Lied About Past Relationships

[naes]

So I had sex for the first time with this girl about a month ago. After a few times I made the mistake of asking her how many guys she has had sex with and got an answer I didn't want to hear. However when she asked me the same question I lied and said I had sex with 3 girls.

Back then we were only dating so I kind of said it to make myself look better, but now it's starting to turn into a relationship and I feel really bad about lying to her about that number; Especially since I'm pretty sure she was honest with her answer. Also, I have this weird impression now that girls have sex with much more than they usually say, so my perception of girls has taken a drastic hit.

So I guess it's a two part question

How do you deal with the fact that a girl has had a lot more sex partners than you?

and

Should I tell her that she was my first? It's kind of eating away at me and I do want to tell her, but I don't want to make myself look bad. Did you guys want your first lay to know that she was it?

 

[I.A.F.Y.B.]

Don't tell her you were her first. Second, If you cant stomache how many guys she had you should not of asked. It's in the past so you cant do sh!t. Only thing that matters now is if you are happy with her in the present. If you feel like she is some big hor who you cant trust git rid of her now! Or else you won't be able to trust her later on in the relationship and things will go down hill.

 

[lildevil]

So I had sex for the first time with this girl about a month ago. After a few times I made the mistake of asking her how many guys she has had sex with and got an answer I didn't want to hear. However when she asked me the same question I lied and said I had sex with 3 girls.

Back then we were only dating so I kind of said it to make myself look better, but now it's starting to turn into a relationship and I feel really bad about lying to her about that number; Especially since I'm pretty sure she was honest with her answer. Also, I have this weird impression now that girls have sex with much more than they usually say, so my perception of girls has taken a drastic hit.

So I guess it's a two part question

How do you deal with the fact that a girl has had a lot more sex partners than you?

and

Should I tell her that she was my first? It's kind of eating away at me and I do want to tell her, but I don't want to make myself look bad. Did you guys want your first lay to know that she was it?

Only look at things in an adult way she has more experienced for god sakes most giorls have sex by the time their at least 18....Its only us guys the ones...who seem to need to make a statement for ourselves...


Please don't get the desease that now its looking better for u....that your going to go backwards and make u seem like a wimp.....

 

[naes]

Please don't get the desease that now its looking better for u....that your going to go backwards and make u seem like a wimp.....

I appreciate the response, but I'm not sure what this line means. Could you elaborate a little?

 

[Last Man Standing]

Why are you having a "relationship" with her? Is she worthy? Is she special? If yes, how so?

What you'll come to realize is that none of these girls are special - treat them as such!

 

[naes]

Why are you having a "relationship" with her? Is she worthy? Is she special? If yes, how so?

What you'll come to realize is that none of these girls are special - treat them as such!

none of what girls are special?

 

[Last Man Standing]

none of what girls are special?

These hors!!

 

[I Am Sam]

Ok these guys aren't really helping I can see... so here we go.

You NEED TO BE HONEST to maintain a strong relationship. Some things are okay to fib about, but if you don't tell her, it's just gonna eat at you.

Have you had sex with her more than that first time? If so and things are looking good in the relationship... sit her down and straight up tell her, "I was nervous to tell you when we started dating, but you were actually the first person I've had sex with. I just wanted to tell you that."

She's NOT gonna freak out at you for it. If anything she'll be happy she took your V-Card!

 

[ilikeburritos]

Ask what she thought about the first time you two had sex and be like "so I was pretty good for a virgin eh?"

 

[shaunuk]

Eh, what the ****, don't listen to sam. Don't friggin tell her you were a virgin before her for christ's sake. Just leave it. Forget about it. Worry about something that actually matters man, we all tell lies from time to time

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

How do you deal with the fact that a girl has had a lot more sex partners than you?

The better question is why it matters to you so much.

and

Should I tell her that she was my first? It's kind of eating away at me and I do want to tell her, but I don't want to make myself look bad. Did you guys want your first lay to know that she was it?

Better question is why do you feel that you need to tell her? How would this be beneficial?

 

[naes]

The better question is why it matters to you so much.

Better question is why do you feel that you need to tell her? How would this be beneficial?

That's a good point. Maybe I have this image in my head that the first time is supposed to be special. Thinking back on your first time, I've always thought it would be something that is shared, no? I guess since I'm the only one losing it, I'm the only one that needs to know. I'm not sure, but I do know that theres something in the back of my head telling me I should let her know and I'm not sure why.

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

That's a good point. Maybe I have this image in my head that the first time is supposed to be special. Thinking back on your first time, I've always thought it would be something that is shared, no? I guess since I'm the only one losing it, I'm the only one that needs to know. I'm not sure, but I do know that theres something in the back of my head telling me I should let her know and I'm not sure why.

Whatever it may be you should deal with that instead of figuring out how to fix a bad situation that you create for yourself by inacting those beliefs. Focus on things that actually matter, you'll have more fun and won't need to worry about the white noise buzzing around in your head.

 

[naes]

Whatever it may be you should deal with that instead of figuring out how to fix a bad situation that you create for yourself by inacting those beliefs. Focus on things that actually matter, you'll have more fun and won't need to worry about the white noise buzzing around in your head.

So what should I do here, just wait until I can figure out the reason I'm thinking like this? What if I never really figure it out and constantly have this looming over my head?

 

[Francisco d'Anconia]

So what should I do here, just wait until I can figure out the reason I'm thinking like this? What if I never really figure it out and constantly have this looming over my head?

Once you realize that it's worth your while to figure it out, you will. If sarging women is more important to you with this weight on your back then you'll just keep sarging women; either way it's your call. One way will be easier but could hold you back, the other could be more difficult but it would remove the barrier. If you prefer taking the easier path just ask the forum what they'd do. You'll get more than enough answers to take the easier path and that should be more than enough justification.

 

[Vendetta081789]

If you really want to be with her on a long term relationship level. Her being your first or not, shouldn't hinder your relationship. It's really irrelevant. Hell, when I lost my virginity the girl KNEW it was my first time. I was bad...You'd be lucky if she doesn't already know.

 

[Latinoman]

So what should I do here, just wait until I can figure out the reason I'm thinking like this? What if I never really figure it out and constantly have this looming over my head?

Out of curiousity...how old are you? How old is she? How many you slept with? How many she slept with?

 

[drmeathead]

dont ask dont ask dont ask. dont tell dont tell dont tell. unless you have a kid or an uncurable STD you dont need to tell her ****. furthermore unless she has either, she dont need to tell you ****.

 

[naes]

Out of curiousity...how old are you? How old is she? How many you slept with? How many she slept with?

I'm 21, shes 20. I slept with 0 before her, she's slept with 16. Also, I've given her multiple orgasms and shes told me I'm good in bed.

 

[DonJuan11]

Why are you having a "relationship" with her? Is she worthy? Is she special? If yes, how so?

What you'll come to realize is that none of these girls are special - treat them as such!

Amen brother.