Lacking conversation skills! (help me)

[phatboi408]

I havnt been on lately to let you guys know that I have been busy and just take some time to focuse on school.

I am so shy and lack conversation skills! Ok but since I started looking at suave I had breaken out of my shell more, but I dont want that I want to destroy it an not be shy.

To let you guys now I was really shy in elementry but later grew out some of it in highschool, but its the problem that made me not get girls.

I even had a girl who sets next to me and says "Talk to me." but I dint because I was shy because I really dont have anything to talk about, I dont have basic conversation skills and people do say that Im quiet and when I'm in a group, I dont even talk. Thats because I dont know what to talk about? I lack conversation skills.

That same girls also said thats why I dont have a girlfriend because I dont talk much, which is true. I had a girl totally liking me but do to my shyness or lacking conversation I never had anything going. My friends also said that too.

So I need to break out of my shell!!! I have gone far since suave, but not far enough. I have met some new friends this year but a cant actully stay in a group or person and have a long conversation.

O yeah I also mumble alot, and people would be "what did you say" I guess Im afraid of what they will think of what Im saying or just I dont know I have been doing it for a bit and It has gone away a bit but not to where I dont mumble.

I just lack conversation skills



Please help and give me sugestions.

 

[oakraiderz2]

You can talk about...life, music, schools, what they did that day, how their day is, where they work, what YOURE intersted in, how you think some girl has a fat ass and titties sh*t like that. THEN use those listening skills youve worked on and focus on what the other person says.

 

[Docs]

Docs - Newbie Tips to Conversation Starting and Maintaining.

Self written article.

 

[IronRice]

You can usually open up the conversation by asking How are you or Whats up or something..They'll give an answer and you work with what they give you, ya know?


Okay.. Now say you started talkin to this girl.. and you say "What's up?" and she answers with "Ohh Nothing. Basically School." What does that open for you?? A topic.. School. Maybe kind of a lame topic but its out there.. In some cases, You get a girl that will answer your question with "Nothing.".. and thats it.. Thats when you can either play around with her or you can bring things up..

Just stay cool man. Open your mouth when needed.. Start talkin to people man... because the quicker you do it the faster you will get over bein shy.

 

[JH6]

just keep asking questions and elaborate on what she is saying.

 

[phatboi408]

Thanks, Ill start of small like "whats up" and "hows your weekend" to both guys and girls because some people like me dont even have basic conversation skills and so ill start doing that untill I can stay in for longer conversations.

It seems like I can talk about anything and Ill put neg hits later on for girls and Ill know Ill get better at conversation skills but it just take practice and to break out of my shell or destriy it because I broke out of some of my shell last year and this year but it's the whole what I should do after hey whats up.

Thanks

Ill keep you guys uptated.

 

[B-Lemond]

The DJ Bible has a whole section on Conversation.

 

[phatboi408]

Yeah I havnt been on or doing anything for a while because of school and i totally forgot that pretty much all I have to do is look it up.

 

[B-Lemond]

Originally posted by phatboi408
Yeah I havnt been on or doing anything for a while because of school and i totally forgot that pretty much all I have to do is look it up.

 

[phatboi408]

I havnt been on this site because lately and just been really focuse on school and now I am restarting so I can get things going for me.

 

[Vulture]

Originally posted by phatboi408
I havnt been on this site because lately and just been really focuse on school and now I am restarting so I can get things going for me.

You obviously havn't been putting too much effort into school with all those grammar mistakes of yours.

:crackup:

 

[phatboi408]

Yh i hvnt bn ptng a lt of efrt n skl. LOL

 

[JayCamx23]

go with the flow...why do so many don juanabees worry so much about, "omg, like, i dont know what to say, like, i want her so bad and like, i love her, so what do i say." no offense but STOP WORRYING SO MUCH!!! ive gone through this "what do i say?" stage before. the answer is DONT WORRY. nowadays i rarely PLAN what im going to say to girls. I do sometimes before i go to bed, but i never fall asleep uneasy because of it. The way i go about it is to just be happy around girls. next time your talking to a chick dont be afraid to screw up and ENJOY talking to her. dont take any ****. if you dont like the way the convo is going. well then god damnit change it to something youd like to discuss.

Another thing i enjoy doing is observing real don juans. i love it. theres this natural in one of my classes. im not a big fan of him, but i love watching the way he is around girls. hes funny, fairly good looking, confident, doesnt give a fvck about what others think, applies kino to chicks, hes a sophomore and has freshman, sophomore, and junior girls after him. hes not needy, and doesnt take **** from girls. one girl who was recently going out with him fvcked some senior. he broke up with her right away and within no time had another chick. now shes wants him back soo bad. well, can you blame him. i would never take that from a girl ever. i love watchin how he treats chicks. my advice is try to get involved or associated with a natural and observe him. me, im lucky to be in a few of this dudes classes

 

[JayUK]

I always find a good subject is the tv show 'LOST' ask her if she watches it, if she dont, then u can tell her what it is, if she has, then talk to her about it, say how ud love to be stuck on a deserted island and then start askin her random stuff like if she cud jus take 1 thing to an island wat wud it be, then be jus ded random an keep the talk flowin 'oh yeah, that actors awesome, u seen him in lord of the rings?' then u can talk about lord of the rings or anythin! jus go for it man!

 

[Holland]

Well, the most basic and easy thing to do is:

Ask the person you're talking to if she did something fun past week/weekend?
If the person doesn't know anything to say, you know he/she is probably boring and not interesting to talk to.
It's likely the person will return the answer to you, so you can tell them what you've been upto and any fun experiences you had lately. This always leads to other things to talk about.

If you don't have anything to tell them? Well, then you need to work on that too.

Can't get any more basic then that...

 

[oakraiderz2]

Originally posted by Vulture
You obviously havn't been putting too much effort into school with all those grammar mistakes of yours.

:crackup:

Hahaha...nice

 

[Phat]

Your problem is. You think your lacking conversation skills. But you will never know how to talk untill you actually start taking the action to talk and have real life conversations. Trust me i use to think the same thing. Now i can talk to girls for hours with out ****in anything it.. all it takes is practice.

 

[DJ4Real]

You don't lack conversation skills...you lack confidence.

Build up your confidence.

 

[tenzo]

well I got this tip from juggler which I read from style's book "the game". Basically he says that the best way to communicate and keep conversations is talking in statements form; it gives the idea that you're confident and giving, which is basically the idea you want to project, and by the way this is the way old friends talk with each other.

so for ex. instead of asking her where does she live, you could just say a statement such as "I'm from Kuwait, where our Emir just died today!", if she's interested in talking to you; she'll branch and comment on your statement!

again, credits goes to Juggler.

Regards,

 

[ICaughtFire]

to have good conversations, first of all you need to ENJOY conversations. You can never do well on the things you dont like, which is awfully true. That's why playboys are so good with picking girls up, they ENJOY the process of hooking up with girls, unlike most guys which is scared of it like hell.

if you dont like talking at all, you can't learn to have good convo.