LR: Thursday morning fun.

[Rho]

The otherday I decided to fvck my bed, you know the gap between the bottom and top mattress? Yeah, I read on the internet ages ago that it was a good idea.

When I made the decision that it was about to go down I got one of those bag things that drug dealers put drugs in, with the intention of filling it up with lube and putting it in that gap between the mattresses.

I couldnt find any lube so I used shampoo instead, that sh1t lathered up and went ALL over the place. Also I think it did something to me because I've been pissing fire for a couple of days.


So yeah, I f-closed my bed, am I weird?

 

[dannyegg4575]

WTF? are you like 12?
fukc man, I'm starting to think that this place is getting messed up...

 

[macallik]

I think the bed gave you chlamydia man. Get tested

 

[macfuque]

props bro but keep raising your standards. try the sofa tomorrow

 

[drtk]

For some reason I think this guy has way more game than Wutang. Props on getting a new FB.

 

[guywhoneedshelp]

While I find it hard to believe this (although I did **** my leather couch when I was like 14) you might want to buy a product called the fleshlight. Look it up online.

 

[Vlad the Impaler]

Was it a queen size mattress? Whatever you do try not to get oneitis for your mattress.

 

[Credos]

:crackup: The post itself is super, and the comments just complete it

 

[Shake it-Break it]

Shampoo irriates your skin with too much direct contact--that's why you're pissing fire. You could've used crisco!

I suggest not fvcking the bed anymore, though it's fine that you were curious...

 

[Jokerlsk]

Get a bunkbed, that way you can write a LR tomorrow and call it

LR:Friday Morning Threesome

I l'dmao. HAHAHAHAHA

 

[antidonjuan]

props bro but keep raising your standards. try the sofa tomorrow

great laugh material

 

[pokerlife]

Your not weird bro your just human/ Cant be worse than when i was 13 my friend told me he got his tom tom stuck in a shampoo bottle

 

[Stéphane]

OMG I laughed so much

 

[antidonjuan]

man, it's about the experience
they key to success in anything: experience, experience, experience
i'm seeing that you are getting more and more experience and you are the real deal dude. f*cking your bed? dude you are not weird you are just being a man.

remember pook?: embrace your sexuality!!! you are very different from others and very imaginitive; using shampoo? dude u got some imagination and u are the real stud in this community.

pissing fire: you are a real man

keep up the good work bro~

 

[Sun Tzu]

When the bed and the sofa don't do it for you anymore, try the vegetable juicer and the blender.

 

[connor32]

microwave a cantaloupe. i swear i didnt personally fvck a cantaloupe. ..........now everyone is gonna think i microwaved a cantaloupe. but seriously dont microwave a cantaloupe. (you could burn your d!ck). you know i recently posted for serious advice on a chick and got like 5 replies. this moron has gotten 19 including my reply. the irony...wow!

 

[dannyegg4575]

why don't you cut a hole through a steak? that would give you a much "softer" experience. Not to mention more "meat" involved.

Or, try the American Pie thing where you do it with a pie? hm..

 

[Vlad the Impaler]

Forget the bed.., try and bang something that's alive.. like the dog.

 

[antidonjuan]

this should go to the archieve, can't stop thinking about the original poster...