"The Coffee Shop Girl You Never Spoke To"

You've replayed it a hundred times. She stood three feet away, scrolling her phone. You had an opening. You composed the perfect line — after she was gone.

For all you know, she's married now. To some guy who said something. Anything.

Openers are cheap. Almost any sentence works when it's delivered within three seconds. The expensive part is the standing there, drafting and deleting, while the window quietly closes.

The "22 Rules" stripped out my hesitation. What to open with, how to keep it alive, and the one habit that costs guys more women than anything else: waiting for perfect.

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Lol, Girl is sooo confusing. Insight?

Bussey

Senior Don Juan
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Alright folks, I haven't been here in ages. I got this stuff quickly and never looked back, and any woman give me a hard time I just nexted her.

So I've been playing the field (In college), nothing serious because that's not what I'm looking for. So I meet a girl in my Spanish course with all her friends there too... flirt with all of them, having a good time, two in particular I'd be into (Girl1 + Girl2). Threw in the 'Cunning Linguist' joke as it was perfect for the situation. Yada yada yada, they love me.

Anyway, I get Girl1's phone number, call her up and say we should do something, she agrees, she's on her own for the weekend so she wants me to go there, figure easy deal right? Wrong.

I get there, some other chick is there, then later some other chick and 3 guys show up... and now they are clearly trying to sabotage me... so the entire 'date' just crashed and burnt... so little flirting, so little conversation even. She has a total disconnect.

Whatever, that's fine with me, her loss. She calls me Thursday asking if I want to do something this weekend. I tell her Im busy tomorrow and Saturday but can do something on Sunday (Which was true I had dates lol). I go over with the initial plans we are going out... One hour in Girl2 and 2 other girls show up... and she just goes dead fish again... doesn't talk to me at all... She's unreceptive to anything... no going to the store, no going out... nothing.

So I talk to the other 2 girls and switch focus to Girl2... not overtly flirtatious because they are friends... I'm dead in the water if I go to flirty. Girl2 totally into me... Girl1 sabotages everything saying I have to go because they are going to do their strippercises lol.

Now Girl2 is quiet around me... and Girl1 is cold as ice. Do I call her on it? ie. 'Whats up with you being so cold lately?'. I've always been really honest in all my relationships and demand it from them. I can take or leave her... but she has hot friends, but she's now Gatekeeper, so its just tossed me through a loop.

Ideas?
 

"She Liked You in March. It's October Now."

Attraction runs on a clock.

She flirted for weeks. Touched your arm. Found reasons to be alone with you. And you were careful. Respectful. Waiting for the right moment.

The moment had a shelf life. It expired around month two, and by the time you asked her out, she'd quietly filed you under "little brother."

One of the hardest lessons inside the 22 Rules: women rarely wait. Interest either grows or it decays, and nothing decays it faster than a man who never moves.

Make the move while she's still inventing reasons to be near you.

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GHardy

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You are sabotaging yourself going for two different girls that are friends. It sounds like they might both like you, but won't show it in front of the other becuase they are friends and won't openly go for you around each other.

You're probably going to have to pick one and then try the direct approach you were thinking of using (i.e., "Why so cold lately?"). You won't really know what to do next until you hear the answer to that question.
 

Phyzzle

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I totally would have asked for girl 2's number.

Girl #1 has met you how many times? And yet she's still wierded out by being alone with you?

Insisting on group dates = ZERO interest. The only exception is meeting online, or some other situation where she should be cautious.

If you flirt with another girl, and the 1st chick says "that's rude", ask her why. If she says she's on a date with you, say "we are? Well, let's go then." And stand up, take her hand and lead her to some other place.
 

Distant Light

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Bradp talks about this basically you day 2ed on her terms and she brought you into her world. What some girls like to do is call all the guys the know to meet with them that way you can be like there orbiter. This is why you see all her friends showed up and other guys because now your just part of like her fan club.
 

“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”

Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.

Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers.  Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.

I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.

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Bussey

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Yep I agree with that Distant Light, but it wasn't planned on her part. She was supposed to be alone all weekend, no roommate nothing, they'd all gone home, and I confirmed that with one of them who I have in another of my classes.

They just showed up. But regardless, it doesn't matter to me lol, my world revolves around me. So I figure I'll just go for Girl2... who the **** cares what happens, I have nothing to lose lol.
 
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