LJBF'ed... because of Neediness / Jealousy issues

[Argyle]

I know, I know... according to the rules of the game, if a woman LJBF's you, you should walk away like a man.

I know that there are some escape-LJBF mechanisms in place... like turning on alpha game, scarcity, push-pull, and escalating. But I believe these are best used on LJBF's where she never saw you like that to begin with.

But what if you get LJBF'ed after she expressed a strong like for you... because you end up showing AFC traits like neediness and jealousy; and ****ed up because you may have been too blatant about sex at one point.

Is there a way out of that type of LJBF zone? I don't have one-itis for her, but I do want to **** her. Even if it takes a long time, I don't mind because I'll be spinning plates for a long time anyway. Would this situation even be a worse type of LJBF than the one where the girl never noticed the beta man's interest in her?

Will gradually displaying alpha traits and exuding that frame around her get her to turn around? I'm going to be living/optimizing my life, but just wanted to know what the probability of success with this one is.

Thanks.

 

[scrouds]

Nope. Best you could hope for is a rebound fuuck between when she gets dumped by a bad boy and when she comes crawling back to him craving more.

 

[Argyle]

She's studying abroad until this winter time, when she returns from school.

I figured, the best possible road I can take would be to go no contact (and only let her initiate) for the next month or so... and then reinitiate contact after that timeframe. It would sort of give things a fresh re-start, no?

I'd still like to hang out with her when she visits back here again.

 

[( . )( . )]

Loveagain.com "Date older women"

Lawd wept.. these advertisements aren't even trying anymore. Some slogged out old hor ravaged by sun and semen wearing a blonde wig which looks like it was found in the dumpster to offset her thick black eyebrows.

Isn't that what they call a "conflict of interest" to a mens self improvement site?

 

[Argyle]

No other comments?

 

[Atom Smasher]

I think that target fixation is detrimental to a man.

Cut bait and find someone who is interested.

 

[Argyle]

Gotcha. Have every intention to doing that. Have plans on improving every aspect of my life. Just wanted to know if this was recoverable. And if so, i am sure it would have to be because i no longer show any form of neediness.

 

[GADavid]

It can happen. One chick gave me a harsh LJBF talk after I got super jealous and needy. I severely limited my contact with her and got busy doing my own thing. Came back happy and being a man so I got her. Just don't fall back into the rut... its easy to do.

 

[Alle_Gory]

I think that target fixation is detrimental to a man.

Cut bait and find someone who is interested.

^ Listen to this man. He knows.

Your issues with jealousy and neediness you need to address because this will happen again and ruin everything. Again. Do you want to repeat the same things over and over?

Deal with it. Now.

Is there a way out of that type of LJBF zone?

There is no LJBF zone. Repeat after me. There is no LJBF zone. It's all in your mind and a result of your actions.

The reason she's not sleeping with you is because she doesn't want to, and you're not giving her any good reasons to.

Will gradually displaying alpha traits and exuding that frame around her get her to turn around? I'm going to be living/optimizing my life, but just wanted to know what the probability of success with this one is.

Who cares. Fix your sh*t because it needs to be fixed. Whether or not she comes around is irrelevant. You think pursuing and getting her will make you happy. It won't. When you're happy and you do what you want will make you even more happy.

Be happy. Make a happy lifestyle and make yourself attractive and everything you want to be. Whether or not she's there won't even matter. But someone will be there, someone even better if you want.

 

[Argyle]

Great!

Thanks, GADavid. This really made my day.

I'm in the process of moving on now. We're still "BFF's"... but I've decided to start distancing myself from her (I.E. don't contact her unless she contacts me). Just got back from meeting some great people tonight. I think that's the first step.

She'll come back around.

 

[Argyle]

^ Listen to this man. He knows.

Your issues with jealousy and neediness you need to address because this will happen again and ruin everything. Again. Do you want to repeat the same things over and over?

Deal with it. Now.

Definitely plan on dealing with these issues... as even they (jealousy and neediness) caught me by surprise.

I think a lot of it had to do with the fact that we were only communicating via Skype, email and Facebook. There was no way for me to connect with her intimately on an intimate level, so it made me insecure about my ability to have her bond with me deeper.

Still, as a student of the game, such AFC mentality should have never crept up to me. Won't happen again!

 

[Alle_Gory]

Thanks, GADavid. This really made my day.

Because he told you what you want to hear. You want to hear that it will be alright for you to continue thinking about this girl who in the grand scheme of things is probably not even important at all...

The world doesn't owe you anything. Even if you go through all the motions and do EXACTLY what is necessary to win back this girl, you probably won't. Why? Because the world doesn't owe you anything and things are not that cut and dry.

 

[Argyle]

Because he told you what you want to hear. You want to hear that it will be alright for you to continue thinking about this girl who in the grand scheme of things is probably not even important at all...

The world doesn't owe you anything. Even if you go through all the motions and do EXACTLY what is necessary to win back this girl, you probably won't. Why? Because the world doesn't owe you anything and things are not that cut and dry.

You're right.

But worth a shot though, no? If I'm out there gaming and focusing on other things, why does it hurt if I want to keep a former one-itis on the backburner?

 

[DonJuanabe]

When you like one particular girl you end up focusing on her too much. That's why spinning plates is important. But even if you don't spin plates, the girl must not be on the forefront of your mind. Your focus should be career, home, fitness, family, friends, education, hobbies -- the girl is a nice addition to these things -- if you don't date or bang her you really don't care because you have more important things going on in your life. This prevents jealousy and neediness.

 

[Alle_Gory]

You're right.

If only the world was fair. You do what you need to and you get the girl. You work long and hard and you get the promotion at work. You take care of yourself and you live a long and happy life.

It doesn't. It's a chaotic fvcking mess and the only thing you can do is fight it every single fvcking day and have hope that it gets easier. Because it doesn't go away. You can either change and adapt to things as they are or be miserable.

Hell, you might even get hit by a bus tomorrow morning. Turns out the driver was texting and not paying attention. Whoops. Do what you can. Fight the bull****. Enjoy everything you can because everything only happens once, and there's no guarantee you'll be around the next day.

But worth a shot though, no? If I'm out there gaming and focusing on other things, why does it hurt if I want to keep a former one-itis on the backburner?

Because you're not truly free. She still has you. That twisted jealous part of your mind still has you and it's wearing a mask that looks like your beautiful one-itis. Oh it's just a memory, oh maybe you'll run into her once in awhile and keep tabs. Oh who is she with? Damn, I don't really like that guy, why isn't that me? I need to work harder and do the right things that she would like...

Meanwhile you're just feeding the bad part of your mind. The more you think about something and the more you indulge in something the more it has you.

It's an addiction I suppose.