Kiss Bypass?

[Juando]

Quick question if any of you have encountered this behavioral quirk:

cute girl I've dated a few times, shy, very shy at first, had to kino
escalate very slowly, methodically. Made steady progress, to the point
where I can put my hands just about anywhere I want on her.

I have not F*closed yet, partly because I've not been able to do any passionate kissing, which is what I'm used to, and then on from there.

I even asked her, if she likes to kiss and she gave me an offhanded yes, but now I'm thinking it's either,

1. She's just not into kissing so fukk it and just go for the prize and skip the mouth to mouth.

2. (blow to my ego) Maybe I've met the first chick in my life that I did not know how to manouvre smoothly to kiss close, in which case, HELP! I'm pathetic.

I kiss her around the head, neck, cheeks, etc. and she is ok with that but does not really arouse her. What seems to melt her is fondling which I do and has gotten to a critical point.

Any ideas? Go for it as is or am I missing something??

(It's not me: I've never had this problem, and no jokes about breath 'cause that's not it)

 

[Interceptor]

Start by kissing her neck , ears, and cheek and then gently touch her face and turn it to your lips. Add a little buit of the nape of the neck stroking into her hairline too.


have a soft touch, man. Dont force it.

If she turns AWAY in THAT instance, you've got to freeze out.
Because of the overt rejection of intimacy.
She will see your reaction, and know this was not a good move on her part.

She is saying "NO! I don't wan to kiss you!"

Dude..what more signal do you want?




Be cool ,but don't get too warm. This woman is having difficulty being physically intimate.
Is this really a woman you want to spend your resources on?
I know it's tough.
But if you're still pursuing other women, then don't let this actually 'bother' you.


She seems to want pleasure, but NOT intimacy with you.

What do you want?

Intimacy and sexual pleasure?
You may not get either with this one.

Remember that a lot of women who have ONS do NOT kiss men. And of course you know that it is MO of prostitutes not to ever kiss their customer, due to the intimate nature.

Anywa, these are just some assumptions based on a little bit of info you provided. Mayeb there;s more to the story?
Has she been abused?
Abusive BF or something?
Were you too 'try hard' in the beginnning?
Were you coming on too strong in the beginning?
just some things to think about.
And yes, get rid of that damn thing called EGO!

 

[Juando]

Really good stuff and food for thought, Interceptor.

I don't think she has trauma in her past. She is young, 27 and shy.
27 is not so young for us (sexually) but she is from a much more conservative culture.

The level of intimacy between us, short of sex, is definitely escalating, as well as trust, so part of me just wants to be patient and see how this turns out.

As I've posted before, even though I struggle with situations like this I do like challenges, so they seem to find their way to me. Challenge and mystery in this case.

Thanks for the very thoughtful post.

 

[Phyzzle]

In some Asian cultures, people fall in love, get married, and have kids without kissing on the lips.

 

[Juando]

In some Asian cultures, people fall in love, get married, and have kids without kissing on the lips.

Bingo.

She's Asian. Left for the US at 19.

Despite all this, I'm on the edge of oneitis at the moment...

 

[joekerr31]

somethings definitely amiss if she's doing everything but kissing. sounds like she has some serious intimacy issues.

the 24 year age gap between the two of you might also be an issue. perhaps she sees you a bit as a daddy figure and psychologically (for whatever the reason) is comfortable enough with touching, but not something intimate like k*ssing.

 

[Juando]

somethings definitely amiss if she's doing everything but kissing. sounds like she has some serious intimacy issues.

the 24 year age gap between the two of you might also be an issue. perhaps she sees you a bit as a daddy figure and psychologically (for whatever the reason) is comfortable enough with touching, but not something intimate like k*ssing.

You're on it, joekerr, as usual.

I'm in a different place now, probably partly due to venting here- I was hung up on seeing her lips as the "gateway", not that I'm like some women whose attitude about kissing is make or break.

She was rassling with me a couple of hours ago and not I did not even try to kiss the lips, but who cares when I got to stroke her coochie?

I'm willing to play along if no lips adds up to action.

I'll have to get my lip quota elsewhere, meanwhile I feel like Marco Polo.

 

[britiny_9]

sorry friend,i have no any answer for you ,but you have get all enjoy of the
world.good luck