LTR breakup.

[arcilitei34]

Well as of yesterday a six month relationship between me and my Gf just ended, I kind of saw that this was coming, so I guess I prepared for the worst. The funny thing is, I dont feel happy nor sad. I feel numb, I no longer feel like the person I once used to be, is this normal?
Great way to start the day off though, afterwards I went bowling and drinking with some friends to try to forget about it, worked pretty well until I whipped the bowling ball into some other guy's lane due to frustration.
At least im grateful for the learning experiance that has happened to me, and this'll probably determine how I grow as a person. I'm supposed to meet up with her today to get my stuff back from her house, and her's from mine, I can't say im looking forward to it.
We had alot of serious fights in the last one or two weeks, so I think this might have led to the end of things.
When this happened yesterday, I told her "I hope we can still be friends", and she said something that I didn't really think she'd say, but she said "In the future we might be together, but not right now, I need some time to myself", I wonder if anyone has any idea what this might mean. During the phone conversation I acted really fine(I must say I am taking this really well) I didn't whine, or complain, or even beg, it's what she wanted and a part of me wanted that as well, and I respect that.
Well what im planning to do is to just move on, try not to think about her, not to call her or anything, I hope thats the right move.

If anyone has any insight on all of this, i'd be grateful, thanks! =)

 

[Dukester]

get over her man. the best thing for you to do, is go out w/ your friends and get your mind off of her.
who gives a shiz nit about what she said "future we might be together" that's a load of bull sh!t. it's just a way of her trying to make you feel less bad, and justify what she did.

get drunk if u have to, but get your mind off of her, and move on. i know that's hard to hear, and it took me almost 4 months to get over my ex of 6.5 months. but now, i'm a successful DJ, and i got the pimp juice bak- it just takes time

good luck

 

[LikRetsam]

LTR break ups hurt hard. What she said, in simple english, is that she still likes you but circumstances didn't permit. This won't happen over night. You'll be thinking about her alot, no matter how hard you try not to. Getting with other girls is moot. Time is all you have for awhile. Been there, am there. It sucks, don't even look to be her friend just try to go on with your life. If you get close again one day, so be it. But until then, live your life without.

 

[Interpol]

Originally posted by arcilitei34
she said "In the future we might be together, but not right now, I need some time to myself", I wonder if anyone has any idea what this might mean.

It means she didn't want to hurt your feelings.

Time to move on...

 

[LikRetsam]

Re: Re: LTR breakup.

Originally posted by Interpol
It means she didn't want to hurt your feelings.

I don't agree.

Sounds like a bit of regret and forced action to me. Normally, I would agree with it meaning absolutly nothing.

It's really irrelevant since our Don Juan is moving along

 

[arcilitei34]

Well I saw her today in getting my stuff back from her house, and giving her things back to her. It was fuucking hard, I almost broke down. Needless to say, i just couldn't smile when I saw her. Normally however, I usually go down to where her neighbourhood is to see her, but for some reason she came up to see me, it was kinda odd.
When I saw her I asked her a few simple questions that I needed to know which was.

1) "How do you feel about me?" - her reply: "I really care about you"
2) "Do you still want to be with me?" - her reply(which sounded really sincere): "Not right now, right now I need some time to myself, time for my family, my friends, maybe someday"

Afterwards I told her that there were no regrets, however I did have one. I really cared about this girl, and because for some reason all DJ's should never ever ever tell the girl that they love them, or any indication of the sort. I felt like kicking myself that time. But I told her that the only regret I had was, I never really told her how I felt about her, and I was going to on our 6 month anniversary but we got into a fight and never got the chance.

We then gave each other our things back and she asked me if I wanted any of the stuffed animals I gave her back, I told her they were gifts for her. She then gave me a hug and we both went our seperate ways and I just about broke down. It fvcking kills and I know this isnt just going to go away in a day.

My friend was with me at the time and she's a lesbian, but when I was leaving to my seperate way my friend hopped onto the same train as my gf, well exgf now, and my friend asked her talked to her even though it was against my wishes. Apparently she still likes me and that she really does want to be with me, but there's just alotta shiit in her life, she's stressed and crowded or something like that. I'd be lying to myself right now if I said I was ok.

 

[LikRetsam]

It's hard dude. Don't listen to any depressive music of the sorts, not in this state.

It's not un-DJ to tell your girlfriend how you feel about her. It's retarded to hold anything against doing that. You gotta be strong. There will [eventually] be other girls you'll care more for one day. Just remember that this was a valuable learning experience and next time you'll do better, no matter how you feel about your ex.

Everything is in your hands. The more you think about her, the longer she'll be 'there'. You gotta one day man up and tell yourself you no longer want to spend your life in regret or sorrowful over what happened, you no longer want her in your every thought. You want to be free again. So tell her to get the **** out of your head.

Good luck, Don Juan.

 

[Balanced]

You'll be alright. I recommend losing yourself in a book or a videogame or something. You can't think about it. Also think about all the things you have going for you, I don't know you but as a Dj you are way ahead of most guys our age. Easy on the booze tho once in a while is cool but don't let it become your crutch. If you can't stop thinking about it reframe it and you just gotta say, damn this hurts but it was worth it. Thats all you can do, no regrets but now its time i move on. I will prolly be rereading this when my ltr ends.

 

[splinterkb]

The faster you forget, the better. Just do stuff with the boys for a while... thats usually the best remedy. Guys usually wont bring up **** like that, so you're set there. Have a real good time, and realize that you don't need her, or want her. Try spittin some game at some other b****s to move forward quick.

 

[Sammo]

Listen to her man, "Maybe in the future we can be together", what the **** givers her the right to say when you guys are 'on' or 'off. She's ****ed it, you to will never be together again, you dont deserve that ****. Why do you want to be her friend? The only reason for you to be her friend is if you want some of her hot friends. Being friends with your ex's suck, being friends with the majority of the female population sucks man.

Toughen up cheif.

 

[edgewater]

listen to raggae man. It works.

 

[arcilitei34]

Well, i've discovered a small little tidbit that was actually kind of interesting and is actually helping me move on a little better. I found out that she really is stressing out, from school and such, and that her parent's have seperated. Oddly enough, it almost makes me feel kind of better about moving on.

 

[LikRetsam]

In which case she eliminated her friend because she evaluated him to be more trouble than he was worth in these times.

Her loss

 

[Juggalo]

I'm kinda in the same situation. I only went out with my girlfriend for a little over a month though. We got really close because I hadn't known the rules to follow for that of a DJ or anything but it's hard on me too. I know it probably doesn't even compare to your 6 month relationship, but with me.....me and my girlfriend weren't comfortable around each other until after we broke up and now we're closer than we've ever been, but we're friends and she doesn't want to get back together because of some **** involved that's preventing us.

Stay strong and try to focus on other things. Hang out with your friends and everytime you think about her.....do something to get your mind off of her.