Lost my Confidence after breakup

[Social_disturbance]

I was recently broken up with a girl which I semi-lived with, and am having trouble getting back to normal. This is my second day, but basically I feel depressed, can't sleep as well, lost most of my appetite, and feel kind of ill. Any advice on how to get better from those who have experienced similar things would be appreciated.

 

[L B]

Things I have done in the past after a major breakup:

Take some time to yourself and reflect on what happened and learn from it. Improve and never make the same mistake again.

If you have a close friend or family you can trust, hang out with them for a couple of days to let time pass.

Focus on something else for a while before jumping into any other relationship. Once you have regain your focus and self, go out and have fun. I usually take about a month break from dating to gather myself. When you are that close to someone (long term relationship), you can't just forget about it or move on just like that. It takes time, but make sure that time is productive. Don't do anything destructive. Try to focus your energy on improving yourself.

 

[feelingloved]

This may sound simple but...
Figure out which other areas of your life are sources of low confidence, and work to improve them. Aim to make yourself outstanding in the areas of your strength.
Do nothing much else, and force yourself to get tons of sleep, day after day.
Its been my approach.

 

[MooseGod]

You must find your center, young grasshopper. Suggestions:

Do something that promotes in you a stronger sense of self...go hiking in the mountains for a few days or something by yourself. Buy a motorcycle and ride it cross-country.

Exercise. Gets the endorphins going, plus the obvious positive change in physique after sticking with it for a while.

Get a dog. A dog forces you to wake up at a decent hour (to feed them), you have to walk them when you might otherwise sit on your ass all day. Then you've got the added benefit of easily picking up chicks (the good ones are usually animal lovers.)

Grow a beard. Do this while you're hiking in the mountains or riding motorcycles cross-country. Don't ask why, and don't argue with me on this one. Chuck Norris has a beard, you think he's got low confidence? :crackup:

...and feelingloved suggested getting lots of sleep, but anything over 8 to 8 1/2 hours will affect you negatively--too much sleep is almost as bad as too little. Plus sleeping a lot is a pretty common symptom of depression.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

Do an autopsy of the relationship and come to grips with both the good and the bad of the relationship. Figure out what you've learned from the experience and make any adjustments if necessary. Go out and focus on yourself for a while before looking for a replacement. Just enjoy the act of being single before thinking about becoming committed again.