LR: (Lay Report) Papa's Quebec Adventures with Mafia*****

[Pap]

[I've been traveling for quite awhile and returned to university now...so I'm catching up on field-reports...as I've been only posting in the Lounge and P-L-A-Y (LA List)...but I've been going out every night and will write FRs daily...and I may post here again as I love the Game]

PAPA’S QUEBEC ADVENTURES WITH MAFIA*****

Episode 1: (The First Night with Mafia*****)

2:30AM: Papa’s Unsuspected Meeting of Mafia*****

After the Montreal Mystery Workshop, I went with Mystery, No9, and TylerDurden to Cliff’s Montreal Lair Meeting and then I went to Cliff’s to get my baggage ready to take a bus to Toronto. However, we didn’t realize that the last bus was at midnight. So TD and I decided to go to an afterbar and wait it out until 7:30am for the next bus instead of returning to Cliff’s house and waking him up.

The taxi-driver in our cab to the bus station told us about a club called Aria that was supposed to be open until 7am. So we went to the Crown Plaza Hotel across the street from the Montreal Bus Terminal and checked our baggage in the lobby by pretending that we were checking out of the hotel. Then we walked to Aria. It was pretty difficult to find Aria.

As we walked down the street, we walked by several bums, yelling crazy people, and prostitutes soliciting everywhere. I felt like we were going to get jumped by someone and robbed any second. We asked to chicks that looked like prostitutes in front of a sexcoteque (porn cinema) where to find Aria and they blew it off. We were about to give up, but we found two normal looking AMOGs that told us where to find Aria.

When we get to Aria, TD and I saw a group of 6 guys and 1 girl standing in front of the closed club. Arghhhhh. I am getting extremely frustrated and pissed, but I don’t want to wait 4 hours to go to the Bus Terminal on these horrible streets. I have been dealing with the massive stress of workshop organizing and pressure of needing top form pickup performance in front of other people ALL the time, and it was getting to me.

So TD and I start talking about what to do and we get interrupted by a girl. Supposedly, TD talked to the girl earlier and talked about her friends earlier and said they were boring and he labeled her as a typical French Canadian Girl.

HB: Hey, have you seen the Matrix II.
Papa: Yeah. It’s cool.

She continues talking and telling some story-telling. I feel like she just did an indirect opener on me and she is macking me.

 

[Pap]

I’m thinking that she must be some hustler. She is kinoing TD and I and talking to all the other guys also. Some of the guys ditch her and she is talking to all of us saying, “Guys, someone come to Red Light with me. Please take me there. It will be sooooo much fun.” I’ve heard a lot about the Montreal Sex Industry so I’m thinking this girl is a stripper or prostitute promoting a Red Light District Club. Well, that’s my introduction to Mafia*****. I’m thinking to myself, “****. I don’t want to deal with this ****, but going to a Red Light District Strip Club would be a helluva lot better than standing on the street for 4 hours around the bus station with all the street vigilantes roaming around and waiting for trouble. So TD and I agree that we should check it out.

I flag down a taxi cab and I get into the cab with TylerDurden and Mafia*****. TD asks me to ask if one of the other guys wants to get into the cab with us to make the cab cheaper; however, after I ask them, none of them decided to join us. So we take off in the cab with the chick and tell the cab driver to take us to Red Light. Mafia***** says the club is only 10 minutes away in Laval, an island off Montreal and I think she is lying and that it has to be much farther. My mind is thinking that she is probably some prostitute or stripper that wants to hook us up with some ghetto *****s from the island Laval’s strip clubs, where I hear that American visitors frequent to **** cheap hot French *****s. I hear TD and her talk to the cab driver about Red Light and TD tells me that it’ll be a normal club. I’m hoping that it’s not a strip club, but my doubts were not laid to rest yet.

I noticed that Mafia***** is talking a lot. She also starts talking to me. She says a lot of C&F comments and I tell her that she is a bad girl and a bad influence.

Papa: [mild body check to dance music]
Mafia*****: bla blab la
TD: Oh, this girl is like Celine Dion.
Mafia*****: Hahahaha.
Papa: Naw. More like Britney Spears. Uh, oh. Look out.
Mafia*****: [light punch to my armi]
Papa: Owwwwww. That’s my weak arm. [light punch to her arm]
Mafia*****: Hey, you are going to give me a bruise. [she punches my arm again]
Papa: [I punch her arm and exchange blows until I just stop and hockey body check her lightly]

After 30 minutes of taxi-driving, and ball-busting between me and the chick, we get to Red Light. It appears to be a large warehouse in the middle of nowhere. Mafia***** gives us $20CAN for the taxi and jumps out of the cab. That’s more than her share cuz the cab was only $15. We enter the club and Mafia***** asks me to pay the $5 cover charge (for girls) and I agree because she overpaid the taxi. I then pay my $10 cover with TD.

Mafia*****: Will you please stay with me in the club?
Papa: Sure.
Mafita*****: Yes. Don’t leave me until I find my friends.

The coat check person wanted me to check my jacket, but I walk past into the main area and see a loud techno-style dance club. It’s a rave party. Mafia***** is nearby and she wants to roam around. She had been giving me IOIs all night and I’m thinking that this girl was very sexy. Suddenly, a security bouncer pulls me aside and says I need to check my coat. So I tell Mafia***** to wait and pay my $2CAN to get my coat checked.

TD pulls me aside and wants to talk before I go into the main room to meet up with Mafia*****.

TylerDurden: Dude, what are your objectives here, man? This club is way to loud to sarge. So is your objective here to **** this girl [Mafia*****]?
Papa: Well, I’m just here to have a good time, but yeah, I’ll **** her.
TylerDurden: Well, I want you to tell me what your objectives are because you are either going to chill with her the whole time because if you let her out of your sight, she will party with someone else and you will lose her…or you will sarge others with me.
Papa: Well, let’s stick with her for now and see what happens.

I go into the main dancefloor area and look around for Mafia*****. She is dancing happily on a platform. I grab for her to pull her off the platform and she kneels quickly to get ready to hop down and I accidentally grab her breasts and then pull her off the platform. She smiles, grabs my arm, and does a cute semi-twirl hip-hop movement. Then she grabs my arm and starts walking.

Mafia*****: I wanted you to see me dance sexily up there for awhile.
Papa: [smiles and thinks ‘yeah, baby…you are mine.’]

We walk around the main dance floor, which is a loud dance floor in the middle of the room with a walking area around the dance-floor in the rectangular room. At the other end of the dancefloor is a bar. I grab a bottle of water and see Mafia***** go passed the bar to a staircase upstairs. I turn around and look to see if TylerDurden is around and I think that I lose them.

Mafia*****: [stops walking and turns around to face me] Come upstairs with me. I’m going to look for my friends.

We look around and I’m hoping that she doesn’t find her friends because it’s so much easier to sarge this chick without having to occupy the obstacles in this loud club. We walk up and down the couches upstairs looking for her friends. She doesn’t see them so she goes to the railing to look at the dancefloor below. We chit chat for a little while staring at the dancefloor. Suddenly, she does a happy yelp and runs down the stairs.

Papa: Hey Superkid! What’s up?!?
Mafia*****: [already halfway down the staircase stops, looks up at me with an empty stare] Nothing. [then she continues]
Papa: [confused, I walk after her as she rushes back onto the dancefloor]

 

[Pap]

Suddenly, I see TylerDurden walking up the staircase in the opposite direction.

TylerDurden: Dude, what’s up. Don’t **** that chick. She’ll be trouble.
Papa: What? Cummon. [thinking I better hurry up cuz TD told me not to let me out of my sight in this 3000 person capacity club because I’d probably lose her]
TylerDurden: You don’t want to hookup with her. Is she on E yet?
Papa: I dunno.
TylerDurden: This girl will only be trouble. Don’t get involved with her. These raver chicks are trouble. Don’t **** her.
Papa: Cummon, man. I can deal.
TylerDurden: Hey, man. That’s right. Just because you ****ed girls that were part of her group, it’s ok. That’s right.
Papa: Cummon, dude. [looking towards the direction of Mafia***** because she is almost out of my sight]
TylerDurden: Sorry to ****block you man, but I just don’t think it’s a good idea for you to get involved with that kind of girl. But if you do, that’s fine. But let it be a lesson to you because I’ve been involved with girls like that.
Papa: She wants to hookup. She opened me.
TylerDurden: Yeah. I know. That’s the only kind of girls that would get with me back when I was an AFC. I’d get with them because I used to go to this kind of environment all the time. It’s bad ****, man, but I’m not going to stop you.
Papa: Ok, man. [and I head my way down the staircase to look for Mafia*****]

I walk around the techno-dancefloor all around and don’t see her. Then I go through a passage way into a lounge with flashy lasers everywhere and can’t find her. So I go into a hip-hop lounge and look for her by walking around the dancefloor and through the dancefloor a couple times and don’t see her anywhere. I see a big white security dude bobbling back and forth to block people from going into a room with a staircase.

I walk by the dude, nod my head and walk right by him. I’m thinking that this room must not be very special (not VIP) cuz he let me in without checking for a stamp or anything. Upstairs, I see few people and two rooms, one of them with a massage table, but nobody getting a massage…and definitely no Mafia*****. So I decide to go downstairs one more time to search.

I see TylerDurden and go up to him to chat.

TylerDurden: Dude, how long do you want to stay here?
Papa: Well, we have 3 hours before the bus.
TylerDurden: Yeah, but I don’t want to sarge this loud club.
Papa: It’s better than on the streets waiting. Cummon.
TylerDurden: Mmmm. Hmm. Well, ok. I guess this lounge is ok.
Papa: Let’s open that two-set over there.

TD and I go into the hallway nearby because we are very close to the girls and we gave them proximity and we thought that it’d be too much of a SOI if we opened them right away. We chill for a few minutes and then I go towards the 2-set because TD and I are about to open them. We sit down on a platform next to them and TD tells me to just chill and let’s open them the “natural way”. TD sits next to the set cuz I want him to open.

While waiting I look around and by coincidence, I look to my other side and sitting right next to me is Mafia*****.

Papa: Hey. There you are. I didn’t think I’d find you.
Mafia*****. Yeah. I can’t find my friends.
[chit chat proceeds and we are getting into wide rapport and obviously the girl is attracted so I’m thinking that I have a guaranteed lay]

TylerDurden: Hey, dude. I am going to get out of here. Are you staying or are you coming with me? I don’t think you should get involved with this girl…and the lay isn’t even guaranteed.
Papa: Hey, bro. I’m staying.
TylerDurden: Alight, man. I guess I’ll just go to Toronto and you give me a call and we’ll work out how we’re going to meet up.
Papa: Sounds good, man.
TylerDurden: Ok. I’m out of here.
Papa: Aight. Cheers.

I continue talking to Mafia***** and then we decide to talk around the danceclub and we dance a little. I don’t get dirty or freaky with her because I don’t want to exhaust her or get her all sweaty so she won’t be too worn out for sex. Some of the people dancing around us are really sweaty and one guy’s sweaty arm brushes up against Mafia*****’s and she says, “Ewww.” Then we continue dancing and then walk around.

We see the dudes that were near Aria and we chat them up a bit.

Mafia*****: Those were your friends, right?
Papa: No.
Mafia*****: Oh, I thought they were your friends?

[I think they might have been her friends from Quebec City]

Then we decide to go upstairs through the door with the white buff security dude and we walk right in and upstairs. The front room is the bar room with couches and the back-room has a lounge area. We chill in the lounge area on a couch by the bathroom. I’m thinking there must be a lot of people using drugs in there and dealing around the club (I later find out that the club just opened up cuz it was shut down for awhile).

We spend the next hour doing the standard comfort-building stuff…talking about who we are, age, and other get-to-know each other stuff…mixed in with a lot of push-pull, qualifying, C&F role-playing, and some demonstrations of magic. I also do some patterning and demonstrations of value using some routines that I created using my Sony Clie.

Mafia***** ends up wanting to smoke a little and I want to get a caffeinated energy drink like Red Bull. So I standup and go to the bar and get an Energy Drink and a package of matches for Mafia*****. When I return to the Lounge, she is talking to some dude. I decide to freeze her out. He ends up pulling out a lighter and smokes and she joins him to smoke. She looks at me and grabs the pillow next to her and put it behind her head.

I’m thinking that this girl is freezing me out now; however, I had already developed attraction and wide rapport for the last few hours so I am not too concerned. I freeze her out and look around the dancefloor. I chill on the couch just chilling and drinking my Energy Drink thinking she might eject soon. I decide to get 3 more energy drinks and go back and forth between drinking and ordering, and walking between the two rooms.

The freeze out wasn’t enough so I decided to start chatting up chicks. All the chicks in the room spoke very little Engligh [unlike Mafia***** who speaks fluent English and French] and after a difficult to understand opener on all 4 girls that I chatted, I had to ask “Do you speak English?”. They would all reply “No” or “Very Little”, but I wanted to continue talking cuz Mafia***** would see me do it and I’d get social proof.

I basically spent 5-15 minutes chatting fluff with each chick, but I remembered Cliff telling me that when you speak English to these primarily French-speaking Quebec chicks, you’ll get more respect from them even if they won’t like it as much. So I reasoned that these girls just liked talking to a foreign exotic American boy about California and whatever.

This still wasn’t enough. So I decided to get another Energy Drink and return to the room. I end up sitting down on the couch across from some AMOG friends of the dude that is talking to Mafia***** and decide to chat them up. I ask about the time and then inquire about the club. I find out that the room I’m in is for VIPs only and that the reason why I’m let in is because everyone in the club thinks the few Asians in the Club are Triads. He also tells me that most of the club is Gangbangers, Drugdealers, addicts, hustlers, and Quebec Mafia Biker Dudes. When I ask how he got in, he just says he knows all the security and I leave it at that. Suddenly Mafia***** comes over with the AMOG and asks, “Do you wanna get out of here?” I say, “Sure.” Then we go downstairs and sit on a leather bench and chat.

We chat for a little bit and then she starts making fun of some of the people sitting on the platforms in the club. I take out my Sony Clie and run Gaydar on them and she laughs. She then ends up playing with Gaydar on many other people. I show her Xenoprobe and my photos and funny videos (video of Mike with Gorilla stuffed animal…and Mike with Owen on his back). She plays with the Gaydar and chats with me for a couple hours.

At 9am, the lights turn on and we go outside of the club. Outside of the club, the sunlight is bright and I put on my red sunglasses.

 

[Pap]

Mafia*****: Hey, let’s go look for my friends. He’s fallen asleep in his car.
Papa: [I’m hoping NO so we can just go to a hookup location whether at her place if she has a place or a hotel] Naw…let’s just grab a cab.
Mafia*****: Just a second.

We look around all over the parking lot and don’t find her friends so I call a cab and tell her that we should go out front. She takes out a flier and gives me the address and I tell the cab to meet us at the club. When we go out to the front, Mafia***** sees her friends’ car and wakes them up and tells them that we called a cab and that she was going with me in a cab.

The cab driver comes by right at this moment and I wave at him and he makes a motion as if he is going to turn around. Mafia ***** gets her bags out of the car and comes with me into the cab. I tell the taxi driver to go the Crown Plaza Hotel across the street from the Montreal Bus Terminal. Mafia***** used to live in Montreal so she helps guide the taxi driver to the hotel in French along the way.

Mafia*****: That was my ride to Quebec. They treat me bad. Ow. I got this bruise.
Papa: Well, stick with me kid and we’ll go a long way.
[Papa sways to music back and forth across the car…I do this in every taxi we get in, but the last night I do this she exclaims… “oW. You are rough.”…I’ve been doing this ever since some chick from NASA Academy-Harvard was doing this]

We chat a bit with some C&F, but very light teasing because we are in RAPPORT right now. Then I decide to qualify her.

Papa: You know, when I first met you I got the impression that you were a wild party chick, but you know, now, that I’ve gotten to know you, I think you have a great energy. I really like your sense of humor, C&F role-playing, C&F frames. You see, I’ve found that living in LA for awhile, I’ve seen that beauty is common, but rare is a positive outlook, a good attitude, and a great sense of humor. And you’ve got that great energy.
Mafia*****: [smiles and swoons]

We chat a bit more and then she says:

Mafia*****: You know, this is for fun. I’ve got a Moroccan boy back in Quebec, but when I’m in Montreal, I’m partying.
Papa: Ok. Sure. [we are very near the hotel]
Mafia*****: Yeah. My boy back home is soo great, but we fight too much and sometimes I just like to have fun.
Papa: [I launch a bunch of patterns based on TD’s BF Destroying language patterns to refrain the dude as a nice guy and to turn all his mysterious behavior into framed insecurities] Yeah. Well, you know, he probably is a nice guy, and he just feels like unleashing all his frustrations and anger on you sometimes because he’s afraid he’ll never find a girl as good as you. So he’s afraid of losing you, but deep down inside, he’s probably a nice guy.
Mafia*****: Yeah. Well, we have such great times together though, sexually. And he has an amazing face that just turns me on.
Papa: Well, you know, he sounds like just another nice guy. He probably gave you a lot of peaks and highs and he’s scared that he just can’t create those tender amazing moments again and so he acts out of insecurities, but deep down inside he’s just a nice guy.
Mafia*****: How old are you?
Papa: 23.
Mafia*****: No way. Show me your ID. You are so mature, too mature for being 23.

When we get to the hotel, I go to the lobby of the hotel and get my luggage. Mafia***** is waiting with her backpack by the hotel elevator.

Upstairs, I tell Mafia*****:

Bla bla

Papa: You know, I was really lucky because I was about to leave at 7:30am and now I’ve met you.
Mafia*****: Yeah. We should stay together and get to know each other now over the next week. I’ll be anything you want me to be…and right now, I’m easy.

So I lean in and kiss her and we end of having sex. It was amazing and I felt sooooo relaxed afterwards, where we took a hot shower together and washed each other. I felt sooo fantastic. We stay up all night talking and listening to music and around lunchtime, the adventure continues. I also get her to dress up for me and video tape her and take her pictures. Damn, she has such a hot body. Whooooo! I love the Game.

 

[Pap]

PAPA’S QUEBEC ADVENTURES WITH MAFIA*****

Episode 2: (Chilling with Pickup-Artists and Ex-Boyfriends)

Around lunchtime, Mafia***** started calling lots of people on the hotel phone. She called her boyfriend to let him know that she will not be home for a few days because she lives with him and said she is staying with a friend from Microsoft (because I told her that I was the president of Microsoft as a joke). However, she also called 3 of her ex-boyfriends who were in Montreal. She even put me on the phone with them.

The weirdest thing was that she actually gave the hotel room to the guys, which weirded me out. I didn’t want angry boyfriends and ex-boyfriends knocking on my door while I’m ****ing their girl. One of her ex-boyfriends flew from Brazil to marry her and she shot him down; another bought a gift overseas for her; and a third one invited her to a party. The strangest thing of all of this was that she actually said that WE would go party.

I started to freak out, but I didn’t want to show it. However, I called backup…Mystery (who was chilling with No9 at Doc’s house). I wanted us to meet up. So I explained peacock theory to the girl by telling her that it’s better to be looked over than to be overlooked, and we should go shopping for funky clothes together with my friends. She loved the idea and said peacocking was now her favorite word.

We leave the hotel and meet up with Mystery and a bunch of guys from the Montreal Lair at Doc’s sweet crib. Then Mystery, No9, and I go to a private room and leave Mafia***** talking to some of the PUAs. I tell the boys about the night before and tell them that I want them to help me out as backup just in case things get out of hand at the party with her ex-boyfriend. They said they’d roll with me.

Mafia*****, Mystery, and I decide to go shopping with Mafia*****, and she bought some funky clothes. I didn’t really like the shopping very much, but she sure looked hot. Mystery helped her pick out clothes to make her look all hot. He told me that he gives her a 9+. Then we buy a bottle of champagne to bring to the party and decided to walk towards her ex-boyfriends’s house. We get in there and her Asian ex-BF opens the door.

At the party, I isolate Mafia***** for awhile on the balcony, but eventually I befriend all the friends of the ex-boyfriend. One of them knocks over the bottle of champagne by accident and apologizes and brings us a new bottle. Mystery does some magic in front of the ex-boyfriend and Mafia***** and the dude says that he is the guy who talked to him on the phone and that we wanted to talk to him about workshops (cuz I mentioned them).

He backs off and I talk to Mystery for a bit, who wanted to ask permission to sarge Mafia***** cuz she is so hot. I said, “not this time, bro” so he said “ok”. Then, Mafia*****, Mystery, Mafia*****, and I decided to jet and meet up with Doc and his HB10 GF for dinner. After dinner, Mafia***** and I went to Old Montreal and walked around and chatted.

While in isolation with Mafia*****, I told her that I wanted her to travel with me and be my international pivot and pickup chicks together while traveling around the world and around Europe. She’s very social, hot, and likes other girls so I thought it’d be great for threesomes. I do a lot of variations of TD’s BF destroyer to destroy all the objections she’d bring up.

Mafia*****: That’d be soo cool, but you know, I am soo happy in Quebec City.
Papa: Yeah. I guest it’s cool, it’s nice to be in Quebec. You have a nice…SIMPLY…quiet…lifestyle…it’s satisfying…it’s simply comfortable…STABLE…predictable…you know, when you want to have a good time, you can go party in the corn fields…but it’s nice and cool.
Mafia*****: You don’t know what you are asking of me. I have a boyfriend there.
Papa: You should break up with him and roll with me, babe.
Mafia*****: You can’t understand what we have together.
Papa: He sounds like a nice guy.
Mafia*****: Yeah. We have problems. I don’t like how he treats me sometimes, but he’s not the guy I’m going to marry. We have amazing times together.
Papa: Well, he sounds like a nice guy. He probably just seems like he’s not that kind of guy that you could settle with, but he’s probably a pretty predictable, stable, and nice guy that will buy you dinner, buy you flowers, and take care of you.
Mafia*****: No. He never buys me anything, but he is amazing. He’s the ****!
Papa: Once you get to know anybody, he is a nice guy. He probably just acts that way because some people are energy leeches and although they give you good times, you don’t want to hang out with people that bring you down. That’s not cool. But he sounds like a nice guy.
Mafia*****: Yes! That’s it. I don’t like energy leeches. It’s just that he’s all I got in Quebec City.
Papa: Yeah. Well, if you roll with me…you can help me with my workshops. Quit your job and join me on mine [I told her everything about the community and workshops].
Mafia*****: I need to think about this.
Papa: Yeah. Well, you have a nice lifestyle and job. It’s stable…or you could roll with me on a spontaneous adventure. But it’s the spontaneous things in life that truly makes life exciting. I just need to know that I’m with a girl that wants to be with me in every way.

We decide to leave Old Montreal and go back to our hotel. I wanted to go chill in the Jacuzzi, but it was closed. So we head back to the hotel and I want to watch a movie and have sex in our hotel, but she wants to go out with her friends because her ex-boyfriend is DJing. I don’t want to spend anymore time with her ex-boyfriends. She then makes a call tells me that he ex2 is downstairs and she wants to have coffee with him cuz he haves a gift for her. I don’t like the idea at all and tell her to stay. She says NO and that she’ll be gone for only 30 minutes. However, I fall asleep and when I wake up, she was still gone. I call Mystery and meet up with Mystery, Kojak, and No9 and tell them what happened. They think that she may be scamming me cuz I lent her some money to buy some clothes and she said she’d pay me back in the morning, and she still had the hotel key. They believe that she’ll go to the hotel while I’m not there and may steal my stuff. I don’t believe them, but we decide that I should checkout either way and move to Kojak’s.

So we go to the hotel and I put my key in my hotel room door and it doesn’t work. WTF?!? I’m not too concerned though and when I go downstairs, the front desk told me that they change the hotel room key everyday. So I check out, grab all my stuff (and hers) and go to Kojak’s house. The only problem is that I have no way of getting a hold of Mafia***** and she can’t get a hold of me.

Well, I have a conference call with the SF and NYC Lairs so I call Cliff (from Cliff’s List) and invite him to join the conference and ask if I can crash at his crib cuz he has a super-sweet pad. He says sure. So I grab all my stuff and Mafia*****’s and catch a cab towards Cliff. Suddenly, I have an idea! I tell the cab to make a detour to Mafia*****’s ex-BF to find out if she might be with him.

 

[Pap]

As soon as I roll up to the house, I see the ex-BF. I say, “Dude, where is Mafia*****?!?” He doesn’t answer and just gives me a strange look. Suddenly, I hear a voice yelling, “PAPA!!!” and Mafia***** jumps into my arms. I hold onto her and throw her into the taxi. Then we drive to Cliff’s house. We get there and I introduce Cliff to Mafia*****. I show her around the pad and joke about how it really is my crib.

I tell Cliff to call NYC/SF to get us on the conference call while I throw Mafia***** into one of the bedrooms, rip off her clothes, and leave her naked on the bed, saying, “Babe, I’ll be right back.” She tries to stop me, but I leave the room and get on the conference call with Cliff. I hear Mafia***** in the other room, but I want to at least get a few minutes on the phone cuz I promised the boys.

Papa: Hello. TD can’t join us cuz he’s ****in some girl right now, and I’ve only got a few minutes cuz I have a girl here too.
THE NYC LIST: Hey.
Cliff: Hey guys.
Marco: Let’s get into Q&A. Anyone want to start off…
NYCDUDE: I have a question…do you leave messages when you call girls.
Cliff: [explanation of how MTL will call a girl and say something like, “Hey Girl, the most interesting thing happened to me…I was walking down the street and [click, hang up the phone]. It is a great tactic cuz the girl will call back and say that the message got cut off and that she wanted to know what happened.
Papa: [I agreed with the message tactic and said that I usually don’t leave message] Guys, I really gotta go soon. [noises of girl in background and me thinking that I’d rather be having sex with a hottie than answering basic questions about the Game] There’s a naked girl yelling at me in French in the background and I’ve really got to run.
Cliff: [she enters the room] And here she is.
Papa: Uh oh.

I grab Mafia***** and take off my clothes and start making-out with her and sucking her tits and she gets says that she is upset. I continue making out with her and say, “Yeah. I really shouldn’t kiss you here [while kissing her nipples] or here [while going lower]…that’d be bad…just plain wrong…she’s laughing. I continue this process for about 15 minutes with backturns and rollbacks when she starts *****ing again.

Eventually, I use Jlaix’s line, “I wanna lick it…I wanna spell the alphabet.”

And then, I sing the Alphabet while licking her ***** as if spelling out the alphabet.

Mafia*****: Ooooo. You don’t know how good this feels!!!

Then, we have sex again.

I wake up. She goes immediately to the bank to pay me back for the money I lent her to buy clothes and apologizes for not coming back. She ended up chilling and smoking with her friends all night.

Papa: I was worried that I’d never see you again and that’d I’d have all your stuff cuz I didn’t have any way to get a hold of you. It was such an amazing coincidence to have found you while driving by in a taxi. It’s amazing. Even just meeting you randomly by a club the first night we met. It’s like we’re getting just swept away…like it’s just meant to happen by all odds.
Mafia*****: Yeah. It’s sooo weird. It’s too much for me. Are you spying on me? I won’t care if you are.
Papa: Hahaha. No. Of course not, kid. You are so silly.

Then, we ended up having lunch and chilling at the Jazz Festival with Cliff. Some random guys tried to pick her up while I got a phone call by saying, “Hey, you are so beautiful.” It was so pathetic. She told me about what he said and I simpy replied, “Hmmm. Nice of him.” We had a pretty good time, and she had to return to Quebec City for work so I brought her to the bus station and kissed her goodbye.

 

[Pap]

PAPA’S QUEBEC ADVENTURES WITH MAFIA*****

Episode 3: (Do You Love Me, Mafia*****?!?)

After returning to Montreal, I took a midnight bus to meet up with Mafia*****. The unfortunate thing was that she didn’t know what time I was arriving and my cell phone wasn’t working in the area. So I walked up and down the bus asking to borrow a mobile phone to call my girlfriend until I found a random guy who said I could. However, when I called, she didn’t pick up the phone.

Papa: Dude, she didn’t pickup the phone.
Dude: Bummer.
Papa: Can I call again in a few minutes.
Dude: Sure. Whatever.
Papa: Thanks, bro. You know, I am going to Quebec City and I am supposed to meet this girl and I can’t get a hold of her and it’d really suck if I don’t cuz I have no place to stay and don’t speak French.
Dude: That sucks, man. You know, I just came from Montreal and a similar thing happened. I met some stripper chick. Hot stuff! And she wanted me to visit her. Well, when I got there, she never answered my calls. Now, I’m going home and never met up with her.
Papa: ****! That sucks, my man. Anyways, this is her number. I hope she doesn’t do the same with me.
Dude: WTF?!? I recognize that number!!!
Papa: What?!?
Dude: Yeah. I think so. Wait, does she have red hair?
Papa: No. She is a brunette, but she did dye her hair.
Dude: Oh ****, dude. I hope it’s not the same girl.
Papa: Why?
Dude: Cuz the chick I’m thinking of is a crazy ***** from hell. I hope it’s not the same girl because that’s what all my friends called her because she is straight nuts. She likes Asian guys too and used to date [some hot shot rapper dude].
Papa: Well, my man. Here’s a video of her. [showing her a video in the Camera].
Dude: That’s her!!!

We spend the next few minutes talking about her. There are very few Quebec City people that speak English fluently supposedly so they all hangout and know each other. I end up calling Mafia***** and put him on the phone. They get into a fight and Mafia***** says not to trust the guy because he is scum. I told her when I was getting into town and that we should meet up at a hotel.

When I arrive, she is nowhere to be found and she didn’t answer her phone. I end up getting a hotel room and crash. When I wake up around 9am…I call her again…and again…and again…persistence counts. The only thing is that she lives with her BF so he picks up the phone, says HELLO and then hangs up on me saying that Mafia***** is not there. I call again cuz I heard her in the background and convince Mafia***** to come.

She arrives in a cab and we have breakfast together in my hotel and talk about Europe and how she plans to leave her job, but she is afraid of leaving town and her BF cuz he was so mad. We take off our clothes and fool around and take pics. Pretty fun! However, after awhile, she starts to freak out and says she wants to call her BF, who was freaking out and sad. I told her DO NOT CALL.

She starts to cry and I could tell she still has feelings for him. She ends up talking to him against my will and I get pissed. They talk for close to an hour on the phone and she says she feels better now because he told her it was OK to travel around with me. I was kinda pissed at this point cuz I wanted her to not call him and to just ditch him and break up with him completely.

Papa: I can’t do this.
Mafia*****: Why? Cuz we fought and I called him. Fights are healthy.
Papa: No. It’s cuz I want you. And I want to be with you completely. And I’m not sure if you are.
Mafia*****: It’s just that I’m afraid that I might travel around with you and I might miss my BF, but if I travel with you then maybe things will change.
Papa: If that’s the way it is, then there’s no love and I can’t have you travel with me. This is the best way. [Mafia***** looks sad] We have so much with each other and you have so much going for you and I have a return ticket to come back here so I know I will be back, but this is the only way that I WILL KNOW for sure that you truly want to be with me [and not just for traveling the world].

Mafia***** and I had a heart to heart talk and made out with each other and she tries to cheer me up cuz I will miss her, and she still wants to be with me so she feeds me food and tries to put me into state by grinding the **** out of me. However, I check out of the hotel and drive her to her job. On the way there, I tell him, “I will MISS YOU sooooo much. It’s just that there’s no love. And I feel for you.”

Mafia*****: I love you.

I give her a hug and kiss…give her a half smile…and walk away.

…3 months later…

I am back in Montreal, and I get 6 phone calls for me on Cliff’s mobile phone for me from Mafia*****, she wants to see me, and for me to visit her. I decide that there’s no time cuz I didn’t have much time. So I flew home to LA and she calls me on my phone there saying she wants to visit me. I’m thinking of seeing her again soon….I called her and haven’t spoken to her about plans yet. The Papa/Mafia***** adventure will continue.


Cheers,

Papa

http://galileo.spaceports.com/~papa/
http://www.realsocialdynamics.com
http://www.mysterymethod.com/papa.rox

 

[CLOONEY]

man, this is WAAAAYYYYY too long. I am sure you could have missed some of the "not so important" parts.

I skimmed through it and all I can say is good luck with this girl. I wish you the bets. However she seems very confused, this will only make the situation harder for both of you.

 

[Pap]

She may be confused, but it's all good...cuz I'm getting laid. Yea!

Cheers,

Papa

 

[Pap]

PS:

Mafia***** contacted me today from Quebec and is going to be visiting Los Angeles so that she can see me...look forward to the FR/LR...she's a wild one, and it's great cuz it's exciting for me and makes my field reports more adventurous...ha!

 

[Pap]

PPS:

The ***** after Mafia is Beyaatch...she loves it when I call her it.