Lack of success at the club?

[green69]

I recently turned 19, so I've been going to the clubs recently. I've been maybe 2-3 times total.

Anyways, I haven't really gotten any success at the club. I just wanna dance with some girls, have a good time...and whatever happens, happens.

I would consider myself a fairly attractive guy, a good number of girls have said I am "soooooo cute" and such. But I probably couldn't even get a girl a dance with a girl (outside of friends) if my life depended on it. Ok I'm not the GREATEST dancer, but I go out there and have fun and I'm not bad by any means. I've read all of the clubbing posts in the Bible, but so far no luck.

I'm not trying to whine with this post, I'm just trying to pin-point the reason for my lack of success and want to learn how to improve. Maybe my approach is wrong? I find it really hard to find a girl dancing on her own so it's hard to find someone. Should I say hi to the girls in groups who are sitting around the dance floor? Or maybe the fact that most people say I look like I'm 17, and I have that 'nice guy look' is hurting me a little bit. Any suggestions would help, I'm trying to learn as much as I can so I can have a better time in the future. Thanks.

 

[G-Man UK]

Yeah check the Shezzlers guide it's really good.

How old you look can sometimes be a factor as some women like to go out with older guy's. I would'nt let this enter your 'mindset' though because if you exude a high level of confidence by all the positives going for you this will have the effect of making you look older.

Good Luck!

 

[ocbeachbum]

I also love the clubbing and pretty much all my success comes from there. Heres a few tips that helped me get the club hook ups so far

Before you leave your house:
1. Smell good. Buy something good. No Axe or tag. No designer ostors. Buy Aqua Di Gio, Chrome, or Curve. They are chick magnets. Before you put your club clothes on. Put some around your neck, chest, back, and wrists. Then once the clothes are on put a little dab on your chest, wrists, and neck again. Girls will remember that awesome smell.
2. Good style- Me and my friend usually get a ton of girls. This one girl told us its because we are different. Dont try to be like all those other metrosexuals out there. Have your own style but be current.

At the club:
1. Use alcohol to your advantage: At first, alcohol gave me an excuse to do things I never would do sober like dancing, talking to girls, acting crazy. Now its a way of life. If you dont drink stay away from clubs.
2. Dance..good: I sucked at first too. Here are some hints. Watch MTV and see how the guys dance in videos and what not. Watch other guys at the club. The hardest part is dancing with a girl but use alcohol once again to your advantage until you get it. Once you master grinding with a girl, your in. Girls think good dancers=good lovers.
3. Dance with every girl: Its just dancing. I dance with girls of every color, shape, and size. Ugly or pretty. Trust me girls will notice how much fun your having and want in on the action.
4. Dont spend too much time with one girl: If your having fun and things are going well. have maybe 2-3 dances and move on. Tell her, hey before you leave Id like another dance but I need to go hang with my boys for a little bit. If she wants you. She will come find you again.

Hope that helps

 

[green69]

Thanks for your replies guys. I think I'm doing the best job I can in terms of preparation, at the moment. I dress nice, I have a few drinks before the club and buy a few after I'm in, I wear a little bit of cologne - although I will follow your advice on the cologne obeachbum.

I'm no slouch with girls. I'm not a ladies man either. I can carry a good conversation, I can make a girl laugh but I'm not very good at the pickup scene, yet. I've never done a cold approach before, and not even one at a club/bar yet. Only with girls in a class with me, or if some situation happens where I have an excuse to talk with a girl I'll take the opportunity.

I guess I need the most work on the approach. Especially in the club, the girls are in small groups of 3-4 people, and I'm not really sure how to go about going up and talking to a girl. If she was by herself, and I got some good eye contact with her it would be a lot easier. But the reality is all the girls are in groups, or with another girl friend. Coming up to a girl who's in a group chatting with all of her friends seems a lot more challenging and difficult for me. I guess this would probably be a lot easier with a wingman, eh? I don't know, I would really like to fly solo if possible I just don't feel comfortable talking in groups I prefer talking to girls on my own. Any ideas?

As for The Shezzler, I agree my young look might be a downside at this age...but then again I've been hit on by girls in their early 20's. So although it's a downside, to blame my failures on my young look would be a lame excuse. You're right, as long as I am confident I shouldn't have to worry about that...and for the most part I haven't let it get to me that much. I'm also only 5'9''...so height is a small factor but again I try not to make an issue out of it.

 

[Mr. Mystery II]

First focus on having fun. Don't go there with the sole purpose of getting women, because if you get dissed a few times you will feel like sh!t and no one will want anything to do with you.

So, focus on being friendly and flirty.

When you get a girl to dance or have a drink with you, focus first on fun then move onto being more sexual later on, with a hint of fun. When have playfully touched her everywhere you really want to, then you can start to get more sexual.

Key: don't be too aggressive, or you'll scare her. You shift gears, and let her step on the gas.

Mr. Mystery