"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"

She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.

Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.

The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.

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Let's be honest, telling a chick she looks good? Good or Bad?

Bvbidd

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So you hear on this board complimenting a girl on her looks is good in moderation but all I have ever gotten were bad reactions.

You know, "Eww" or "Creepy!" or "You make me feel uncomfortable." ETC.

So does anybody else get similar reactions?
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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tony-montana

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i rarely do that. i don't like being one of those guys who suck up and tell a girl she's pretty when she already hears it from 50 other guys in a week. they already know they're hot. unless she's my girlfriend.
 

NeverFear

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no

NO. Not until she's your "woman". Trust me, dont go there.

If your'e a man's man, she will KNOW you're into her. Not in words. Deeds.

After awhile, if you're exclusively dating, THEN give her some compliments.

She will feel as if she's EARNED it by then.
 

Rex Man

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Depends. Give me an example of one of your 'compliment's'. Contrary to what these guys would have you believe, a well-timed, genuine compliement can give you an edge. Example please
 

"I just moved here from Florida."

That sentence contains at least five follow-up questions she WANTS you to ask. Where in Florida? What brought you here? How long have you been in the area? What do you miss? How does it compare to here?

She handed them to you on a silver platter. And you said, "Oh cool. I come here every week. I love this band. Ummm... pretty crowded tonight."

She smiled politely. Nodded. And never texted you back.

I was that guy for years. Talking too much. Listening too little. Panicking about my next sentence while she was literally feeding me the answers.

Then I found 22 rules that fixed the whole thing. Rule number one: shut up and listen. She'll tell you exactly what to say.

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hyperactive

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Someimes I freeze up and all I can think to say is complimentary. Some ladies dig it though. Last night I said something to a lady I barely know who was wearing fishnet stockings, "something about fish nets just does it for me." I think she liked that and can't see how it hindered me. But generic "You look good" 's are like cookie cutter pickup lines. Women are smart. They can tell when you're nervous and after them, spewing compliments.

Some women are of low self esteem, and complimenting them doesn't do any good either. It will take them years to get over their issues and no matter how much one compliments them they will never believe what they are hearing. These women might jump into bed with you if you treat them like **** though, looking for affirmation that her father never gave her or some other psych issue.

The real women are tough because they require intellectual challenge. And complimenting them will seem nothing other than jeuvenile so over all don't bother with cheap flattery. It's a good general rule with everyone. Don't want to come across as fake now do we?
 

PhatE1vis

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I think it works especially well, in moderation, on moderately attractive women.

Case in point - I'm friendly with one of my female co-workers. She's average looking and I'm not really attracted to her. But she's been looking pretty fit recently, so I made a comment - "You look different, have you been working out? You look fit." I just said it kind of off-hand as I was walking by her. She JUMPED out of her chair and followed me, face bright red, telling my about what she's been doing, yadda, yadda.

Well-timed, genuine compliments on the right girl can work.
 

Bvbidd

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That's weird.

Because when I tell moderatley attrative girls that very same thing, they go all

"Ewww, Stay way from me you make me feel weird."

What's the reason for this?
 

Interceptor

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I always say things like "You look gorgeous." or greet women I like "Hey gorgeous....you look great."

Never had a problem. I've always had a positive response.
 

rsaini

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is this a direct compliment on her looks?...i wanna get some opinions before I use it..

I spot a cute girl from a short range (she's just about to walk past me OR she's still n i'm about to walk past her):

Me(looking serious as if something's wrong): OMG...how did you do that?
her: do what??
ME: look so good...<smile>
her:<light chuckle or i dont know maybe a positive reaction>

What do you guys think?
 

"Why Women Dump the Guys Who Try the Hardest"

You paid for dinner. You drove. You said "whatever you want is fine" every single time. All the effort, no expectations.

And she left anyway — probably for a guy who makes her pick up the pizza.

Painful. Also predictable. Her mind quietly concludes that anything requiring zero effort from her is worth exactly zero. You became a free sample, and free samples get taken for granted.

The 22 Rules flip the dynamic. Small shifts that get her investing effort, money, and time in you — until SHE'S the one afraid of losing YOU.

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hyperactive

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I just worry that when I might start an interaction off with a full blown compliment like that it leaves no where else to go. Same as asking a woman her name immediately. Sure, tell that to a cougar and she will jump on you if she likes what she sees, but younger women don't seem to appreciate the direct approach as much, including blazing off the starting line with comments like "You're gorgeous..."
 

Interceptor

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hyperactive said:
I just worry that when I might start an interaction off with a full blown compliment like that it leaves no where else to go. Same as asking a woman her name immediately. Sure, tell that to a cougar and she will jump on you if she likes what she sees, but younger women don't seem to appreciate the direct approach as much, including blazing off the starting line with comments like "You're gorgeous..."

Huh??!
Where do you live?
Do they have women there????

Anyway, for the record, I don't approach women with "You're gorgeous." That sounds to me supplicating and puts her on the pedestal. I can compliment a woman directly. But there are certain rules that I don't break. I am never going to come across as "Oh WOW!!OMG! Like you are sooobeautiful and HAWT!! OMG!!"
Nope. Don't do that.



I did say "You look gorgeous." As in "You look gorgeous tonight."

I have said also "Hey, gorgeous." to strange women.


NEVER had ANY problems.

Anyway, just goes to show that what does not work for you , may work for me.
 

ElStud

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I go up to girls and tell them that rate them all the time and they were never bothered by it. I rate most of them 5's though.
 

hyperactive

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Interceptor said:
Huh??!
Where do you live?
Do they have women there????

You mean we're talking about women? Oh damn, sorry about that I thought I was on the message boards at gay.com.
 

Magma

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Interceptor said:
Anyway, just goes to show that what does not work for you , may work for me.
This man gets it. There are no absolutes. Period. One man cannot tell another man, "You can NEVER do this." Or, "You should ALWAYS do that." It doesn't work that way. Each of us is too unique (as well as the situation) to dispense that kind of advice. Besides, we have no idea about the context or tone with which the OP's compliments are delivered.

One thing I WILL say is that I, personally, never tell a gorgeous woman she is gorgeous simply for the sake of it. If she looks especially good one night, I'll tell her. If I like her shoes, I'll tell her that too. If her hair smells nice, I'll let her know. But to just say, "Wow, you look HOT!" is generally not a good idea. Something else must be going wrong (delivery, tone, context) for you to get such a negative response when you compliment a woman. Next time one of these b1tches responds this way, tell her to have some class and just say "Thank you" when someone compliments her for crissakes.
 

"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

Read more...

Interceptor

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hyperactive said:
You mean we're talking about women? Oh damn, sorry about that I thought I was on the message boards at gay.com.
Oh, that explains it now.
OK, I forgive you.


:crackup:
 

onthepath

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Bvbidd said:
So you hear on this board complimenting a girl on her looks is good in moderation but all I have ever gotten were bad reactions.

You know, "Eww" or "Creepy!" or "You make me feel uncomfortable." ETC.

So does anybody else get similar reactions?
if you're complimenting someone and getting a bad reaction, clearly you're doing something wrong.

"eww" or "creepy" suggests that your body language or your presentation, possibly your reputation are not that great. perhaps you try to play up the ****y/funny persona too much and youve gotten a reputation as being a jerk, so when you try to be nice, it seems out of character, and insincere (a massive change of character suggests an ulterior motive)

it's rare that girls will reject the copmliment (they may reject you for giving it, thinking you're just another average schmo who is just lusting after her and can't stimulate her mind).

so i guess you can do one of two things; change the way you act and behave or simply stop giving them
 

LegendBoy

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Depends a lot of compliments of any type is bad.

If you compliment an insecure girl it will work in your advantage(most girls are insecure).

A hot secure girl compliments or her looks will get you no where..
 

Francisco d'Anconia

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Bvbidd said:
That's weird.

Because when I tell moderatley attrative girls that very same thing, they go all

"Ewww, Stay way from me you make me feel weird."

What's the reason for this?
What exacty do you say?
 

moto

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how about this pick up line?
its a good way to get her attention but it does compliment her. Is complimenting good in this line? anyone tried something of this sort

"excuse me..um, do i know you?"

"no"

"well my name is david. i apologize, i thought you were one of my friends. she's pretty, but you're beyond gorgeous...." then talk talk talk =)
 

"She Laughed All Night. Then She Ghosted You. Here's Why."

Dinner ran three hours. She laughed at everything. You walked her to her car thinking this one's locked in.

Then: nothing. Two texts. No reply. What happened?

You did what most men do on a great date. You filled every silence, answered every question, and left her with nothing to wonder about. No mystery. Nothing to sit with when she got home.

Rule 3 of the "22 Rules" changes the ending: tell her a little, hold back the rest, and let her imagination do the chasing. The ghosting stops too.

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