LJBF help, please

[mikeraw]

This girl is about to LJBF me. Basically she already has, which I played long with because she LJBF'ed another guy a while ago and he gave her the "I-have-friends-already-I'm-wasting-my-time-with-you" speech, which is what I would normally do, too, but I'm this close to banging her.

So we're having dinner on WED and I need a little advice here on how to steer things my way. I've done it before, but it's usually just a combination of luck and skill... mostly luck.

Any pointers to avoid the damn LJBF thing? I have to go for the kill that night.

 

[Jeffst1980]

You need to elaborate on this situation--what you have posted doesn't really make any sense.

Are you dating this girl or are you just friends? What makes you think you're this close to banging her??

I will say that, if things are progressing and you are indeed close to banging, a "LJBF" line could just be a bit of LMR that is easily overcome.

 

[mikeraw]

This girl and I met sort of through match.com She contacted me asking me if I had gone to school in Austin and I said no, but apparently we HAD met at a party in Austin cuz she knew a bunch of my friends from over there. She then added me to her MSN messenger, which I have no idea how she got my email, so she's a resourceful girl and was obviously interested.

We went out, bottle of wine, laughs, kiss on the cheek, good night. Then one night I took her out again and once in her apt. things started happening. Last time we went out, her friend was staying with her, couldn't do anything, but kiss like teenagers outside her apt. (she has a one room loft)

So we're not dating, we're friends.

Thing is that we've been on her bed making out hardcore... I always carry condoms except that night! haha So no sex when I had to do it.

I think that with a little alcohol we'll be fooling around in no time, but the thing is for her to invite me up to her apt... We're both amateur wine connoiseurs, so I'll just approach it from that angle, again.

I like the whole date cancelling thing, but I don't want to look like a sore loser.

 

[Jeffst1980]

If you've already broken the barrier of making out, you're not "just friends."

I think what you're saying is that you were introduced to her friend as "just a friend." That's not anything to worry about!!

I think you're fearful for absolutely nothing. This girl has given you NO REASON to believe she isn't interested. Keep doing what you're doing and keep escalating things. Don't let a fear of LJBF cramp your style.

I agree that dinner dates are not optimal at this point in time. Can you cancel and instead suggest something fun?? It'll be MUCH easier to get her in a playful, turned on state by doing something active and even silly.

 

[mikeraw]

I actually HAVE to cancel the date because apparently I set one up with another plate. (I didn't remember because I was wasted when I did it... eheheh)

So any suggestions for an activity? Movie dates suck and I don't think she wants to drink around me, so wine dates are off.

About the LJBF status, she told me that she doesn't want to be friends with benefits. That she enjoys being with me. Hmmm what else? It was on messenger and I was at work and had to close the window a few times... I'm probably overreacting. Now I'm just worried about what activity to do with her if not dinner. Bowling! Haven't done that in years, so she might beat me. Or one of those Dave & Buster places. Anything else?

On a more positive note, I did bang a 21 yr old this Saturday... High five!

 

[mikeraw]

UPDATE

I cancelled the date, unfortunately over a text message because:

1. She was at the movies

2. I was on my way to see another of my plates, so I wasn't going to be able to be on the phone.

I suggested D&B for THUR or Mixers and Elixirs on SAT (it's a museum thing here in Houston where you can mingle with young people while having ****tails and walking through the exhibits with Jazz in the background). She said her parents were visiting over the weekend while ignoring the THUR proposal.

Oh well. I will run into her eventually, so whatever. Needless to say, I'll try something then.

Unless you guys have any suggestions on how to get out of this one I'm calling this one a lost battle. Thanks for your advice/input.

 

[FM 3321]

Why not just be her friend? Still flirt, have fun and tease her but don't "push" her to be more than friends. I would have still gone along with the "date" and had a good time no matter what happened.