"Love" a human made construct? Does it even exist?

[Toast123]

Is love, when it all comes down to it...simply scientific?

Could there technically be a sciencetific formula for love?

If we never truly know EVERYTHING about someone, then we never truly know someone....how can you love someone if you don't know them....do you only "love" what you PERCIEVE someone to be?

 

[Eternal_water]

Interesting question.

Even If it does exist I bet at least half of people who say "I love you" don't actually love the person.

 

[MisterD]

I do. I believe it exists.

I've never been in love but I believe it exists.

Not sure what kind. If it's like the movies where you meet someone and you just *know*. Or if it grows over time.

I'm also not sure if it involves finding your perfect match physically, mentally, and emotionally; or if it involves forgiving someone of their flaws, looking past their faults, and accepting them.

I know I won't settle down with one girl until I feel like i've really found something.

My longest exclusive relationship ever was but a few weeks.

I just feel like you'll know when it's time to settle down. Right now I want to have fun

 

[bigneil]

It exists, but it's not forever. It comes and goes like a warm breeze. It's not something you can rely on to be there. You present her a million variables and she either likes the composition or not, and it unfolds over time. It's also based on your being her best option over the long run, and her being your best option over the long run.

I found that for women "love" (which I define as her highest interest where she is 100% punctual, 100% willing, 100% responsive to your romantic gestures, and is texting sexy photos of herself) - normally the honeymoon phase - it's directly related to making her orgasm. You cast a spell on her that lasts about 20-30 days. You must repeat in that time, but often it's "been there, done that" and you lose sight of that key maintenance aspect and start to take her for granted by the 4th, 5th month. Then someone else makes her "love" him and it's over.

For me however, love is a rare, emergent phenomenon related to Enlightenment, Nirvana, God, etc. that can be triggered by "making love", meditation, and psychotropic drugs such as Psilocybin.

 

[Falcon]

As a human being, you create meaning throughout life. It's a good thing. No one wants to live a life with no meaning.

Love in that sense is very meaningful. It doesn't matter if it really exists in the physical world or not. If it exists in your head, that is good enough and it is doing its job.

 

[zekko]

Just because there is a scientific explanation for love, doesn't mean it doesn't exist. There's a scientific explanation for light bulbs too, but they're real.

 

[Serg897]

These days, Im beggining to think its a man-made, subjective human construct more than anything else.

 

[bigneil]

Love is one of the high points along the sinusoidal curve of reality. It implies low points, both preceding and following.

The other option is to stagnate at the average line. I'll take the former, along with the battle scars and great memories.

"You're losin' all the highs and lows
ain't it funny how the feeling goes away?"

-Eagles

 

[Eternal_water]

I agree with the remote,

family love, love for a pet dog etc. exists

But Romantic love? I seriouly doubt it, and bigneils comment makes me doubt it even more.

 

[bigneil]

...but I was paraphrasing remote:

"Romantic love...is generally... like heroin... (highs) also heart breaks come from romantic love when it goes south... (lows)."

 

[Eternal_water]

Sorry I was referring to your earlier comment of it existing as long as you are the best long term option and it fading after a few months

 

[SoldMySoul]

What is that stupid adage about better to have loved and lost than to never love at all??? A bunch of horse $hit I tell ya!!! I do think love is real, but with too many variables...

The older I get and the more garbage I have seen and dealt with, it is making this thing we call LOVE a lot harder. You can think you love someone, but do they really LOVE you in return??????? Once you can answer that honestly, then you have answered the Op's original question.

 

[st_99]

well first you need to define 'love' in some specific way to ask if its real or not, and imo i don't there is any definitive meaningful definition.

So with that said, i think the question becomes totally irrelevant. Basically you just do the best you can when you're in a relationship and whatever happens happens. Whether or not it was 'true love' is basically meaningless.

It doesn't change what you had, or continue to have with the other person. How you feel about her or memories that you hold or things like that. It doesn't matter what you call it. Girls and Guys getting together for brief or very long or forever time is just something we do. Call it what you want.

 

[Bossman90]

You should watch the science of sex appeal. Supposedly scientist believe that love is an emotional response that is derived from chemicals that your body produces during sex.

 

[Krueg]

I think their is two types of love.

1. People who just react based on emotions and "think" their in love but, really arent.

2. Then you got love for your family; parents, grandparents, aunts, cousions, sister and eventually future spouse. (Who live together til' death do you part.)

 

[BatJuan]

well first you need to define 'love' in some specific way to ask if its real or not, and imo i don't there is any definitive meaningful definition.

So with that said, i think the question becomes totally irrelevant. Basically you just do the best you can when you're in a relationship and whatever happens happens. Whether or not it was 'true love' is basically meaningless.

It doesn't change what you had, or continue to have with the other person. How you feel about her or memories that you hold or things like that. It doesn't matter what you call it. Girls and Guys getting together for brief or very long or forever time is just something we do. Call it what you want.

This. I love my family, not because they are superior to others, but because they were the ones who raised me and have been there for me since the beginning. It's not like I picked them over the billions of other families out there.

People who get married just happen to get along well with each other (ideally), and from that bond they develop feelings that we call "love." It's not that those feelings are exclusive, but rather just a result of the time spent together/attraction.

Not even sure what "romantic love" means, other than it being the love between two partners. If it's merely the attraction post-sex, then I wouldn't call it love at all, as I've never had sex with my family, yet I still love them.

 

[HariPoter13]

Good question.

Everything has a scientific answer but thats not really important.
What you need to ask is "is romantic love real"
Because you may love your family..with not conditions. Now this is what I call "real love"

romantic love however..is generally made up bv775h17 and something that causes a lot of harm...romantic love is all about one person blowing up the other persons ego and vice versa...and filling gaps in each others insecurities "i love you"..."do you love me too?"...etc...This is unhealthy and immature...and its also highly addictive...

The addiction part is very dangerous...because its like heroin...you will bend over backwards for the worst person because you fear loosing their "love".
You dont do this for your own blood though...and this is the big difference...
And that tells you right there romantic love..is not real..in the sense that it isnt pure...it is absolutely based on conditions.

Arranged marriages have a far higher success rate than ones based on romantic love...because an arranged marriage is more like a logical business contract...no ego involved and no addiction.
Not saying arranged marriage is the way to go..just pointing out why they work more than western ones.

Also heart breaks come from romantic love when it goes south...this also is very bad...people lose the plot, have breakdowns...kill themselves and even murder ex partners due to this. Its basically like a heroin addict who is forced into cold turkey...this is what someone who gets dumped feels like...and they cant get their fix back..it fvcks them up.

So thats my take on love. It supposedly works out for some folks though...supposedly..but in my experience of knowing marriages that last a long time..the couples always tread very carefully around each other as not to upset the apple cart...this is hardly what id call happily ever after.
My view is, if your gonna have a long term relationship...be mature...and treat a woman like family...thats why people used to get married...it made them family and turned the romantic love in to the real stuff.
these days marriage aint worth the paper its written on...women seem to get married for all the wrong reasons, like a big over the top wedding...and men...are generally complete suckers..happy just to get any woman who would take them. And people wonder why marriages fail hahahaaaaaa.

Quite true. "Love" exists only for a brief period of time, like 6 months - 2 years. Just enough to impregnate the woman. Evolution is a heartless bitch. Btw, "love" is actually sex.

 

[Packers2010]

firstly you have to define love.

I thought I was in love one. Just turned out I loved being in her company. is that what love is? I can't say.

all I can say is it took me 8 years to figure it out.

 

[nismo-4]

AFAIC, Love is a four letter word, and sometimes spelled cash.

Case dismissed.

 

[zekko]

Of course love exists. But be aware it may not last.
Yeesh, some of you guys are so cynical, no wonder nobody gets laid around here.