Leading girls on

[Comatozed]

Do you guys do it?

I'm pretty new to all this dating stuff, and I am now in a situation where, for the first time ever, it feels like i'm leading this girl on. We're only dating, but it seems like she's way more into it than me.

Which is funny because I thought that was the situation I was wanting, and now it's here it doesn't feel good.

Part of me wants to keep it going 1) Whilst I decide more and 2) For relationship experience/practise.. but then again i'm not sure how much use it'd be 'practising' with a girl i don't particularly care for, compared to when I'm in a relationship with one I do.

I also might be being too blue pill. Does it get easier to let girls down after you've done it a bit? At present, whenever I think blue pill, I remind myself how my oneitus made me feel when she ended it..but being cold to other girls as a result of what was my poor game is a harsh.

Toughen up?

 

[Tictac]

You can't lead her anywhere that she doesn't want to go.

 

[TheCWord]

Always be honest. You can't feel bad about being honest and they'll respect you for your honesty, even if they briefly hate you first.

This applies when you want to start or end things with this girl. So, as early as possible, once you know you don't want anything long term with this girl but can tell she does, just tell her you're enjoying your time together and you hope she's cool with things the way they are, because you're really not looking for anything more at the moment. She might play it off like she's totally cool with that and then come back at you weeks or months later when she's upset that things haven't progressed, but you can't be guilty because you were upfront with her. She doesn't have the right to feel led on if you at some point have told her that it's not going anywhere.

Then when it comes time to end the dating relationship, you just say it's been great but you feel like she wants something different from you and that it wouldn't be right to continue on like this. She'll be pissed, but later appreciate your honesty.

I've experienced both situations many times. Most recently, a girl was super gung ho for an LTR right out the gate. I told her flat out I didn't want that. A conversation had to be had, but she eventually accepted the reality of the situation and we were able to bang and enjoy each other's company even more than before because everyone's cards were in the table.

In an instance where I had to break things off with a girl, she slammed down the phone and was all pissed. I bumped into her months later at a party and when we saw each other, you could tell she wasn't sure how to handle it and was preparing for awkwardness. I cut through it by going right in for a hug, she was glowing - so happy to see me and telling me how I'm a great guy. There was no interest on her part or mine, but there was a respect between us because I tried to keep things as honest as possible.

 

[Comatozed]

Great posts.

Do I need to almost stop her investing too much then? She wants to cook dinner and pay to take me out :/