Looks: Matter revealed.

[Oxide]

God, this has got to be the second most popular topic after "how long can you go without playing with yourself?"

Let's put the old lady to rest.



To all of those guys who say looks dont matter if you have the attitude/confidence, im sorry to pee in your cheereos but they do matter.

To all of those guys who say looks matter and you dont need an attitude..you arent completely correct either.



If you are going to a club, and you are ugly as sin, please dont expect to dance with all the hotties. No matter what kind of attitude you have, everyone is attracted to pretty people, that is just how things are. You can pray to the "Iranian from hell" fable all you wish, and that isnt gonna make you any prettier, but there is hope.

One thing i notice that affects how a person views your looks/personality and EVENTUALLY is attracted/ or repelled by you is the amount of TIME the person interacts with you.

When the girl first sees you, she has no idea what you are like, so the only thing she can rely on is your looks. She didnt spend any time getting to know you, so she cant judge you on anything else. This is exactly why clubs and ugly people dont mix.

On the other hand, when you are interacting with a person for a period of time, her or his personality is revealed, so you can now judge on two factors. This goes positive/negative ways.

I bet all of this happened to every single guy here. He sees a hot girl, thinks he wants her. When she shows her personality, however, she acts like a total b1tch/baby. Suddenly, she isnt as good looking as you thought she was when you first saw her.

Or you meet an average looking girl, think nothing of her, but when you get to know her, you realize both of you love similar things, and get along great. Suddenly you notice you are more attracted to her.

Over a longer period of time, people start basing the attraction more on personality than looks. At first however, it is the total opposite and looks do matter much more.

-Ox

 

[coh]

75% Looks. 25% Personality. IMO. Which sucks.


Doesn't this belong in TIPS btw?

 

[MindOverMatter]

Like you said in your first two lines, this has been talked to death. Looks get your foot in the door, your personality makes her open it, but if you're really really ridiculously good looking, there is no door.

 

[Le Parisien]

I totally agree with you Oxide.

Talking about CLUBS & UGLY/GOOD LOOKING people, I will share my little story tonight.

So I just got back from my favorite local club, I was there with a female friend, she brought with her two coworkers, a girl and a guy, and also a female friend of the girl.
The guy was short, goofy looking, not really fat, but definitely not athletic at all. And he has little fashion sens and he looks very weak/insecure when he talks. The girl coworker on the other ahnd is a very decent cutie. And she's definitely not the shy/doesn't know she's hot type. She doesn't look like a sl*t, but she had a slightly *****y attitude. She started talking about sex with everyone within 10 minutes of meeting me.
During the conversation, I found out that they actually used to be boyfriend/girlfriend, and as the night went on, it looked more and more that they might "get together for some good time" later.

I almost dropped my jaw(internally ), but didn't let it appear on my face . The only reason I can see that made this guy her boyfriend for some time is that they work together, and it's not just any job. They all work at the movie theater selling tickets and popcorn. In other words, they get a lot of boring free time stuck behind a counter together. So the guy has all his time and opportunities to show his personality, and this without any external interruption/interference/competition.

On the other hand, me being a decent looking guy and having a lot to offer(I'm really not bragging, just telling the truth ), because of my engineering social setting, I almost never meet decent girls just "naturally", I always need to look for it. Clubs, bars, parties, but good girls (LTR material) are just hard to come by.

After all this story telling, my point is this: looks definitely matter. But depending on your social setting, the effect is more or less magnified/reduced. So if you are ugly, try to work on your social setting to make it easier for you. Try to create situations where you are given more time/opportunities to show your personality.

But from my personal experience, you have a little control over your "natural" social setting. By this I don't mean the way you choose your friends or which places you frequent when you go out, but wether you "naturally" get to interact with a lots of HBs for extensive periods of time on a daily basis, through work or other activities.
Sorry for the final negative note, but if there exists a "miracle" method that can for example change my typical engineering "social setting" into a education/marketing/etc type of "social setting", I would have done it a long time ago. Damn I hate my field for that, if it wasn't for the big bucks and the beauty of science...

 

[Dirtheart]

I agree that looks matter considerably, but remember, there's no such thing as universally good looks. You might be stunning to one woman and ugly to another.

Some women start fumbling and act starstruck when I look at them, and then others just aren't attracted to me in the slightest.

Unfortunately, in a casual meeting with someone (a club, cold approach etc), attitude can amplify attraction, but I think it's extremely rare that it can create attraction from nothing.

 

[chicksrock]

I really don't know..
i mean looks do help

In my experience unless you look STUNNINGLY handsome and sexy....then you will get attention from girls.....and a few may even open you first.....

i am talking looking a 9.5 to 10 on a man sexyness scale.

I think courage/confidence/personality/making approaches count for a lot more....i think girls value that.... 2% of guys make approaches.. you differentiate yourself alot if you make approaches and show off your charming personality...

CONCLUSION: looks don't make much of a differrence..unless you are stunningly gorgeous and handsome

 

[Dirtheart]

If your fat and out of shape VS athletic and muscular then you make me look bad.

I think this is an important point. No woman wants to be seen with someone who makes her look like she is desperate and will settle for anyone. A woman wants to feel proud of the man she is with because he reflects on her attractiveness.

The superficial things count, because this is what you convey to the world around you. As Fuzzx said, your posture can define you as a nerd, so can your clothes etc.