"She Made Her Decision Before You Finished Your Sentence"

Three seconds. That's how long it took. Your shoes. Your posture. The way you held your drink. Whether you looked at the floor or looked at her.

She already filed you away. Interesting. Boring. Safe. Bold. Before you even opened your mouth.

Everything you say after that is just her confirming what she already decided.

So stop rehearsing lines. Fix the first three seconds. Stand tall. Look up. Smile like you mean it. Walk like you belong wherever you're standing.

The words come later. The impression comes first.

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Let my relationship go too far. Stayed for selfish reasons, how to get out?

smithersonb11

Don Juan
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Hey guys,

So around summer last year, I started to have oneitis for a girl I had friendzoned. Decided to try things out. Regular sex and a regular relationship was nice for a while. She got hit on a lot, being pretty cute, I got jealous but not nearly as jealous as she did. Now It's almost like I'm staying with her not because I want to be with her, but because I don't want someone else to have her.

Almost a year later, and it's a pretty serious relationship. I'm moving far away to school in september, she wants to come, actually, she thinks she is. She's pretty much my ideal girlfriend in almost every way, but I'm young, there's no ****ing way im settling down for "the one" this early in life. It will absolutely destroy her if I break up with her, won't be easy for me either. I've been looking for a way out or hoping she'd do something to give me a way out but it just hasn't happened.

I feel like **** for letting it go this far.
 

"She's Out of Your League"

You've said it a hundred times. Maybe a thousand. And every time you say it, you train your brain to freeze the next time she walks into the room.

Leagues are a myth invented by guys who are scared of women.

She's a person. She has bad breath in the morning. She picks songs she can't sing in the shower. She overthinks her own texts.

Walk over. Say something. The league dissolves the second you open your mouth.

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apocolipto

Senior Don Juan
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Why not let her go with you? Then you could enjoy time together.

It's really not to say your going to get engaged just 'cause she's going with you.
 

LearningSlowly

Master Don Juan
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Don't let her go with you. You need a mature girl who sees things realistically and doesn't want to leech.

Be honest and firm.
 

Vidrio

Senior Don Juan
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Just tell her straight up. She'll probably start crying and trying to get you to change your mind, but don't change it.
 

smithersonb11

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apocolipto said:
Why not let her go with you? Then you could enjoy time together.

It's really not to say your going to get engaged just 'cause she's going with you.
Thought about it, not sure I want to potentially mess up or delay her future just so I can put off breaking up with her for a few more months or however long.

LearningSlowly said:
Don't let her go with you. You need a mature girl who sees things realistically and doesn't want to leech.

Be honest and firm.
You're definitely right, easier said than done though...
 

"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"

Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.

You've been "getting ready" for two years.

She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.

Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.

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