what got you two together in the first place? That doesn't make any sense.

Couples complain all the time that their relationships have gotten boring because they don't do anything any more. Guess why? They stopped doing the things and being the people that attracted them to one another in the first place!

Read my post again, bro. All I was saying was that, assuming you accomplish the true purpose of this site (becoming a real man, or in other words a DJ, just like you said in your post), you don't need to do all the PUA **** like push/pull, fractionating compliments and such to keep your girl. She'll be attracted to you for being the man that you are. I NEVER said to revert to an AFC. The confusion may be that you and I have different ideas of what a "technique" refers to.

Stop acting like a DJ and actually become one, make it your lifestyle and live with it! Why revert to AFC ways after the DJ way got you the girl? It just doesn't make any sense.

Exactly .

 

[d2j]

I'm sorry but this is a load of crap. Although I agree that techniques alone will only get you so far but why the fvck would you stop doing what got you two together in the first place? That doesn't make any sense.

Couples complain all the time that their relationships have gotten boring because they don't do anything any more. Guess why? They stopped doing the things and being the people that attracted them to one another in the first place!

Stop acting like a DJ and actually become one, make it your lifestyle and live with it! Why revert to AFC ways after the DJ way got you the girl? It just doesn't make any sense.

Read that 30 times over

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Don't feel scared to show a bit of weakness now and then, it adds character (but don't be a wimp either ).

Guy's I'm going to let you in on a little secret. In a relationship it isn't necessary (or advisable) to show weakness in yourself. What's less self defeating and more effective is showing your appreciation of her which can be easily done without looking weak.

Just something to think about.

 

[Desdinova]

Even though she is saying that, if you were to suddenly be like that all of the time, and just ditched the C&F all together, her feelings for you would likely change, correct?

Trust, fun, and intimacy are part of the meat of the relationship. Romance is the spice that makes it a bit more "flavorful". Now with that in mind; just because you like steak seasoning, would you eat an entire plate full of it? Of course not, and she wouldn't either.

Too much spice will ruin a perfectly good relationship.

Don't feel scared to show a bit of weakness now and then, it adds character (but don't be a wimp either ).

Mr. Elor is right. You can't be strong 100% of the time because you're human. The blows of life can take a toll on a human being, and you're going to break down sooner or later. That doesn't mean you shouldn't fight it, but when you need some time to let your human emotion out, do so. Keeping it inside all the time can take a toll on you mentally, and even physically.

The occasional breakdown is fine as long as she doesn't see it too often. Just from experience, my lady can tolerate me being sick in bed for about one day. When it lasts longer, she finds it harder to bear seeing such a strong human being in such a weak state.

Women KNOW that you're a human being. They KNOW that you're going to have your weak moments. They actually like seeing that you're only human. What they don't like is when you become a whining, crying little girl.

 

[Tomatoes]

If someone can come up with a COMPLETLY LOGICAL reason why when you act like you like a girl she will not like you and when your a **** she will like you......I will give you "The meaning of life" as a trade.....

What happened to the good old relationship where you can both love each other without pretending....neg hits....and all the craap.


Sarge On!

 

[Sean O]

What happened to the good old relationship where you can both love each other without pretending....neg hits....and all the craap.

Dude, that's a pretty bleak outlook... it's always been possible for two people to genuinely love each other. Things like neg-hits exist to create an initial attraction. That attraction is usually enough to get you a phone number or a lay, but if you want to have a meaningful relationship you really do have to meet the "right" kind of person - someone who you are attracted to and who is attracted to you in return, but whom you also share a deeper connection with.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

I'm gonna disagree with you here.

Think about TV and film characters, why do we like them, why do we feel sympathy towards characters, why do we care about them?

Let's talk about reality and not mass media, you gotta wonder about people who base their lives on television entertainment.

Here's a test for you, ask your female friends their list of the most important characteristics of a guy that they would date. Note how many of them actually lists "shows weakness" as a top characteristic.

Once you become more experienced you will realize that women want to be with men who they feel can handle whatever happens in their life. I believe it was David dAngelo that coined the perfect response when a woman comments on some type of turmoil in your life. The best response is "It's nothing I can't handle." Now you tell me a line that shows weakness that is better than that response.

Men are supposed to be men, nothing good in the long run ever comes from showing weakness or vulnerability. This does not mean that a guy can't be empathic about a situation, but no matter what he handles his own. Be it getting a ding in his new BMW, loosing $100 on the Sunday game or taking a line drive to the nuts, it's never more than he can handle.

 

[Man Of Adventure]

Why not continue being this person?

To me, being the person I am is being the person I am.

What Ive become through what Ive incorporated into by being is the person I am now.

Why is being ****y and funny a technique when it could be a part of yourself? This whole concept is made so you can get a grasp of what comes out of your mouth and is percieved in the mind of a woman.

If you make the ****y and funny attitude a part of you this will never become an issue, youll never want to stop it because its fun on both sides, and its just brings out good feelings for both of you.

If its not hurting her (because youre not coming off as a douchbag) and she enjoys it, and you enjoy being this way towards her...continue being this way.