Lost the girl…again

[captain55]

So a girl I have been going out with for a month now broke things off with me tonight, she told me she doesn't feel the same way she did about me anymore.


- I wait too long between texts
- I don't care (about her in general because I never text her etc)
- I was too aggressive sexually and she doesn't want that (even though we never had sex we just fooled around)
- we are at different places in life because Im on my own and independent and she lives with her parents

Just curious how could a girl lose physical attraction so quickly? This girl was making out with me like crazy for four dates in a row. No alcohol involved, hitting me up like crazy. ... And then she just lost feelings overnight…she said she talked to her girlfriends about me and they all said to her that "he doesn't care". The truth is I really liked this chick and wanted a relationship with her…I did everything textbook perfect DJ. Im being honest fellas this girl was amazing. I've hooked up with badder b i t c h e s but relationship wise, I don't think Ill ever do better…

 

[Igetit!]

So a girl I have been going out with for a month now broke things off with me tonight, she told me she doesn't feel the same way she did about me anymore.


- I wait too long between texts
- I don't care (about her in general because I never text her etc)
- I was too aggressive sexually and she doesn't want that (even though we never had sex we just fooled around)
- we are at different places in life because Im on my own and independent and she lives with her parents

Just curious how could a girl lose physical attraction so quickly? This girl was making out with me like crazy for four dates in a row. No alcohol involved, hitting me up like crazy. ... And then she just lost feelings overnight…she said she talked to her girlfriends about me and they all said to her that "he doesn't care". The truth is I really liked this chick and wanted a relationship with her…I did everything textbook perfect DJ. Im being honest fellas this girl was amazing. I've hooked up with badder b i t c h e s but relationship wise, I don't think Ill ever do better…

I got ONE QUESTION for you. Well,maybe two. First of all....


Is this the SAME GIRL you made your last thread about? The one where you said you were going to "BREAK ALL THE DJ RULES"........this here......http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=228360 ?

And next,did you go through with your plan to break all the rules?

What did you do?

 

[Lozboss]

You've been going out a month and NOT had sex.

Why would you want to be with her? NEXT her and move on.

Dating is a numbers game- you have to screen loads of women to find the right ones (notice Plural rather than ONE).

You want a girl who matches you- sexually and personality wise.

Chalk this one up as experience and move on. Get out of your Oneitis mindset (never find another better- please!)

 

[captain55]

I got ONE QUESTION for you. Well,maybe two. First of all....


Is this the SAME GIRL you made your last thread about? The one where you said you were going to "BREAK ALL THE DJ RULES"........this here......http://www.sosuave.net/forum/showthread.php?t=228360 ?

And next,did you go through with your plan to break all the rules?

What did you do?

Yep same girl. I actually didn't tell her how I felt about her though until after she told me she didn't want to continue things. To be honest I think I would have gotten further with her if I would of. Next girl I like Im gonna blow up her phone 24/7 and text her whenever I feel like. Apparently women don't like a busy successful man….I got more ***** when I was unemployed and had time to sit around and snap chat chicks all the time and take off anytime I wanted to hang out with them.

 

[captain55]

You've been going out a month and NOT had sex.

Why would you want to be with her? NEXT her and move on.

Dating is a numbers game- you have to screen loads of women to find the right ones (notice Plural rather than ONE).

You want a girl who matches you- sexually and personality wise.

Chalk this one up as experience and move on. Get out of your Oneitis mindset (never find another better- please!)

Because I am a realist…and she was probably the best all around girl I've ever had interested in me for any given length of time in over two years. 8.5 looks, lives with her parents, college educated, great dancer..and didn't **** me on the first three dates. I don't see how I will do better.

 

[Alpheta]

Same shiz happened to me.

I started acting distant 'busy' and stopped replying or initiating texts as much. I even flaked a date to seem busy lol.

What happened? She broke up because she thought i didnt care anymore.

Dont take everything on here as divine. Every woman is different.

 

[pyros]

So a girl I have been going out with for a month now broke things off with me tonight, she told me she doesn't feel the same way she did about me anymore.


- I wait too long between texts
- I don't care (about her in general because I never text her etc)
- I was too aggressive sexually and she doesn't want that (even though we never had sex we just fooled around)
- we are at different places in life because Im on my own and independent and she lives with her parents

Just curious how could a girl lose physical attraction so quickly? This girl was making out with me like crazy for four dates in a row. No alcohol involved, hitting me up like crazy. ... And then she just lost feelings overnight…she said she talked to her girlfriends about me and they all said to her that "he doesn't care". The truth is I really liked this chick and wanted a relationship with her…I did everything textbook perfect DJ. Im being honest fellas this girl was amazing. I've hooked up with badder b i t c h e s but relationship wise, I don't think Ill ever do better…

I dont know where you read that you must never text a girl...wtf?

You can wait to reply to her texts to seem busy but you dont have to wait for hours just because, and you dont have to do it with every damn text.

You must escalate sexually, you must not look like a creep trying desperatly to have sex with her.


Now you say that with the next girl you will flood her with texts...WTF??

YOUR PROBLEM IS THAT YOU TAKE EVERYTHING YOU READ TO EXTREMES. Everything you read are tips, or things you should do more often than not, but THEY ARE NOT RULES YOU HAVE TO FOLLOW 100% OF THE TIME.

Jeez.

 

[Igetit!]

So a girl I have been going out with for a month now broke things off with me tonight, she told me she doesn't feel the same way she did about me anymore.


- I wait too long between texts
- I don't care (about her in general because I never text her etc)
- I was too aggressive sexually and she doesn't want that (even though we never had sex we just fooled around)
- we are at different places in life because Im on my own and independent and she lives with her parents

Same shiz happened to me.

I started acting distant 'busy' and stopped replying or initiating texts as much. I even flaked a date to seem busy lol.

What happened? She broke up because she thought i didnt care anymore.

You guys are taking the rules here TOO SERIOUSLY.....you're following them too rigidly. You're swinging too far in the opposite direction.

You're trying to prevent one problem,but are inadvertantly causing another.


Let's say you start dating a girl. She calls you,text you,suggest dates,and shows up for them. Then lets say after 4 or 5 weeks,the calls dry up,she takes half a day (or longer) to reply to a simple "What you up to" text,and she rarely initiates dates or spending time together,and/or makes up excuses when you try to set up a date.

If a girl did all that,what would YOU think? Would you think her interest level is high? That she cares about you?

Alpheta,you said in relation to your girl,that you.......

Started acting distant
Stopped replying to her texts
Stopped initiating texts
And starting flaking on dates

You started acting distant,wouldn't text her,wouldn't return her texts,and wouldn't show up for dates that you two planned.


All that,and you're "shocked" that she left you cause she thought you didn't care???? What was she supposed to think?


I get what you're trying to do.....but you're going overboard. You're doing all that cause you don't want to appear needy or clingy cause you know it's a turnoff to chicks. You're trying to appear like you have busy lives cause women like that.......but you're going too far.


All you're doing is trading one problem for another. Yeah...you avoided looking needy or like you don't have a life,but now the chick thinks you don't give a d@mn about her. Why wouldn't she think that?


If a chick who was into you suddenly started acting distant,stopped initiating texts,stopped returning your texts,and started flaking on dates,what would you think? That she REALLY LIKES and is REALLY into you???

Huh?

You guys are starting that NONSENSE TOO SOON off into the relationship. You can't pull that 4 weeks into dating someone.

Let me put it this way........if you two haven't had the "exclusivity" talk yet,it's too soon to try that foolishness.

 

[Fitters]

She lost you

 

[Lozboss]

If you don't want to listen to advice then stop posting on here.

None of the DJs here want to waste their time on a blue pill if you aren't willing to listen to advice and act on it.

Captain and Alpheta- you are lost. Swallow the red pill and open your minds.

At the moment your mindset means there is no hope for you.

You both have scarcity mind sets and are clearly still ingrained in the feminine imperative

 

[ucde]

Sounds like you over-DJed it bro. Congratulations.

Now you know not to take the jokers on here too seriously.

Honestly, call her back and explain to her that you were following rules from an internet forum which led you to try to be distant and jerk-like. Show her the forum. Tell her how you messed up. Tell her how you took advice from a bunch of angry virgins and wanna-be players.

That's the kind of real sh1t you have to do to get a real woman. But then again, maybe I read the situation wrong, no guarantees.

 

[Skyline]

Sounds to me like you don't know your style yet. You seem to be all over the place with "breaking DJ rules" and then all of sudden she crashes on you anyway. The "she talked to her girls about me and they said that he didn't care" means that you were not communicating with her.

By I mean communicate, I mean you were just physical. You have to keep her talking and share stuff you have in common, fake it if you have to. You have the physical aspect down but not the emotional. I don't think you even slept with her so some people might say you really didn't have anything.


You also don't have to wait a year to reply just reply as soon as you aren't busy and if you're not busy, just do 2-4 minutes.

It's not a bad thing to reach out to her every now and then as well, for dates or course.

 

[Bingo-Player]

Youre in the wrong mindset

Your worrying WHY she isn’t interested in you when in reality she needs to be the one worrying about WHY you aint interested in her !

Once you understand that concept then you will be away to go with women

Always remember that if you give a woman an inch she will take a mile , this chick has taken several miles certaintly at your expense

 

[captain55]

Youre in the wrong mindset

Your worrying WHY she isn’t interested in you when in reality she needs to be the one worrying about WHY you aint interested in her !

Once you understand that concept then you will be away to go with women

Always remember that if you give a woman an inch she will take a mile , this chick has taken several miles certaintly at your expense

I had her chasing me the entire time until I got in bed with her, thought it was mission accomplished. What guy wouldn't take "I want you go to come over to my moms house and go night swimming with me" as an invitation to her panties? Maybe I just didn't get her wet enough who knows

 

[Alexandar]

You guys are taking the rules here TOO SERIOUSLY.....you're following them too rigidly. You're swinging too far in the opposite direction.

You're trying to prevent one problem,but are inadvertantly causing another.


Let's say you start dating a girl. She calls you,text you,suggest dates,and shows up for them. Then lets say after 4 or 5 weeks,the calls dry up,she takes half a day (or longer) to reply to a simple "What you up to" text,and she rarely initiates dates or spending time together,and/or makes up excuses when you try to set up a date.

If a girl did all that,what would YOU think? Would you think her interest level is high? That she cares about you?

Alpheta,you said in relation to your girl,that you.......

Started acting distant
Stopped replying to her texts
Stopped initiating texts
And starting flaking on dates

You started acting distant,wouldn't text her,wouldn't return her texts,and wouldn't show up for dates that you two planned.


All that,and you're "shocked" that she left you cause she thought you didn't care???? What was she supposed to think?


I get what you're trying to do.....but you're going overboard. You're doing all that cause you don't want to appear needy or clingy cause you know it's a turnoff to chicks. You're trying to appear like you have busy lives cause women like that.......but you're going too far.


All you're doing is trading one problem for another. Yeah...you avoided looking needy or like you don't have a life,but now the chick thinks you don't give a d@mn about her. Why wouldn't she think that?


If a chick who was into you suddenly started acting distant,stopped initiating texts,stopped returning your texts,and started flaking on dates,what would you think? That she REALLY LIKES and is REALLY into you???

Huh?

You guys are starting that NONSENSE TOO SOON off into the relationship. You can't pull that 4 weeks into dating someone.

Let me put it this way........if you two haven't had the "exclusivity" talk yet,it's too soon to try that foolishness.

this. absolutely spot on.

how immature and braindead do. you have to be to not see that anyways? its common sense. i guess i never grasped before how innately anti social most people here actually are.

like, just be NORMAL. ffs. obviously you can wait a bit before answering a text. but if she replies instantly after, you start to look like a phucking idiot if you keep delaying without mentioning that youre busy or something. if its obvious youre both there and able to chat a bit, just chat normal. or better yet phone her.

Sounds like you over-DJed it bro. Congratulations.

Now you know not to take the jokers on here too seriously.

Honestly, call her back and explain to her that you were following rules from an internet forum which led you to try to be distant and jerk-like. Show her the forum. Tell her how you messed up. Tell her how you took advice from a bunch of angry virgins and wanna-be players.

That's the kind of real sh1t you have to do to get a real woman. But then again, maybe I read the situation wrong, no guarantees.

you are an idiot. read the above. and i dont even know why youre in these forums, thats an absolutely honest question. you clearly realize subconsciously that you are at least a little bit confused. in reality, its a ridiculously huge amount of confusion. by reading the first quote above, and by seizing to think like such an idiot (no offense...) you can actually understand something.