Life after College/Grad School

[optimusprime]

After a guy graduates from college and does not go to college parties anymore, how do you get women? The hook-up pickup probably does not work in bars or clubs, because it is not an enclosed environment like a frat house or a college campus. But hooking-up is mostly what is done in college. What's the scene when you enter the real world? I would argue that "asking out" does not work in the real world, since that was my experience from college.

No one goes on dates anymore. Thanks to feminism and the other developments, it is just "hook-up" time. Very attractive women tend to have extremely low self-esteem, so they want to be treated "badly" in an emotional sense. Basically, you both get drunk and hook-up, then next her. Or if you remember her name, you guys will simply go into a relationship. In this day and age, a "relationship" is simply a friends with benefits type of arrangement.

If a HB has been in a sorority, she has been programmed to be treated badly. When you suggest dinner or a movie, you come across as a chump. Attractive women get these offers all the time. So should you suggest that you guys meet up at a bar and get drinks? Again, attractive women have very low self-esteem and get offers of dinners all the time. If you are a ****y, confident, and funny guy, all you need to do is get them drunk. That being said, I am not the most confident guy and I do not know how to do the ****y and funny way; but I know it works because guys much less good-looking than me and poorer got women that I messed my chances with due to AFC stuff like "let's go to dinner." In fact, I do not want to do the "drunken hook-up" thing, but attractive women do not want nice guys. So how do you bag women after college and grad since it is a hook-up world but the "hooking-up" environment is not there outside of college?

 

[Phyzzle]

I would argue that "asking out" does not work in the real world, since that was my experience from college.

No, I think you'll find the opposite. The classic getting the digits and setting up a brief cup of coffee is a lot more useful in the real world.

So should you suggest that you guys meet up at a bar and get drinks?

You can. But in my post-college years, I have met plenty of 27 year old women who just don't drink. They graduated college, and just put that part of their lives behind them. Even at 27, if a career woman has a beer at 9, she's probably yawning by 9:30.

The difference is time and energy. You don't need to be energetic and bouncing off the walls, the loudest guy in the room, interrupting everybody, to get any female attention like you did in college. You do need to ask for digits, though. You can't just slowly warm up to a girl, because people just don't have time to "hang out" in the same few places every day.

 

[Colossus]

Doing things, whether it be dinner, coffee, a concert, something outdoors, or whatever serves more of a purpose outside of college.

College is definitely a hook-up environment. All the right factors are there. Freedom from parents, the communal atmosphere, classes and dorms, and of course the critical ingredient alcohol. Its like if you hang out sober with a girl its almost awkward. You dont 'ask-out' in college, you just hang out and hook up. Your assesment is correct; if you 'ask-out' you're generally a tool.

Once you are out of that arena approaching becomes critical. The easiness of wheeling girls in college doesnt translate into adult life. You can still do the 'hang-out' thing, but the hang outs should have some sort of purpose. Like come over and ill cook dinner, or lets go see this and go here afterwards.

I know a few guys who had little game but still did alright in college, and now that they have graduated and moved into the working world they realize how easy they had it. "Dont ever leave, dude" is what they tell me. A lot of your post-college success with women has to do with your location...if you live and work in a fairly rural area you will have a much more difficult time meeting women, generally speaking. If you live and/or work in a city, there are more social mediums to explore.

Its very easy to get into the "get up, go to work, come home" routine. Before you know it, you havent gotten laid in months and your game is like a sick little deer. The good thing about game is that you can always build it, just like your muscles. If you do nothing, it goes away. If you regularly put it to use, it grows.

Having been both in and out of the college life, I believe the key is to stay active. Dont let yourself get into that dreadful routine. That means doing things that are uncomfortable from time to time. Dont just rely on the bars/clubs, do other things you enjoy that will put you in contact with different people. That may sound like lame advice, but it usually is that simple. Kind of a cousin of the shotgun approach.

 

[eyedogg]

I agree with Colossus - the older you get and the more involved you get in your work life, with no outlet regarding "approaching" - "seeking" women then the harder it can be. You need to keep "excercising" your game were ever you go. The store, the mall, the park, etc.