TooColdUlrick
Master Don Juan
^^^whatever, you're a joke. the only perspective that you bring to these boards is how irrational women are.
"So, What Do You Do for Fun?"
She asks it casually, mid-sip. And you feel the floor open up, because the honest answer is work, gym, and a couple shows you're half-watching.
Women rarely say this out loud, but a man with a life is attractive before he says a word. The guy who spent Saturday deep-sea fishing and came back with photos and a story — he walks in already interesting.
The "22 Rules" pushed me to build a life worth talking about. Turns out the fastest way to be interesting to women is to be interested in your own life first.
LD-LTR take plunge?
- Thread starter MacAvoy
- Start date
- Status
"She Wants a Man, Not a Boy"
You asked her if she wanted to grab coffee. Then you asked if the time worked. Then you asked if the place was okay. Then you asked if she'd prefer tea.
Four questions. Four chances for her to say no. Four signals that you're terrified of making a decision.
Plan it. Pick the place. Pick the time. Tell her where to meet you. She'll either show up or she won't.
Either way, you look like a man instead of a scared little boy.
TooColdUlrick said:
"Whatever" is something teenage girls say when they can't think of anything logical or rational to say. You really shouldn't try to claim that I am irrational when it's you who are behaving that way. :crackup:
MacAvoy
Banned
TooColdUlrick said:
Wyld I hate to point it out but if you comprehended what he said, he said men can subordinate their feelings better than women implying that they can better direct or control their emotional feelings. He did not say that can deal with them better. There is a BIG difference between the two.Wyldfire said:
I'm sorry to say Wyld but your the one who's hijacked this thread. You know most people in the Mature MAN forum don't value your opinion because your a women, that being said, you should have the maturity to avoid getting drawn into flame wars. Your last 2 posts have added NOTHING to the topic of the thread, it was merely a pissing contest.Wyldfire said:
Now if there is anything else on the topic it would be appreciated.
Re:
On Men's Feelings.
As a man, with some feelings, I feel qualified to offer my comments. Many are MORE impartial with their observation OF feelings. We stand back a bit farther than women from the immediate situation. Whereas almost ANYTHING can prick a woman's feelings; it's how she navigates life.
For instance, a man will observe if what he's FEELING is true or not, if there's anything he can immediately solve, or just chock it up to life's bumps. It's simply (2) different experiences, neither good nor bad. The converging of lives enable one another to learn, to improve communications, and to improve quality of life.
But I don't think it's true men bottle feelings up. They only do that when they don't handle the situation, and instead, STUFF it way down inside, which some men do, when they don't put to rest what is it they first became upset about.
For instance, I could be rattled about work, but then I have to observe WHY I am feeling that, exam what can and can't be done, and if nothing, I move on. I don't dwell. I don't need to talk. I can't solve it, so why rattle someone elses emotions on it, if I can't control or change it?
It's like people's opinions. Women are obviously more easily influenced by what the public thinks about them, whether the public consists of friends, family, potential lovers, lovers, X's, etc. They'll dress to impress, they're more into proper etiquette, into proper decor and manners, into keeping appearances, saving face (normally), than a Man is. A man does not wholly care about opinions, since he realizes there's only SO much he can to manipulate them. And when he tries to manipulate ONE segment, he often alienates another segment, so it's rarely win-win. Eventually you realize you're a play thing of the public, and get tired of the bouncing around, and just quit trying to please people, and you're just direct, honest, and truthful.
Here I am, THIS is me, like it or not!
On the Long Distance Relationship
I feel qualified here, because I had a GF (sort of) from Boston to Texas (San Antonio). Wasn't bad. I was single at the time, had extra cash to blow, was young, dum, and full of cumm. People would ask, if you can get a girl THERE, why not here??
Because I liked her. Simple enough. I wanted to. I didn't need a REASON, otherwise I could easily CHANGE that reason. When you have a REASON, someone will try to talk you out of it. But for me, it was like going on vacations with a Friend with benefits. She'd pay to see me, I'd pay to see her, and so on. It was fun.
But it couldn't last. Women need the presence emotionally of a man. They need to come to him, see him, feel his presence; she can't subsist on fleeting relationships, on hotel sex, and on letters forever. So it ended.
We'd (I'd) pondered moving. Professionally I was able to do so. Personally, I had my family here. Financially, it would be cheaper. And I felt confident I could start over and enjoy it, like I would be able to anywhere else.
THE BOTTOM LINE????
YOU'RE RESOLVE TO MAKE IT WORK! That's it. And by posting here, I realize you're getting input as to what has happened to others, but if you're questioning it, YOU"RE DEAD. It's like Top Gun, the minute you think, you're Dead. You can't. Especially with such big decisions. Hesitation kills.
If you want something, do it, and see it through. But if you go with certain expectations, they'll either be filled or not, more likely they won't be, and you'll be upset, pissed, and resentful. What then? Move home? Ok.
Personally, if I'd gone to TX I saw lots of benies to it. The temperature, year round golf, easier access to Pro Football games, and cheaper, more bars, hotter chicks than the northeast, sunshine, bigger state, new state, cheaper real estate. I figured I'd make it work whether it failed or not with the girl. And in the end, we'd probably remain as friends, and I could be with her other friends.
A guy with the CAN Do mentality will be ok, and eventually, if he's dumped by the girl he moves for, will end up banging her friends in a year anyways, because they'll see she was dumb for dumping a guy who can get along NO MATTER what.
That's my 2 cents.
A-Unit
On Men's Feelings.
As a man, with some feelings, I feel qualified to offer my comments. Many are MORE impartial with their observation OF feelings. We stand back a bit farther than women from the immediate situation. Whereas almost ANYTHING can prick a woman's feelings; it's how she navigates life.
For instance, a man will observe if what he's FEELING is true or not, if there's anything he can immediately solve, or just chock it up to life's bumps. It's simply (2) different experiences, neither good nor bad. The converging of lives enable one another to learn, to improve communications, and to improve quality of life.
But I don't think it's true men bottle feelings up. They only do that when they don't handle the situation, and instead, STUFF it way down inside, which some men do, when they don't put to rest what is it they first became upset about.
For instance, I could be rattled about work, but then I have to observe WHY I am feeling that, exam what can and can't be done, and if nothing, I move on. I don't dwell. I don't need to talk. I can't solve it, so why rattle someone elses emotions on it, if I can't control or change it?
It's like people's opinions. Women are obviously more easily influenced by what the public thinks about them, whether the public consists of friends, family, potential lovers, lovers, X's, etc. They'll dress to impress, they're more into proper etiquette, into proper decor and manners, into keeping appearances, saving face (normally), than a Man is. A man does not wholly care about opinions, since he realizes there's only SO much he can to manipulate them. And when he tries to manipulate ONE segment, he often alienates another segment, so it's rarely win-win. Eventually you realize you're a play thing of the public, and get tired of the bouncing around, and just quit trying to please people, and you're just direct, honest, and truthful.
Here I am, THIS is me, like it or not!
On the Long Distance Relationship
I feel qualified here, because I had a GF (sort of) from Boston to Texas (San Antonio). Wasn't bad. I was single at the time, had extra cash to blow, was young, dum, and full of cumm. People would ask, if you can get a girl THERE, why not here??
Because I liked her. Simple enough. I wanted to. I didn't need a REASON, otherwise I could easily CHANGE that reason. When you have a REASON, someone will try to talk you out of it. But for me, it was like going on vacations with a Friend with benefits. She'd pay to see me, I'd pay to see her, and so on. It was fun.
But it couldn't last. Women need the presence emotionally of a man. They need to come to him, see him, feel his presence; she can't subsist on fleeting relationships, on hotel sex, and on letters forever. So it ended.
We'd (I'd) pondered moving. Professionally I was able to do so. Personally, I had my family here. Financially, it would be cheaper. And I felt confident I could start over and enjoy it, like I would be able to anywhere else.
THE BOTTOM LINE????
YOU'RE RESOLVE TO MAKE IT WORK! That's it. And by posting here, I realize you're getting input as to what has happened to others, but if you're questioning it, YOU"RE DEAD. It's like Top Gun, the minute you think, you're Dead. You can't. Especially with such big decisions. Hesitation kills.
If you want something, do it, and see it through. But if you go with certain expectations, they'll either be filled or not, more likely they won't be, and you'll be upset, pissed, and resentful. What then? Move home? Ok.
Personally, if I'd gone to TX I saw lots of benies to it. The temperature, year round golf, easier access to Pro Football games, and cheaper, more bars, hotter chicks than the northeast, sunshine, bigger state, new state, cheaper real estate. I figured I'd make it work whether it failed or not with the girl. And in the end, we'd probably remain as friends, and I could be with her other friends.
A guy with the CAN Do mentality will be ok, and eventually, if he's dumped by the girl he moves for, will end up banging her friends in a year anyways, because they'll see she was dumb for dumping a guy who can get along NO MATTER what.
That's my 2 cents.
A-Unit
"You'll Never Feel READY to Walk Over"
Next Monday you'll feel more confident. After the gym you'll feel more confident. After one more drink you'll feel more confident. After you get a better haircut, a better jacket, a better job.
You've been "getting ready" for two years.
She's standing ten feet away right now. She'll be gone in four minutes. No amount of preparation will manufacture the courage that only comes from moving your feet.
Walk over. Stumble through the first sentence. Let it be clumsy. Let it be imperfect. You will feel more alive in those ten seconds than you have all month.
Re:
On Men's Feelings.
As a man, with some feelings, I feel qualified to offer my comments. Many are MORE impartial with their observation OF feelings. We stand back a bit farther than women from the immediate situation. Whereas almost ANYTHING can prick a woman's feelings; it's how she navigates life.
For instance, a man will observe if what he's FEELING is true or not, if there's anything he can immediately solve, or just chock it up to life's bumps. It's simply (2) different experiences, neither good nor bad. The converging of lives enable one another to learn, to improve communications, and to improve quality of life.
But I don't think it's true men bottle feelings up. They only do that when they don't handle the situation, and instead, STUFF it way down inside, which some men do, when they don't put to rest what is it they first became upset about.
For instance, I could be rattled about work, but then I have to observe WHY I am feeling that, exam what can and can't be done, and if nothing, I move on. I don't dwell. I don't need to talk. I can't solve it, so why rattle someone elses emotions on it, if I can't control or change it?
It's like people's opinions. Women are obviously more easily influenced by what the public thinks about them, whether the public consists of friends, family, potential lovers, lovers, X's, etc. They'll dress to impress, they're more into proper etiquette, into proper decor and manners, into keeping appearances, saving face (normally), than a Man is. A man does not wholly care about opinions, since he realizes there's only SO much he can to manipulate them. And when he tries to manipulate ONE segment, he often alienates another segment, so it's rarely win-win. Eventually you realize you're a play thing of the public, and get tired of the bouncing around, and just quit trying to please people, and you're just direct, honest, and truthful.
Here I am, THIS is me, like it or not!
On the Long Distance Relationship
I feel qualified here, because I had a GF (sort of) from Boston to Texas (San Antonio). Wasn't bad. I was single at the time, had extra cash to blow, was young, dum, and full of cumm. People would ask, if you can get a girl THERE, why not here??
Because I liked her. Simple enough. I wanted to. I didn't need a REASON, otherwise I could easily CHANGE that reason. When you have a REASON, someone will try to talk you out of it. But for me, it was like going on vacations with a Friend with benefits. She'd pay to see me, I'd pay to see her, and so on. It was fun.
But it couldn't last. Women need the presence emotionally of a man. They need to come to him, see him, feel his presence; she can't subsist on fleeting relationships, on hotel sex, and on letters forever. So it ended.
We'd (I'd) pondered moving. Professionally I was able to do so. Personally, I had my family here. Financially, it would be cheaper. And I felt confident I could start over and enjoy it, like I would be able to anywhere else.
THE BOTTOM LINE????
YOU'RE RESOLVE TO MAKE IT WORK! That's it. And by posting here, I realize you're getting input as to what has happened to others, but if you're questioning it, YOU"RE DEAD. It's like Top Gun, the minute you think, you're Dead. You can't. Especially with such big decisions. Hesitation kills.
If you want something, do it, and see it through. But if you go with certain expectations, they'll either be filled or not, more likely they won't be, and you'll be upset, pissed, and resentful. What then? Move home? Ok.
Personally, if I'd gone to TX I saw lots of benies to it. The temperature, year round golf, easier access to Pro Football games, and cheaper, more bars, hotter chicks than the northeast, sunshine, bigger state, new state, cheaper real estate. I figured I'd make it work whether it failed or not with the girl. And in the end, we'd probably remain as friends, and I could be with her other friends.
A guy with the CAN Do mentality will be ok, and eventually, if he's dumped by the girl he moves for, will end up banging her friends in a year anyways, because they'll see she was dumb for dumping a guy who can get along NO MATTER what.
That's my 2 cents.
A-Unit
On Men's Feelings.
As a man, with some feelings, I feel qualified to offer my comments. Many are MORE impartial with their observation OF feelings. We stand back a bit farther than women from the immediate situation. Whereas almost ANYTHING can prick a woman's feelings; it's how she navigates life.
For instance, a man will observe if what he's FEELING is true or not, if there's anything he can immediately solve, or just chock it up to life's bumps. It's simply (2) different experiences, neither good nor bad. The converging of lives enable one another to learn, to improve communications, and to improve quality of life.
But I don't think it's true men bottle feelings up. They only do that when they don't handle the situation, and instead, STUFF it way down inside, which some men do, when they don't put to rest what is it they first became upset about.
For instance, I could be rattled about work, but then I have to observe WHY I am feeling that, exam what can and can't be done, and if nothing, I move on. I don't dwell. I don't need to talk. I can't solve it, so why rattle someone elses emotions on it, if I can't control or change it?
It's like people's opinions. Women are obviously more easily influenced by what the public thinks about them, whether the public consists of friends, family, potential lovers, lovers, X's, etc. They'll dress to impress, they're more into proper etiquette, into proper decor and manners, into keeping appearances, saving face (normally), than a Man is. A man does not wholly care about opinions, since he realizes there's only SO much he can to manipulate them. And when he tries to manipulate ONE segment, he often alienates another segment, so it's rarely win-win. Eventually you realize you're a play thing of the public, and get tired of the bouncing around, and just quit trying to please people, and you're just direct, honest, and truthful.
Here I am, THIS is me, like it or not!
On the Long Distance Relationship
I feel qualified here, because I had a GF (sort of) from Boston to Texas (San Antonio). Wasn't bad. I was single at the time, had extra cash to blow, was young, dum, and full of cumm. People would ask, if you can get a girl THERE, why not here??
Because I liked her. Simple enough. I wanted to. I didn't need a REASON, otherwise I could easily CHANGE that reason. When you have a REASON, someone will try to talk you out of it. But for me, it was like going on vacations with a Friend with benefits. She'd pay to see me, I'd pay to see her, and so on. It was fun.
But it couldn't last. Women need the presence emotionally of a man. They need to come to him, see him, feel his presence; she can't subsist on fleeting relationships, on hotel sex, and on letters forever. So it ended.
We'd (I'd) pondered moving. Professionally I was able to do so. Personally, I had my family here. Financially, it would be cheaper. And I felt confident I could start over and enjoy it, like I would be able to anywhere else.
THE BOTTOM LINE????
YOU'RE RESOLVE TO MAKE IT WORK! That's it. And by posting here, I realize you're getting input as to what has happened to others, but if you're questioning it, YOU"RE DEAD. It's like Top Gun, the minute you think, you're Dead. You can't. Especially with such big decisions. Hesitation kills.
If you want something, do it, and see it through. But if you go with certain expectations, they'll either be filled or not, more likely they won't be, and you'll be upset, pissed, and resentful. What then? Move home? Ok.
Personally, if I'd gone to TX I saw lots of benies to it. The temperature, year round golf, easier access to Pro Football games, and cheaper, more bars, hotter chicks than the northeast, sunshine, bigger state, new state, cheaper real estate. I figured I'd make it work whether it failed or not with the girl. And in the end, we'd probably remain as friends, and I could be with her other friends.
A guy with the CAN Do mentality will be ok, and eventually, if he's dumped by the girl he moves for, will end up banging her friends in a year anyways, because they'll see she was dumb for dumping a guy who can get along NO MATTER what.
That's my 2 cents.
A-Unit
MacAvoy said:
Control and deal with is basically the same thing.
My initial post was on topic. Who attacked who? I will NOT sit back and allow anyone to attack me at will on this forum or anywhere. Everyone knows this and it's not going to change. Therefore...if the "mature" men on this forum don't want me to argue they might want to consider showing some common courtesy rather than their ass.
Now...I have to ask this...why are you pointing your finger at me while giving the two who STARTED the "pissing contest" a pass? That doesn't fly with me. I show the same level of respect to people that those individuals show to me. You get what you give. If you want me to respect your request then you had ought to spread your chastising around more equally.
That is all.
A-Unit...there are far more men who stuff their feelings than there are who don't. In fact, in my 40 years, I can't count the men who actually process their feelings in a healthy way on one hand and still have fingers left over. I attribute this to society and the messages sent to men. At a very young age, boys are given the message that "big boys don't cry" and the like. When a man gets his feelings hurt badly he's typically a train wreck of self destruction. When a woman gets her feelings hurt badly she cries it out, perhaps eats some chocolate or ice cream and then moves on. Men, in general, just don't process negative feelings very productively. Again, it's just how they are and because they've been raised that way. If you do process your feelings in a healthy way you're very fortunate, because in my experience, you are not the norm.
- Status