"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

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Lost my path, need a way

lightofhatred

Don Juan
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Hello Dj's

Well after being a borderline hunter (which I still am, if they pop up), and then over the course of not talking to girls/being anti social for about a year and dedicating my life to professional gaming, i'm not sure where to start up again?

I seem to have lost my "spark" in conversations, what do you recommend I do/read?

Thank you :)
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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macagent

Don Juan
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DJ Bible just doesn't load for me anymore :(
 

Chamber36

Master Don Juan
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Buddha_Mind

Master Don Juan
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not here. in the real world.
I know from my own life I've gone through phases of extroversion and introversion; probably different aspects of yourself develop in these different periods, although sometimes it can appear we are moving backwards.

Sounds like you're ready to move back outward again -- I would say if anything practice engaging conversation -- reach out to all of those people around you (clerks, people next to you on a bus, etc, etc) and generally practice starting conversation, or directing the course of conversation (being aware of the transitioning of subjects or branching something they've shared onto the next subject in some guided fashion). I myself, having truly struggled with social anxiety in my life at younger ages, have found conversation is really a skill (even beyond just the DJ notion), I've found the best results with just exposure and practice.
 

"How I Made Sure No Woman Ever Friend-Zoned Me Again"

She calls you when her car breaks down. When she needs help moving. When some guy she's actually dating treats her badly.

You're the listener. The reliable one. The guy who would treat her so much better, if she'd just open her eyes.

She won't. You trained her to see you as the low-effort option — the friend who requires zero risk and zero investment. Every favor dug the hole deeper.

The "22 Rules" break the pattern. You'll stop auditioning for a role she already cast and become the man she chases instead. It starts with Rule 1.

Read more...

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