So I've never dated anyone, or had sex, or kissed. I have very little money and little to no confidence. I act confident, but I'm not. I'm extremely nervous around women, people push me around, and I'm very unmotivated. I also have some anxiety problems that therapy is not really helping. This is due mostly to the fact that I grew up without very much attention from my parents. The basic emotional maturity is not there. I care way too much about what people think of me to be the person I want to be. That's basically my problems in a nutshell....
“The 22 Rules That Flip the Script With Women… And How You Can Use Them Tonight”
Most guys accidentally kill attraction before they even speak. They assume they need a bigger bank account, a better physique, or smoother lines. They miss the point.
Female desire operates on a specific set of psychological triggers. Break them, and you're invisible. Follow them, and you become magnetic.
I learned this the hard way. Years of freezing up. Getting friend-zoned. Watching other guys walk away with the girl I wanted. Then I discovered a set of 22 simple rules that rewired my entire approach.
Life all in a bunch. Need help with love, money, confidence, peace, etc.
- Thread starter bboy
- Start date
Just because a woman listens to you and acts interested in what you say doesn't mean she really is. She might just be acting polite, while silently wishing that the date would hurry up and end, or that you would go away... and never come back.
Quote taken from The SoSuave Guide to Women and Dating, which you can read for FREE.
Well then...it's time to get your life together. Am I right? Do you agree?
It's time to right this ship and get you sailing on the right path to pvssy galore land and a fat wallet and a rock solid confidence level.
Prologue: Forget girls. To get your life in order, you need all the mental energy you have to focus on your life first. Girls will come in time.
1. You obviously realize that your past is not that great. You've dealt with your fair share of troubles. However, it's time to let all of that go. Release all the guilt, shame, and fear that you have built up in your life.
To do this, start by cutting off all ties with people that hold you back in life. Any unhealthy relationships...cease them. Whether that is your pot-smoking buddy, your one-itis, the guy who hooks you up with free pizza...all of that needs to stop.
Start exercising. Start lifting and running. The main objective here isn't to get ripped, it's to start changing your mindset. To clear all of the negativity you have and start breaking you down so you can rebuild yourself.
Stop watching p0rn. Stop jerking the meatstick. Any unhealthy addictions...STOP THEM ALL.
2. Get a job. You have little money. This is a big issue. However, it is fixable. Get a job, and start cutting any unnecessary expense that you have. Do you spend $400 bucks on videogames a month? Well...stop that.
Start saving money and increasing your wealth slowly. Not only does increasing the money in your bank account benefit you monetary, it truly decreases a lot of stress.
3. As you start becoming more fit and start saving your money, it's time to relax and have fun sometimes. Release your stress through organized sports, take a dance class, do something extracurricular. Something that you legitimately enjoy and something that you can talk about which makes you interesting.
4. Now you're becoming even more fit, have more money, and are doing some fun things that you can talk about. Now, it's time to start becoming even more well-rounded. You start that by SETTING GOALS.
Set goals for yourself. A short-term goal (4 weeks), an intermediate goal (4-6 months), and a long-term goal (1 year).
A short-term goal can be anything from watching a new movie that came out, to making a new friend.
An intermediate goal is something like: getting better in your salsa dance class or something.
And everyone...and I mean EVERYONE, needs a long-term goal. I set a goal each year where I have to accomplish something big. That might range from buying a new car, to finding a better place to live, to go skydiving. Every year you need to do something big in your life.
With set goals that are accomplishable, not only does that motivate you but it also molds you into something that has EXPERIENCE in life.
5. Now, it's time to start learning how to talk to people in a way that portrays you as someone that is worth their time. And by now, you SHOULD be worth people's time.
I believe that telling yourself "you're the $hit" when you aren't, only works to an extent. Basically, faking it till you make is not a long-term cure.
However, since you actually have things going for you in life now, you CAN start telling yourself you are the $hit, because when you reflect on your progress, you ARE the $hit.
Start looking people in the eye. Start walking straighter. FEEL AND ACKNOWLEDGE your progress and strides that you have made. By now, you shouldn't have to tell yourself to feel proud of yourself. By you accomplishing your goals, doing fun things, getting wealthier and fitter, it should come naturally.
6. Now that you are progressing internally, it's time to take it to an external level: how to talk to people.
When I see a friend, I greet them loudly with a smile and head nod, and then a strong handshake and often a slap on the back. Be genuinely happy to see them. This makes them feel special and it sets the tone for the conversation.
Ask them how they've been. Ask them what their currently doing in life. Be balanced in asking questions and talking about your experiences. Here is an example:
You: Yo Mark! How's it going man long time no see
Mark: Hey bro not much man just tied down a new job and the girlfriend is still going strong
You: That's awesome to hear man. Where are you working now?
Mark: Barron's Automative Shop, I just became the manager for the branches in the area.
You: Congrats man that's badass. Yeah, I've been trying to get my life in order these past few months and it's been going great. Got a new job, moved out of my parent's place, and the money is starting to flow in.
Mark: Great to see that man hope you keep that up.
You: For sure. Hey let's catch up and grab a few drinks this Friday. It's been a while since I've went out. Bring your girlfriend out too I haven't seen her in awhile haha,
Mark: Sounds like a plan. You know what, she has a friend that she can probably bring too. I've heard she's a looker.
You: Hah, now I know why I keep you as a friend.
Mark: A-hole.
You: Jk bro, hey I gotta run it was great to see you man.
What can you learn from that? You learn when is the time to ask questions and when it's time to stop asking and start telling. Talk animatedly about what you've done. INTRIGUE people. Then, start setting up plans to do things. People love a go-getter.
A conversation tip is to look for the nouns they mention. Oh the guy mentioned a new job, his girlfriend, and Barron's Automative? You can expand on any of those topics.
7. Winner's Mindset
Ok bboy. By now...you should be lightyears of where you were on 6-24-2013.
You're fit.
You have more monetary options.
You have quit unhealthy addictions.
You've cut off bad relationships.
You start becoming a go-getter.
You're doing fun things.
You're setting goals for yourself and accomplishing them.
You start building authentic confidence.
You start knowing how to talk and engage people better through your enthusiasm and your experiences you can share and talk about.
So what now? Well now it's time to STEP IT UP EVEN MORE. Develop a sensational winner's mindset.
Know that it's not how much you want something that matters, it's if you're willing to do the distance to get what you want.
You should have a great work ethic and genuine motivation by now. So developing a great mindset should be EASY, NOT FORCED.
Start thinking with a successful winner's mind. Every opportunity, every experience, every situation.
You start thinking about things differently because you are no longer in that victim's mindset.
You start feeling more genuinely happy and confident...even ****y?
Nowadays, to truly succeed, you have to be confident and even ****y. The bashful and the meek get left behind. I'm not condoning being a d0uche at all. Instead, this is the COMPLETE OPPOSITE.
Start becoming a good confident, and a good ****y. This essentially means you truly believe in yourself and your abilities. Nothing more, and nothing less. It doesn't mean be an a-hole.
Instead, start HELPING people to achieve their goals. Start GIVING value.The more value you GIVE, the more your value INCREASES.
8. Reflection Time.
Before you know it, the long and touch road to get to where you are has shaped itself into a rewardable journey.
Now is the time to look back and truly take pride in how far you have come.
Here is a quote which I live by.
If no one has worked as hard as you, don't be bashful about being the best. Enjoy it. Stand up and own what you are good at.
Summary:
This process might take 2 years to accomplish. It might take 5. Or 7. However, if you truly set your mind on getting out the $hit hole you are in...you can do it.
You say what about girls? Forget the girls. Girls will come in time. You will find that they flock to you when you least expect it. They'll come calling when you don't go calling. They'll be there when you're busy with other things.
Hopefully you can set your mind to get your life in order, and not fall trap to easier solution which is to stay in your current status forever.
Hope this has helped.
Be a fvking gladiator bro.
One last thing: If you have trouble finding motivation when starting out...try this. IMAGINE all the people that have wronged you...all the guys, girls, condescending "friends" that have looked down on you and told you that you were worth less than dog $hit on a hot Arizona day.
Now...imagine seeing them in a few years when you are the NEW you. How they will not be able to believe how you've changed...how you are a one-man wolf pack, throwing ****y gazes at tight women's arses while they are stuck with a dead end job and their girlfriend is cheating on them with some rich banker.
Imagine how SATISFYING that will feel to know that you truly did work harder than all of them, and that you bask in your success and prestige and your new life while THEY get the meager scraps in the game called life.
~BSmooth
It's time to right this ship and get you sailing on the right path to pvssy galore land and a fat wallet and a rock solid confidence level.
Prologue: Forget girls. To get your life in order, you need all the mental energy you have to focus on your life first. Girls will come in time.
1. You obviously realize that your past is not that great. You've dealt with your fair share of troubles. However, it's time to let all of that go. Release all the guilt, shame, and fear that you have built up in your life.
To do this, start by cutting off all ties with people that hold you back in life. Any unhealthy relationships...cease them. Whether that is your pot-smoking buddy, your one-itis, the guy who hooks you up with free pizza...all of that needs to stop.
Start exercising. Start lifting and running. The main objective here isn't to get ripped, it's to start changing your mindset. To clear all of the negativity you have and start breaking you down so you can rebuild yourself.
Stop watching p0rn. Stop jerking the meatstick. Any unhealthy addictions...STOP THEM ALL.
2. Get a job. You have little money. This is a big issue. However, it is fixable. Get a job, and start cutting any unnecessary expense that you have. Do you spend $400 bucks on videogames a month? Well...stop that.
Start saving money and increasing your wealth slowly. Not only does increasing the money in your bank account benefit you monetary, it truly decreases a lot of stress.
3. As you start becoming more fit and start saving your money, it's time to relax and have fun sometimes. Release your stress through organized sports, take a dance class, do something extracurricular. Something that you legitimately enjoy and something that you can talk about which makes you interesting.
4. Now you're becoming even more fit, have more money, and are doing some fun things that you can talk about. Now, it's time to start becoming even more well-rounded. You start that by SETTING GOALS.
Set goals for yourself. A short-term goal (4 weeks), an intermediate goal (4-6 months), and a long-term goal (1 year).
A short-term goal can be anything from watching a new movie that came out, to making a new friend.
An intermediate goal is something like: getting better in your salsa dance class or something.
And everyone...and I mean EVERYONE, needs a long-term goal. I set a goal each year where I have to accomplish something big. That might range from buying a new car, to finding a better place to live, to go skydiving. Every year you need to do something big in your life.
With set goals that are accomplishable, not only does that motivate you but it also molds you into something that has EXPERIENCE in life.
5. Now, it's time to start learning how to talk to people in a way that portrays you as someone that is worth their time. And by now, you SHOULD be worth people's time.
I believe that telling yourself "you're the $hit" when you aren't, only works to an extent. Basically, faking it till you make is not a long-term cure.
However, since you actually have things going for you in life now, you CAN start telling yourself you are the $hit, because when you reflect on your progress, you ARE the $hit.
Start looking people in the eye. Start walking straighter. FEEL AND ACKNOWLEDGE your progress and strides that you have made. By now, you shouldn't have to tell yourself to feel proud of yourself. By you accomplishing your goals, doing fun things, getting wealthier and fitter, it should come naturally.
6. Now that you are progressing internally, it's time to take it to an external level: how to talk to people.
When I see a friend, I greet them loudly with a smile and head nod, and then a strong handshake and often a slap on the back. Be genuinely happy to see them. This makes them feel special and it sets the tone for the conversation.
Ask them how they've been. Ask them what their currently doing in life. Be balanced in asking questions and talking about your experiences. Here is an example:
You: Yo Mark! How's it going man long time no see
Mark: Hey bro not much man just tied down a new job and the girlfriend is still going strong
You: That's awesome to hear man. Where are you working now?
Mark: Barron's Automative Shop, I just became the manager for the branches in the area.
You: Congrats man that's badass. Yeah, I've been trying to get my life in order these past few months and it's been going great. Got a new job, moved out of my parent's place, and the money is starting to flow in.
Mark: Great to see that man hope you keep that up.
You: For sure. Hey let's catch up and grab a few drinks this Friday. It's been a while since I've went out. Bring your girlfriend out too I haven't seen her in awhile haha,
Mark: Sounds like a plan. You know what, she has a friend that she can probably bring too. I've heard she's a looker.
You: Hah, now I know why I keep you as a friend.
Mark: A-hole.
You: Jk bro, hey I gotta run it was great to see you man.
What can you learn from that? You learn when is the time to ask questions and when it's time to stop asking and start telling. Talk animatedly about what you've done. INTRIGUE people. Then, start setting up plans to do things. People love a go-getter.
A conversation tip is to look for the nouns they mention. Oh the guy mentioned a new job, his girlfriend, and Barron's Automative? You can expand on any of those topics.
7. Winner's Mindset
Ok bboy. By now...you should be lightyears of where you were on 6-24-2013.
You're fit.
You have more monetary options.
You have quit unhealthy addictions.
You've cut off bad relationships.
You start becoming a go-getter.
You're doing fun things.
You're setting goals for yourself and accomplishing them.
You start building authentic confidence.
You start knowing how to talk and engage people better through your enthusiasm and your experiences you can share and talk about.
So what now? Well now it's time to STEP IT UP EVEN MORE. Develop a sensational winner's mindset.
Know that it's not how much you want something that matters, it's if you're willing to do the distance to get what you want.
You should have a great work ethic and genuine motivation by now. So developing a great mindset should be EASY, NOT FORCED.
Start thinking with a successful winner's mind. Every opportunity, every experience, every situation.
You start thinking about things differently because you are no longer in that victim's mindset.
You start feeling more genuinely happy and confident...even ****y?
Nowadays, to truly succeed, you have to be confident and even ****y. The bashful and the meek get left behind. I'm not condoning being a d0uche at all. Instead, this is the COMPLETE OPPOSITE.
Start becoming a good confident, and a good ****y. This essentially means you truly believe in yourself and your abilities. Nothing more, and nothing less. It doesn't mean be an a-hole.
Instead, start HELPING people to achieve their goals. Start GIVING value.The more value you GIVE, the more your value INCREASES.
8. Reflection Time.
Before you know it, the long and touch road to get to where you are has shaped itself into a rewardable journey.
Now is the time to look back and truly take pride in how far you have come.
Here is a quote which I live by.
If no one has worked as hard as you, don't be bashful about being the best. Enjoy it. Stand up and own what you are good at.
Summary:
This process might take 2 years to accomplish. It might take 5. Or 7. However, if you truly set your mind on getting out the $hit hole you are in...you can do it.
You say what about girls? Forget the girls. Girls will come in time. You will find that they flock to you when you least expect it. They'll come calling when you don't go calling. They'll be there when you're busy with other things.
Hopefully you can set your mind to get your life in order, and not fall trap to easier solution which is to stay in your current status forever.
Hope this has helped.
Be a fvking gladiator bro.
One last thing: If you have trouble finding motivation when starting out...try this. IMAGINE all the people that have wronged you...all the guys, girls, condescending "friends" that have looked down on you and told you that you were worth less than dog $hit on a hot Arizona day.
Now...imagine seeing them in a few years when you are the NEW you. How they will not be able to believe how you've changed...how you are a one-man wolf pack, throwing ****y gazes at tight women's arses while they are stuck with a dead end job and their girlfriend is cheating on them with some rich banker.
Imagine how SATISFYING that will feel to know that you truly did work harder than all of them, and that you bask in your success and prestige and your new life while THEY get the meager scraps in the game called life.
~BSmooth
3agle 3yes
Master Don Juan
- Joined
- Aug 22, 2012
- Messages
- 540
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- 253
- Age
- 39
^^^ Great advice right there, better read it. Better read this too...
I'm going to alert you to a power. This power is GREATER than you're lack of sex, GREATER than your lack of intimacy, GREATER than all the money a man could ever have in the world.
It is a power each of us has and you are using it right NOW.
Regardless of whether you're religious or not I'm going to quote Hebrews 11:3.
"By faith we understand that the universe was formed at God’s command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible.
What is seen is NOT made out of what is visible.
There was a fat woman who was on her FIFTH diet. After the first week she weighed herself, she lost 3 pounds. Some weeks later she lost more, the next week she lost more and more and more...until eventually she was happy when she looked in the mirror. When this happened she quit her diet.
Six months later, she was back to being fat again.
What happened?
The mistake many people make with problems, is that they treat SYMPTOMS instead of CAUSES.
The fat woman was paying too much attention to her weight, rather than the way she THOUGHT about food and exercise.
If she thought DIFFERENTLY about food and exercise and focused on that INSTEAD OF HER WEIGHT she would be slim.
Don't pay attention to your shortcomings, realise you're the reason why they came about and they came about because you AREN'T thinking about improving your life.
Everything you see in the world today, was originally in someone else's mind.
We actually CREATE our own reality...
I'm going to alert you to a power. This power is GREATER than you're lack of sex, GREATER than your lack of intimacy, GREATER than all the money a man could ever have in the world.
It is a power each of us has and you are using it right NOW.
Regardless of whether you're religious or not I'm going to quote Hebrews 11:3.
"By faith we understand that the universe was formed at God’s command, so that what is seen was not made out of what was visible.
What is seen is NOT made out of what is visible.
There was a fat woman who was on her FIFTH diet. After the first week she weighed herself, she lost 3 pounds. Some weeks later she lost more, the next week she lost more and more and more...until eventually she was happy when she looked in the mirror. When this happened she quit her diet.
Six months later, she was back to being fat again.
What happened?
The mistake many people make with problems, is that they treat SYMPTOMS instead of CAUSES.
The fat woman was paying too much attention to her weight, rather than the way she THOUGHT about food and exercise.
If she thought DIFFERENTLY about food and exercise and focused on that INSTEAD OF HER WEIGHT she would be slim.
Don't pay attention to your shortcomings, realise you're the reason why they came about and they came about because you AREN'T thinking about improving your life.
Everything you see in the world today, was originally in someone else's mind.
We actually CREATE our own reality...
LiveFreeX
Banned
Date an asian girl, you sound like an asian guy.
@bboy
Just following up.
It's your call to improve your life bro. I can be a d!ck on here sometimes but I like to help people out when they truly need some.
99/100 people will not do what it takes to get their life in order. That's why so many people in our society are so messed up.
Take charge.
~BSmooth
Just following up.
It's your call to improve your life bro. I can be a d!ck on here sometimes but I like to help people out when they truly need some.
99/100 people will not do what it takes to get their life in order. That's why so many people in our society are so messed up.
Take charge.
~BSmooth